i'm a stupid, stupid kid + top chef
I have a lot of things to update about, but I'm feeling really em0 at the moment. I hate posting ridiculously depressing things in this journal if I can help it--I have a private journal just for that and I certainly make use of it but... I don't know.
I'm having trouble sleeping? Because I keep having these dreams. And this entry is going to be really vague and I'm sorry about that but... yeah. It's a problem I've been having constantly for the past several months, and it's a certain dream in particular and it's really, really starting to fuck me up. I thought I had dealt with it, but apparently not, and it's just screwing me up beyond belief. And Steven keeps giving me advice and I just don't know. I don't sleep and then I get tired and I don't get things done. I'm super behind in reading the itsproductivity entries, my own have been right at the deadline each night, and my other obligations are slipping too. I'm a total mess. It's just... not at all cool.
I'm just... totally losing it, guys. I need to find a way to put this whole thing behind me, but at the same time, I don't want to. If that makes any sense.
Anyway. Um. I just wanted to get that out, I guess. Sorry. :\
***
In less vague news, I'm watching Top Chef and I wish I could express in words how much I love Ted Allen. Like, seriously? I can't explain how HAPPY I am every time I turn my teevee on and he's there. Really? We need to be best friends. For serious.
Also? I'm seriously in love with Lia. She is just... so adorable and cute and I can't even deal with it. I love her. I was so excited when she won this week and... aalkjfieowjlksd f really, I kind of want to do her. Like, a lot. Oh man. I'm so freaking shallow.
Also, Steven is coming over on Saturday! It will be like I have a friend! That never happens anymore!
***
Anyway, I'm tired to trying to make this a legitimate entry, so I'm going to go try and write something that isn't me projecting my issues all over my characters.
I'm having trouble sleeping? Because I keep having these dreams. And this entry is going to be really vague and I'm sorry about that but... yeah. It's a problem I've been having constantly for the past several months, and it's a certain dream in particular and it's really, really starting to fuck me up. I thought I had dealt with it, but apparently not, and it's just screwing me up beyond belief. And Steven keeps giving me advice and I just don't know. I don't sleep and then I get tired and I don't get things done. I'm super behind in reading the itsproductivity entries, my own have been right at the deadline each night, and my other obligations are slipping too. I'm a total mess. It's just... not at all cool.
I'm just... totally losing it, guys. I need to find a way to put this whole thing behind me, but at the same time, I don't want to. If that makes any sense.
Anyway. Um. I just wanted to get that out, I guess. Sorry. :\
***
In less vague news, I'm watching Top Chef and I wish I could express in words how much I love Ted Allen. Like, seriously? I can't explain how HAPPY I am every time I turn my teevee on and he's there. Really? We need to be best friends. For serious.
Also? I'm seriously in love with Lia. She is just... so adorable and cute and I can't even deal with it. I love her. I was so excited when she won this week and... aalkjfieowjlksd f really, I kind of want to do her. Like, a lot. Oh man. I'm so freaking shallow.
Also, Steven is coming over on Saturday! It will be like I have a friend! That never happens anymore!
***
Anyway, I'm tired to trying to make this a legitimate entry, so I'm going to go try and write something that isn't me projecting my issues all over my characters.