(no subject)
I feel like shit. My heart hurts, I want this pain to go away. Why can't I just... Sigh... Why can't I just be what he wants and show him that that's what I am? Why can't anyone see that in me? I'm everything that nobody wants and I'm too afraid to admit it. Can't he see I want him? Can't he see that I'd do most anything for him? Why can't he see me..? Why can't anyone see me...
I guess this is all crap that no one is going to read. And I should care because I guess we're too alike to be together. Mike says there are plenty of guys that want me, but it's hard to believe him, seeing as no one has wanted me up until this point. Why should change now?
The Park Inn is delicious, if anyone hears me, you should eat there and order a pizza, they have the best pizza.
I've been reading Cure lyrics lately. They are so beautiful, the first lyrics to make me want to cry. They're just so sad, but when you listen to them they don't seem so sad. To Wish Impossible Things is so sweet and sad. And How Beautiful You Are is incredible. I wish I could have people look at me like that... I wish someone would look at me.
I used to think I could talk to Lauren about anything, but the more I think about it I can't bring myself to say anything to her. All these feeling, hopes, fears... They all go unsaid and unheard, streaming through the night sky, bouncing off my bedroom walls. My thoughts turn towards the boys I'll never get only to sharply turn to how shallow I am for thinking about that. Then I begin to wonder about life, trees, stars and I begin to realise that I don't fit in. I've never belonged, but I want to so badly. I think about all the mean and hateful things people have said about me when they don't know anything about me.
I want someone to see me, to notice me. I want someone to see the sadness in my eyes, or the beauty of my heart. I want them to reach out and grab my hand before I fall of this bridge. I don't mean the world to anyone, but I want to so badly. I always am second, I want to be the first, I want someone to dream about me, hold me, love me, talk to me. I don't want them to expect me to solve their problems, only to listen, unspeaking. I want to feel important.
I want to feel important. I want to feel important. I want to feel important. I want to feel important. I want to feel important. I want to feel important. I want to feel important. I want to feel important. I want to feel important. I want to feel important. That's all...
I guess this is all crap that no one is going to read. And I should care because I guess we're too alike to be together. Mike says there are plenty of guys that want me, but it's hard to believe him, seeing as no one has wanted me up until this point. Why should change now?
The Park Inn is delicious, if anyone hears me, you should eat there and order a pizza, they have the best pizza.
I've been reading Cure lyrics lately. They are so beautiful, the first lyrics to make me want to cry. They're just so sad, but when you listen to them they don't seem so sad. To Wish Impossible Things is so sweet and sad. And How Beautiful You Are is incredible. I wish I could have people look at me like that... I wish someone would look at me.
I used to think I could talk to Lauren about anything, but the more I think about it I can't bring myself to say anything to her. All these feeling, hopes, fears... They all go unsaid and unheard, streaming through the night sky, bouncing off my bedroom walls. My thoughts turn towards the boys I'll never get only to sharply turn to how shallow I am for thinking about that. Then I begin to wonder about life, trees, stars and I begin to realise that I don't fit in. I've never belonged, but I want to so badly. I think about all the mean and hateful things people have said about me when they don't know anything about me.
I want someone to see me, to notice me. I want someone to see the sadness in my eyes, or the beauty of my heart. I want them to reach out and grab my hand before I fall of this bridge. I don't mean the world to anyone, but I want to so badly. I always am second, I want to be the first, I want someone to dream about me, hold me, love me, talk to me. I don't want them to expect me to solve their problems, only to listen, unspeaking. I want to feel important.
I want to feel important. I want to feel important. I want to feel important. I want to feel important. I want to feel important. I want to feel important. I want to feel important. I want to feel important. I want to feel important. I want to feel important. That's all...