Life is better with Reeses
It took me and Maeg forty-five minutes to drive three miles from my work to Somerville. Unbelievable. Damn you last minute shoppers. Self included.
My mother's most recent crazy idea is to have a Yankee Swap tomorrow with her, dad, Becky, Maeg, me, Auntie Denise, and Uncle Brian. A few months ago, my aunt fell at work and basically tore her arm out of her socket (imagine a 300 lb bag of flour hitting the floor like a ton o'bricks). She went on disability and was subsequently (and illegally) let go from her job. She eventually had surgery and is not unable to work because of her injury. My uncle lost his job as a security guard, found a comparable job and then lost it within a month. And Maeg is currently unemployed.
My mother figured it would be both fun and economical to go to spend ten bucks at the local dollar store, stuff the crap into an over-sized sock, and proceed to Yankee into the wee hours of the morning. It should be fun, no doubt, but unconventional nonetheless. Maybe my appreciation hinges on denial...
WHAT RECESSION?
WHAT GLOBAL ECONOMICAL CRISIS?
IT'S FREAKING PUPPY DOGS AND LOLLIPOPS UP IN THIS PIECE.
We skipped through aisles and found our goodies in under twenty minutes and headed to the register. As we stood in line, I debated between going with the traditional stocking or doing a holiday gift basket using a cheap wicker type deal that only a virgin mother giving birth to a young savior in a busted barn could love. I decided against the basket and proceeded to sweat through my long-johns and Northeastern hoodie until we were next in line.
The lady in front of us managed to find some clothing boxes with extremely adorable holiday prints on them to use (what I can only assume) as gifts boxes. You could tell that she had been there for a while, putting much effort into finding those cutey needles in the haystack of complete garbage. When it came time to pay, the cashier informed her that they do not accept Mastercard as credit, only as debit. This was a problem for a few reasons:
1. She didn't speak English so of course, this made absolutely no sense to her
2. She didn't seem to have another card...
3. Or cash
So I did what any fellow last minute shopper who had just sat in traffic for an hour only to stand in line for another twenty would do: I paid for her stuff. I just had to. When we finally made it home, there was a Christmas card waiting for me from James -- an incredible freelance client of mine. In it was a fifty dollar Amex gift card.
Thanks Powers That Be. I knew you'd have my back.
The lucky winner of my stocking will receive:
- Three-pack of mini cereal boxes (Nutty Loops, Frosted Corn Flakes, Choco Pops)
- Plaid gardening gloves
- Pocket Sudoku
- The Holy Bible on CD (King James version, of course)
- Fabric softner dryer sheets (lavender & vanilla scent)
- Can o'dog food (chicken flavor)
- Stain removal pen
- Beef jerky chew (complete with plastic chew 'tin')
- Tampons
Must attend to wrapping each item individually.
That is all.
My mother's most recent crazy idea is to have a Yankee Swap tomorrow with her, dad, Becky, Maeg, me, Auntie Denise, and Uncle Brian. A few months ago, my aunt fell at work and basically tore her arm out of her socket (imagine a 300 lb bag of flour hitting the floor like a ton o'bricks). She went on disability and was subsequently (and illegally) let go from her job. She eventually had surgery and is not unable to work because of her injury. My uncle lost his job as a security guard, found a comparable job and then lost it within a month. And Maeg is currently unemployed.
My mother figured it would be both fun and economical to go to spend ten bucks at the local dollar store, stuff the crap into an over-sized sock, and proceed to Yankee into the wee hours of the morning. It should be fun, no doubt, but unconventional nonetheless. Maybe my appreciation hinges on denial...
WHAT RECESSION?
WHAT GLOBAL ECONOMICAL CRISIS?
IT'S FREAKING PUPPY DOGS AND LOLLIPOPS UP IN THIS PIECE.
We skipped through aisles and found our goodies in under twenty minutes and headed to the register. As we stood in line, I debated between going with the traditional stocking or doing a holiday gift basket using a cheap wicker type deal that only a virgin mother giving birth to a young savior in a busted barn could love. I decided against the basket and proceeded to sweat through my long-johns and Northeastern hoodie until we were next in line.
The lady in front of us managed to find some clothing boxes with extremely adorable holiday prints on them to use (what I can only assume) as gifts boxes. You could tell that she had been there for a while, putting much effort into finding those cutey needles in the haystack of complete garbage. When it came time to pay, the cashier informed her that they do not accept Mastercard as credit, only as debit. This was a problem for a few reasons:
1. She didn't speak English so of course, this made absolutely no sense to her
2. She didn't seem to have another card...
3. Or cash
So I did what any fellow last minute shopper who had just sat in traffic for an hour only to stand in line for another twenty would do: I paid for her stuff. I just had to. When we finally made it home, there was a Christmas card waiting for me from James -- an incredible freelance client of mine. In it was a fifty dollar Amex gift card.
Thanks Powers That Be. I knew you'd have my back.
The lucky winner of my stocking will receive:
- Three-pack of mini cereal boxes (Nutty Loops, Frosted Corn Flakes, Choco Pops)
- Plaid gardening gloves
- Pocket Sudoku
- The Holy Bible on CD (King James version, of course)
- Fabric softner dryer sheets (lavender & vanilla scent)
- Can o'dog food (chicken flavor)
- Stain removal pen
- Beef jerky chew (complete with plastic chew 'tin')
- Tampons
Must attend to wrapping each item individually.
That is all.