Tournado Picspam - Part 3
Part 1 | Part 2
On the subject of his dirty little secret...
Chris: Every time I poop, I get a boner *winks* It's true. I think the poop tickles my prostate and arouses me. And so I have to jizz onto the turd, so it's like, poo in the toilet, with little sperm wads on top of it.
ISN'T THIS AN AMAZING START TO OUR THIRD INSTALMENT? XD
Chris's eyes like, KNOCK ME DEAD. EVERY SINGLE TIME.
Ok, so how much do I love this? A shit load. Excuse the (very bad) pun. Oh Chris. He says "arouses me." And I have a giggle fit every single time! I keep expecting him to say something like, "turns me on" but he's so nice and proper about it! Hahahaha. His logic is quite sound though...
Nick: We got a cake for Mr Brad Stonner, our stage manager - it's his birthday. And apparently he's a dick. According to the wording on his penis cake. We're gonna present it during the show!
LOL PENIS CAKE. ONLY THIS BAND GUYS, ONLY THIS BAND. ALSO, HAI NICK, YOU'RE PRETTY.
Tyson: Here we are. In a natural after-show environment. Don't talk loudly, coz we might disturb them. Alright, let's look in on the after-show environment.
Tyson as a nature show host! OMFG. WOULDN'T THAT JUST BE THE AWESOMEST THING EVAR? I'M IMAGINING HIM IN KHAKI SHORTS AND BOOTS AND WEARING A LITTLE EXPLORER HAT. *bursts into hearts*
Over here...over here we have a Dave Lopez in its perfect pristine beauty. Look as he scratches. About to pounce! Practically ready to attack. You never know. It's chemical imbalances. Insane. Oh, let's move over to the right.
Tyson's commentary is...well, it's made of crack. XD
Here is a Pavin. Now, these are very rare, ladies and gentlemen. We are seeing something that nature never reveals, and that is a Pavin, completely still. Normally they flap their wings, and you can't see them like a hummingbird. Let's move to the right.
THIS GUY. PAVIN. I ADORE HIM AND I'VE NEVER EVEN SEEN HIM ANYWHERE BESIDES THIS. LOOK AT HIM SMILING. D'AWWW.
Here is a crouched Shabba, ready to pounce. He's an animal. Notice he wears his hat. That is merely a mating device. That's how he lures his prey.
SHABBA! ♥
And it's over - it's just like that. Nature is just beautiful. It's there for a second, and then gone. Thank you for joining me. This has been Nature Watch.
Oh that smile. Here Tyson, just have my heart.
Tyson: Here I stand, with one problem. The motor just seized up.
Mike: *being comforted by Ty* Our bus! I love our bus! It's such a good bus... Now it's dead...=(
THIS. THIS. IT IS ONE OF MY FAVOURITE MIKE MOMENTS EVER. HOW. WHUT. I CAN'T EVEN. SOMEONE WRAP HIM UP WITH A BIG RED BOW AND LEAVE HIM UNDER MY TREE FOR CHRISTMAS.
Shared rooms again! AWWWWW. I want to know what they talk about before they fall asleep at night. In my severely deranged mind, it's like a tween sleepover, with pillowfights.
Nick: Here we are in beautiful Kansas City, Missouri. Unless this is Kansas...*looks to Mike* Is this Missouri or Kansas?
Mike: This is Missouri.
Nick: Beautiful Kansas City, Missouri. So our bus broke down last night, and we were forced to move out and uh, move onto the production bus. Which was actually quite glorious. I woke up *is in mid-yawn, and IT IS PRECIOUS* to Bob, the accountant, saying (here, he puts on a...Texan accent? IDK, I'm not American - you guys tell me. XD) "Hey! We're here! Git up! Whoo doggy!" We don't have that on our bus - we just sleep and when we wake up, we stumble off, wonder where the hell we are and then call Shabba and say "Hey! What do I do?"
NICK'S WAIST. *____*
THE WAY HE SAYS "MISSOURI" OMFG. HE DELIBERATELY DRAGS IT OUT AND SAYS "MOH-SSOURI" BECAUSE HE KNOWS IT IS ADORABLE. That is my theory, because he's trying to kill me with cute, remember? There is no "awwww" big enough to fully express how darling the "are we in Kansas or Missouri?" debate is. <3333
Mike: We're attempting to uh, get some Christmas shopping done. Coz uh, I don't think anybody's gotten too much. *sheepish smile*
*GLEE* Christmas shopping! Rockstar!fail. ;D
Mike: From hotel turn left onto Green street.
Nick: Eating is fun, eating is serious; you eat too much, you're gonna get delirious; eat too little, you're gonna disappearious.
1. They're doing their own navigating! I don't know why I find this insanely precious!
2. Nick's D&G sunglasses! AHAHAHA, NICK YOU PRISSY BITCH. ILY.
3. That ditty that Nick's singing? I figured it must be another American thing, so I googled and he's singing a little educational song thing! HAHAHAHHA. NICCCCCCK. <3
Tyson: So we're goin' Christmas shopping. =D
Is it possible to love them this much? I don't think it is.
Nick: There's gotta be a bank around here somewhere!
TYSON IS LOOKING AT HOME APPLIANCES, WHILE WHISTLING. NICK IS HOLDING THE DOOR OPEN FOR THE OTHER GUYS. WHYYY SO ADORABLEEEEE? *FLAILS SELF INTO A COMA*
Mike: Oooh!
Nick: You can adjust your height!
Mike: If only you could see what I'm feeling.
Nick: I never need a woman again.
HAHAHA. THEIR LITTLE FACES. Also, there's totally a joke about Nick and not needing women here, but for once, I'm not going to make it. *is proud of her self restraint*
Shopkeeper: Thanks for coming in guys.
Tyson: Thank you!
Sweetie! ♥
And Nick goes straight for the DVDs! Just my kinda guy!
So, I included this here purely so I had a reason to bring this up without sounding insane, but...do you guys pull AAR albums off shelves whenever you're in record stores just to admire them, even if you already own them? Just me?
DORKS. THEY ARE THE BIGGEST DORKS IN DORKSVILLE, DORKONIA. Look at Tyson's FAAAAACE. And Mike's CRAZY SMILE. And Nick's COMPLETELY MANLY POUT, WHAT HOW DARE YOU CALL HIM A ~POSER~
Nick: I've bought nothing so far today. Veeeery far behind - I've gotten several ideas however.
Just turn up on peoples' doorsteps looking like that Nicky. It'll be better than anything you could ever buy them.
Nick: So, still in Kansas City, after a long hard day of Christmas shopping. We find ourselves on the 41st floor in a spinning cocktail lounge, enjoying a wonderful local Boulevard wheat beer. After another one of these however, the spinning probably isn't going to be as cool...
HEE. OH NICKOLAS.
I wish the lighting wasn't so shit here! I MUST BE ABLE TO SEE EVERY EXPRESSION HE MAKES OKAY.
Nick: We've got 3 more shows, then the 4th will be the filming of the DVD. Um...starting to get down to the wire.
Poor bbs. They were all really nervous about this thing. See how much they care? If you're not shitting kittens by this point, you are completely heartless.
HEY LOOK, IT'S THE GREEN BACKPACK! *flyingtackleglomps him*
Nick: Green Bay, Wisconsin. Just wakin' up, off the bus. *headcouch*
♥_____♥
ksdlfks;df. T%$(*%)$#%. *______________* My coherence...ness has finally succumbed to the adorable, so you tell me how you feel.
Poll Mike! Chris! Wrestling! Awww!
Mike: Sometimes you just gotta put a bitch in his place!
You tell em Kennerty!
LMFAO. They are such boys! I kind of want to feed them milk and cookies and sit them in front of the TV with an episode of Sesame Street.
Although the more I look at that last panel, the less innocent my thoughts become. In fact, they're downright filthy now.
Mike: With Chris Gaylor, sure he may have gotten me in some some fuckin' locks and some moves, but I punched his fuckin' dick!
And now I'm getting distracted, because oh hey Nick is half naked again and THEY'RE ALL SQUISHED SO PRECIOUSLY (SHUT UP, THAT'S A WORD) ONTO THAT TEENY TINY COUCH.
I LOVE THEM LIKE BURNING.
I ALSO LOVE THE DUDE JUST SITTING THERE NONCHALANTLY DRINKING HIS COFFEE. THIS IS CLEARLY A REGULAR OCCURRENCE.
Mike: That's what I do, I let them think they're winning...be like up in some grapple.. *makes noises of fake surrender*
You're a ninja Mike. *nods*
Chris: You have to be delicate with someone as fragile as Mike...
Mike: I can take my dick punches! *repeatedly punches his crotch* He can't do that!
Chris: LOLOLOL. *snuggles Mike*
Nick: LOLOLOL.
Tyson: *smiles serenely with his nicely crossed legs and manages to look prim and proper and incredibly gay as everything unfolds*
Clearly, there is an absolute need for Chris to wrap himself around Mike here. Obviously. Do not question his actions. And see the third panel? Nick is looking over at Ty! LOVEEEE.
Chris: I'm really...it's really weird - I've never done anything like this before. So it's a bit nervewracking.
Awww, Chris is on his first solo signing! He's nervous! I want to make him feel better! <3
Chris: I'm by myself! *looks up to fan* How're you doin' man?
Huggles xinfinity for you Chris. ♥
HAHAHAHHA. HIS FACE. I almost feel sorry for him having to endure this. He's clearly thinking "dear god, please get me out of here." Note: almost. Because this is hilarious and I'm cruel sometimes. XD
Tyson: I'm feeling good about the show tonight. I had two days off in between - I got a show, day off, show, day off. It's all you need to survive. =D *turns offscreen* Shut up Travis!
djkflsdf. Nggggggh. Tyson is so pretty it's physically painful.
Tyson: Right now we're doing pre-show rituals, which includes our wig of the day. Hey! You guys ever seen uh, Rock-A-Doodle? That movie? I feel like the lead chicken in Rock-A-Doodle.
AND THEN HE GOES AND DOES THIS AND I SNAP OUT OF IT AND START DYING OF LOL AGAIN. SEE HOW MANY 'AND'S ARE IN THAT SENTENCE? I AM SLOWLY LOSING MY SANITY.
Also, Ty's butt crack makes many an appearance during this doc. It should have its own line in the credits.
Tyson: Travis has been massaging my feet for the last 45 minutes coz they're dying. He's laughing because he had to bring out the pumice stone, didn't you? Yeah, my bunions were terrible!
Aaaaand. Yep, still painfully pretty. THAT THIRD PIC YOU GUYS. *heartclutch* HE IS SUCH A DARLING. ♥
Tyson: Gaylor's been throwing up against the wall, and then seeing how long it takes to get to water.
LOL, GAYLOR TESTICLES. *shakes head*
Tyson: Nick Wheeler has been actually doing cock flexing. Which, he blows his penis up in a penis pump and then flexes it flexes it flexes it...*to Nick* Did you burst a blood vessel today?
Nick: No but I'm so veiny.
Tyson: No basically the end of his dick looks like he's got gin blossoms.
AND HOW WOULD YOU KNOW TYSON?
Also? Still pretty.
Yeah, Nick's confused too. XD
CHRIS HAS AN ANNIE SHIRT. EXCUSE ME WHILE I DIE OF GLEE AND AMUSEMENT. NICK AND TY'S FACES! ADORABLE GOOFS! AND SOMEHOW MIKE MANAGES TO LOOK HOT FROM THE BACK/SIDE ON?
Tyson: The only reason people are famous is when you put 50 fuckin' armed security guards around em.
See the butt crack? I told you. XD Look at the last shot! Nick's pretty is visible even from a distance! =O
I...don't get what Tyson is trying to say? XDD You know you're famous when you need all the armed guards? You're only officially famous when you have the armed guards? It's ok - homeboy doesn't need to make sense anyway, everyone gets distracted by the pretty.
Rollercoaster lady: Do you guys wanna spin a lot or a little?
Nick: A lot!
YOU GUYSSS. THEY'RE GETTING ON A ROLLERCOASTER TOGETHER. SOMEBODY HUG ME, IT'S ALL TOO MUCH.
OMG, OKAY. If there was ever a time when Nick sounded like a little boy, IT'S RIGHT HERE. EVEN THE WAY HE'S RUBBING HIS NOSE. NAWWWW. And yes, that is him clapping joyously in the last shot. I AM FIGHTING THE URGE TO COO AT MY SCREEN.
Mmmm, wet Wheeler. Also, if you pause at the right time, you'll be able to catch a good glimpse of his elusive Tournado tatt. I heart it. And, um. He's wearing nothing but a towel. I feel I should point this out so it's not embarrassing when I'm the only one who faints.
Mike: I'm nervous as fuck - I hate days like this.
...he says as he grins sunnily. Because that's how he rolls, bitch.
GHOSTBUSTERS TEE. EVERY SINGLE THING ABOUT THIS BAND BRINGS ME SUCH JOY.
Chris: I'm gonna get this done, so I don't have to worry about it anymore.
Haha, oh honey. <3
PRE-SHOW RITUALS. Nick's hair is glorious! TYSON IS MOCKING FONDLY IN THE BACKGROUND. NICK'S COLLARBONES ARE TEH SEX. CHRIS IS DOING...LEG UPS? LOLOL.
Tyson is still mocking fondly! Nick is just teh sex full stop! Mikey is pacing nervously! *snugglehuggles*
Tyson: I'm ready...I think I'm ready. I'm on fire.
You always are my love, you always are.
And finally! The boys get up on stage to do their thing. A montage set to "It Ends Tonight" rolls, interspersing the boys rocking the fuck out with clips played back from the doc. I'm not gonna lie, I literally tear up a little at it.
Lastly...
...Tyson smashes his bass in a fit of badassery. I cringe very hard and make grabby hands at it though.
...
Okay, I lied, there's one last bit, AND LUCKILY FOR ME (and maybe you guys, if you're anything like me and still get teary at happy endings) IT IS MADE OF SHEER EPIC LULZ AND AWESOME.
IT REQUIRES GIF FORM, BECAUSE IT MUST BE APPRECIATED IN ITS MOVING-NESS.
JUST LOOK AT THEM. THEY'RE DANCING (WIGGLING?) ALONG TO SOME SILLY TUNE ON CHRIS'S CELL PHONE. THEY ARE ADORABLE LIKE LITTLE CUPCAKES WITH PINK AND BLUE ICING AND SPRINKLES. GLITTAH SPRINKLES, BITCHES.
And that concludes my shameless flail. Thank you, my lovelies, for all your flailing supportive comments along the way. I had so much fun glee'ing with you guys! ♥
ETA: In case any of you were wanting to make icons (BECAUSE THERE CAN NEVER BE ENOUGH OF OUR BOYS IN 100x100 BOXES), here are the caps: Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3