give me advice. even if it's anonymous. just comment.

[pop_miasma]

put yourself in this general situation.
the basic lowdown: a decision has to be made. you have a few weeks left to make this decision. parties affected by this decision include you and someone you love. goal #1, which ranks as top priority: preserve happiness of loved one. goal #2: get "closure" for yourself, whatever that is.

option a: take

Comments

[somuchope]

irregardless of the specifics, purposeful and fulfilling lives are nearly impossible to lead without taking action on the things you care about. You do whatever you can to reach for the brightest strand of happiness regardless of its strength or likelihood.

and hey, if things should turn out for the worst, at least you know that you can leave it behind you by starting over when you go to college

this is like being in a gameshow where you get to see what prize is behind the mystery door, but unlike one, in that if you don't like what's behind it, you can still say fuck it, and take the exotic vacation to college. Despite the immediate pain of possible rejection, there is ultimately no way to lose yes?

oh baby

[pop_miasma]

when i slept after i had posted this, i had a dream that you decided to make some complex indie film out of your response to it. haha

but yeah...i'm just way fucking afraid that if i get emotionally bitchslapped it'll cripple my attempt to start a new life. i really don't want to feel like i've left a mess behind at home.
it's like...if i open up the mystery door, and some crazy possessed creature of death comes out, i won't just be able to say fuck it and go because it'll maim me o_O;

your random 'oh babys' make you sound like a pimp. a pimp with one of those damn hats. fedora? is that how you spell it? and for some reason when the words "trevor" and "pimp" combine in my head, the word "penguin" immediately follows. oh my

[somuchope]

oh yes, i hope to indulge myself in all forms of art throughout my lifetime

[unknwnunderwear]

Whether or not she would stay here isn't really a question. He wouldn't because he is more than likely going off to Japan. And it is love of a different sort because...let's just say it couldn't be the kind of love you're thinking of.

[pop_miasma]

dude, is anyone believing that this post really isn't specific? anyone at all?

...

...*gets eaten by the demons of livejournal sins*

[unknwnunderwear]

Haha I believe it :) I just think that is one of the bigger things.

i'm a wuss

[pop_miasma]

maybe i should acknowledge that you're right. just in case he's reading this, and encourages him to say something first and spare me a few more weeks of contemplation ^_^

i get back from baltimore the 24th, and when i do everyone within a 2349084808 radius shall see my pictures. we can go get them developed at walgreens and stalk the hot photo guy.

Re: i'm a wuss

[unknwnunderwear]

Josh. Oh baby ;)

[pop_miasma]

nothing short of the east coast falling off into the ocean would stop me from leaving o.o; no matter what the outcome, i'm still taking off.

i don't trust people
and i don't know if i trust anyone to 'forgive' me because i don't have much experience with being forgiven. i don't usually have anything i apologize for. things i should have apologized for, that's open to debate, but either way i rarely have anything i'm asking for forgiveness over. and i'm thinking....and i think that's only happened with two people...one of them took years to really get over it, and i tortured myself the entire damn time. that whole thing is part of what is driving my sorry ass away to baltimore, to this day!! i mean, how fucked up is that, that the people you love the most seem to be the ones that you're apologizing to the most? but the bottom line is, i don't really know how to deal with having my apologies rejected because i have so little experience with the shit. what on earth are you supposed to do when you absolutely love someone, and they don't

[somuchope]

geez, that's a hard question to answer