reframing "sexual maturity"

[pocochina]

I’d like to challenge prevailing ideas of “sexual maturity” from a pro-PWD (and particular, people with invisible mental illness) perspective.  This is clearly an idea found within mainstream feminism, but I don’t think it’s really all that distinguishable from mainstream thought in general, so, you know, apply as necessary.  Overall, it is

Comments

[neurotic_orchid]

This is a great post, although it's not representative of my personal experience. While I have struggled with mental illness for most of my life (anxiety/OCD), I never felt judged or like I was viewed as immature for choosing to abstain from sex. I had sex a couple of months before my 20th birthday, and I truly wasn't "ready" before then. While it did impact the types of guys who were interested in me, I was always viewed by others as mature and accomplished. I was stereotyped based on my academic achievement and emotional maturity - not my sexual readiness.

Now in one's 20s or 30s, I'm sure that perception changes. I was having sex by then so it wasn't an issue I dealt with as an adult. I do think there is a perception that women who are "still virgins(!)" in early to middle adulthood are somehow either immature or not doable for whatever reason. I guess, for me, it just wasn't an issue during the teenage years. I read a stay recently that described what percentage of men and women had had sex by the end of the first year of university. The numbers were lower than most would expect. I think the perception of everyone else having sex is skewed.

[pocochina]

I'm really glad that you had such a positive experience. (I wonder how much of this is a national/cultural issue? Americans seem to have an exceptionalist attitude towards sexuality issues.)

I'm more concerned with the fact that this is the language used by people who are advocating and creating sex-ed websites and curricula. It's not so much coming from other kids that I'm worried about (well, maybe it is now, but not as I remember). I don't want something which I worry is exclusionist and possibly harmful playing such a big role in the pro-sex discourse. If that makes sense.