Fic: “Out from under Her bough” Fran - FFXII

[pookaseraph]

Title: Out from under Her bough
Word Count: 185
Rating: G
Theme: Rather be lonely in love than alive with and dead.
Charaters: Fran
Notes: Spoilers to Eryut, for ff_100 challenge 20.

Comments

[fixermark]

I like this piece a lot. Two well-used paragraphs: A quick shot of facts for context, and a haiku-esque scene of one moment in Fran's life, given that context. We're left wondering what the impetus was that drove her to take that fateful step. We don't get to find out (and maybe she herself doesn't know consciously?), but knowing that she can't predict what will happen next and yet takes the step anyway is really powerful; a very tantalizing clue to her character.

If I were king of... Um.... Your head, I guess... I'd have let the last sentence be its own paragraph. But I'm given over to unnecessary dramatics---it's less emphasized as you wrote it, which is also good.

Great job! A++++++ would read again.

[pookaseraph]

You're the best! Thanks. :)

I hear you on the 'last line separate paragraph' but lo you are not the king of my head. I like it subdued. (puts on snob cap) I guess I like that in it's 'tacked on at the end-edness' makes it 'not important' but also 'extra important' (takes off snob cap)

Sometimes I really love the 'choppy sentences'.

[animecrush]

Agreeing with fixermark, this was a very beautiful piece. I love your take on Fran's decision to leave the Wood and her inner struggle. Really a fantastic job.

[pookaseraph]

Thank you, I feel Fran is one of the more under-loved members of the team. I might be wrong, but I give her the love anyway.