(no subject)

[poetictragedy39]

so it's monday... and almost everyone i know has school tomorrow. whether they're in highschool and started last week or in college, most of which start today, they're all going to have class one way or the other. i'm not tho... and i'm wondering if that was a bad idea. i think i'm doing the right thing. i mean it's only one semester, and if i dont have class, it'll be easier to get more work hours in. which in turn means more money. it's sure as hell not gonna be easy paying off credit debt (not my fault, damn bank) plus trying to save money for a car, an apartment, plane tickets, and then maybe have a little spending money on the side (yeah right). i just have waaaay too much on my mind and its too hard to just relax and sleep. it doesn't help that being sick this weekend threw off my sleep schedule. i was up till 7 AM thursday night/friday morning... then was in bed till 5 feeling sick, then up till about 4 friday night/saturday morning and woke up at 10 to do bank stuff and shopping for my room, which i will put in a link for later... then i didnt go to sleep till 6 that night/sunday morning, and was in bed till 4:30 or so feeling shitty, so i was just in bed 2 and 1/2 hours trying to fall asleep and i've spent most of it just laying in different positions and then thinking a lot before switching positions again. last week i feel i accomplished a lot. with the help of kevin and pat. we cleaned my room, and consolidated all my stuff. a lot ended up in garbage bags or is soon to be a part of a great fire... but lots went to giveaway too which i feel kinda good about. it took a lotta moving heavy shit, chosing whether something was worth keeping or if i was just a packrat, one dead vaccuum, and probly too much money spent. also, it led to more credit debt, but i bought the stuff before i was aware my bank had fucked up huge and so... it's not my fault. anyway, the room is sweet, and you can see a few pictures here: http://photobucket.com/albums/c236/lostbrokenconfused39/The%20LAIR/ so you should come chill with me there. in other news... i miss california a whole lot. i miss it more than i thought i would... i mean i knew going back would make me love it more... but not this much more. and on top of the fact i love cali, theres people there that i miss dearly... and it's sad to be without their company. it's especially sad to be without a cuddle partner, but that's just how it is. i'll be out there soon hopefully... that is if i get this job today... or if i get that job at FedEx which would also be very nice. i suppose i should go now tho and try to sleep again since i've been here at least a half hour.

...no blinding light, or tunnels to gates of white, just our hands clasped so tight...

~dave