(no subject)
I find it difficult when someone really wants me to care for them. When this person keeps calling and talks about everything, ending the conversation with "I'm so glad you listened to me. If you ever need to talk, I'll lend an ear." Which is quite ironic, because the entire time he didn't stop talking. Just jabber jabber jabber. I wouldn't be able to talk to him even if I wanted to. And of course, my brain tell me he only offers so he doesn't feel bad about trying to make me care about him.
I'm not sure if I'm just jaded, but I certainly don't have anyone I can let care for me. Maybe I'm just not letting the right person in? Am I really that closed off from the world? I feel like I care for a lot of people but none of them care for me back. I have three people I can reliably talk to: one's my mother so I can't talk to her about EVERYTHING, one is someone I really don't want to rely on but I feel like I have no one else, and the final one is off in his own little world 90% of the time and I can't get through to him.
I've tried not caring, but that doesn't work. I'm not built that way. And maybe people care about me more than I think, but I just don't let them show it? I don't know.
I'm not sure if I'm just jaded, but I certainly don't have anyone I can let care for me. Maybe I'm just not letting the right person in? Am I really that closed off from the world? I feel like I care for a lot of people but none of them care for me back. I have three people I can reliably talk to: one's my mother so I can't talk to her about EVERYTHING, one is someone I really don't want to rely on but I feel like I have no one else, and the final one is off in his own little world 90% of the time and I can't get through to him.
I've tried not caring, but that doesn't work. I'm not built that way. And maybe people care about me more than I think, but I just don't let them show it? I don't know.