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[porcelain_life]

Why do I hate myself so bad? I can't think about anything but my ugly body and face and how I feel uncomfortable... no matter what I try to tell myself, no matter how I try to think about beautiful things, I just cannot stand it anymore- again... Had one of my "attacks" last night... "visions" of somebody cutting a line on my body, hitting me with

Comments

[seelen_pirat]

Darling, I'm afraid to put my thoughts into letters, but this is hardly anything else but paranoia. You need some fucking help, right now, because it can (and it will) get worse - and hey, don't try kidding me, you know these consequences pretty well.

I think you hate yourself so much because there's something WRONG inside of you, and you'll have to tidy up this mess before you strumble and break your neck.

What you tell is frightening... if I knew you personally I'd prolly force you to get to see any professionalist!

Wake up, goddamnit!

[seelen_pirat]

Btw, what's so fucking difficult in calling your French teacher and ask for some advice to call a psychiatrist?
Tell me, I don't get it. I've had fucking EIGHT in fifteen years of living, believe me, it's easy.

[porcelain_life]

It's not hard... it's just... I don't know where to go and what to tell and I'm afraid it won't help, you know? But I'll do this, I promise... just not now... I know, it's my own fault... god...

[seelen_pirat]

God won't help you, maybe guard you, but not help you at all. *snort*

IT WILL HELP, if you let it. It will. Because you don't want this stuff.

I don't only believe in you, I KNOW that you will do it. I just don't know if you have the guts to swing your ASS over there and... u know.