[One-shot] I already know
I already know
Dance Umbrella - Yara/Yamamoto
2104 words, PG, canonfic
Yamamoto worries he's going to ruin everything.
This was a draft for yararanger's Rainbowbridge 2011, but was axed early on due to it being... well, bad. u_u; Now finished! And with no porn, though not for lack of trying on the Yaramuse's part. :|b
Feelings, Yamamoto decided during rehearsal break, were really, really stupid.
Or maybe the problem was that he felt them too strongly. They would just come into his heart, nestle there, hatch eggs of even more complicated emotions, and refuse to go away. And maybe it wouldn’t be so bad if it was purely personal, but he seemed stupidly prone to mixing work with personal times, and thus he’d wounded up staring at his reflection in the practice hall mirrors and wondering…
The question of ‘what if’ was a stupidly melancholy one.
“Ryou-chan,” Tatsumi hummed as he gently knocked the lidded plastic cup against Yamamoto’s forehead, starling him out of his reverie. “One strawberry crème frap for youuuu, a peppermint mocha for Kosshi, annnnnnnd a chocolate frap for me~.”
Koshioka greeted Tatsumi with appreciative groan, eagerly accepting the drink, Yamamoto echoing it as he drew his own drink towards him. It was the middle of Playzone rehearsals and Tatsumi had been delegated the day’s coffee run, which Yamamoto rather liked because he knew he’d always get the drinks soonest. “I love you,” he reiterated with a sigh as he licked at the whipped cream on top, promptly getting some on his nose.
“You better, smartass,” Tatsumi told him, before whisking away with a bellow of “Yaracchi, your coffee is getting cold!”
The name sent a small shiver through Yamamoto and he froze, finger in mid-swipe on his nose as he watched Tatsumi’s back. Yara Tomoyuki…
“Hey, hey, Ryouta, you’re going to spill that.” Koshioka interrupted his thoughts to make a grab at the dangerously tipping beverage in Yamamoto’s hand. “What’s up? You’ve been kind of out of it all day. It’s been ages since Yara’s had to scold you like that.”
Flushing, Yamamoto finished wiping off his nose, choosing to not answer in favor of licking his finger clean. He was still flustered over the incident, but he supposed he deserved it. It was a little too late in the game to be falling in the middle of choreographies, especially on a tight number like ‘March!’ But he had a lot on his mind and it was easily distracting him.
He could feel Koshioka’s eyes on him and glanced up to find the man grinning at him, chin propped on his hand. “Want to talk about it?”
Yamamoto flushed a deeper red. “It’s nothing,” he muttered, taking a sip of his frap.
“Aw, c’mon,” Koshioka wheedled, just as Tatsumi returned, dropping into the nearest vacant seat and claiming his drink. “Tell me!”
“Tell you what?” Tatsumi questioned, between sips. “Ryou-chan?”
Yamamoto whined, hiding behind his drink. “Don’t wannaaaa.”
“Well, now you really have to tell us,” Tatsumi said, reaching over to poke at Yamamoto’s cheek. “You’re blushing~.”
“Shut up,” Yamamoto grumbled, but chanced a glance at Tatsumi anyways. He had been debating telling Tatsumi… and he liked Koshioka well enough. They were both older, they would surely have some advice about his predicament, wouldn’t they? “It’s just that I… ah…”
Just trying to talk about it was awkward enough, but he trained his eyes on his drink and tried to get the words out in a rush. “I just thinking that maybe I should tell Yaracchi about how I feel…”
There was a pregnant pause as both men peered at him, confusion written all over their faces. “… What do you mean by that?” Koshioka ventured after a few moments.
“Y-you know…” Yamamoto said under his breath, glancing between the two of them and back down at his drink. “Like… I really, really like him…”
“I…” Tatsumi opened his mouth, paused, and then continued on, “Ryou-chan, doesn’t everyone know that?”
Yamamoto blushed again, hands over his eyes in slight horror. “No, no… I mean like… it’s more than just the dancing and hanging out and stuff.” Okay, maybe this had been a bad idea, and as he saw Tatsumi opening his mouth again, Yamamoto jumped to his feet. “Just… Never mind. Don’t tell him anything, okay?” he rushed, giving them both a flustered glower before escaping over to Eda’s company.
Another silence ensued as Tatasumi and Koshioka watched Yamamoto leave, before Tatsumi sighed, in woeful dramatics.
“He’s cute, but sometimes I don’t know what to do with him.”
***
“What’s up?” Eda asked as Yamamoto plopped himself down on the floor next to him, promptly hiding his face in Eda’s shoulder. Hayashi was on Eda’s other side, with Takahashi half sprawled on his lap.
“Nothing,” Yamamoto said, voice muffled by the other’s hoodie, but resurfaced quickly, giving all three a petulant look. If Tatsumi wasn’t going to be any help, THEY Budou was his next best bet. “I need some help.”
Eda gave a hum of acknowledgement and Yamamoto found himself explaining things all over again. “I just… you know, I kind of want him to know that it’s not just an older brother thing. Like… I really like him. But what if it gets weird?” He played with the drawstring of Eda’s hoodie, tugging on it every now and then while he tried to quietly sort his head out.
Nobody needed to ask who he was. There were only so many people Yamamoto obsessively dwelled on.
Actually, there was only one.
“Ah, I was wondering why you were all zombiefied today.” Hayashi was biting back a smile, and Yamamoto was sorely tempted to reach across Eda to hit him before he spoke. “Why so nervous? Isn’t it better to just tell him? That’s what you normally do?”
“But this is different,” Yamamoto insisted vehemently, grimacing.
“Is it any different than that time you got drunk and told him you wanted to sleep with him?” Takahashi pointed out, propping himself up to give Yamamoto a sly smile. “Because I think if Yaracchi’s dealt with that, he can deal with anything.”
“Ryu, shut up,” Yamamoto hissed, looking around in horror. That was an incident that did not need to be repeated, as Yamamoto had been trying to rid it from his brain in mortification for nearly a year now. “And he was drunk too, it’s not like that’s similar at all.”
“I’m with them on this though,” Eda told him, reaching over to brush stray hair away from Yamamoto’s face. “It’s better to tell him, isn’t it?”
“But what if it really is just a little brother-big brother thing…?” Feeling miserable at the prospect, Yamamoto buried his face back in Eda’s shoulder.
“Well, I think if it was just that, he’d have strangled you ages ago, personally,” Ryu’s voice floated to his ears. Hayashi and Eda were both chuckling, and Yamamoto felt childish resentment, peeking up from the material to glower more. His predicament was hardly a laughing matter (even if he knew it really was. He should be done with the teenage blushing romance, wasn’t he?)
“Guuuuuuuys.” But Yamamoto didn’t get a change to protest further, however, because Yara was approaching them. He quickly shut up, face back on Eda’s shoulder.
Yara surveyed the small pile of kids (as Yone referred to them as - his kids, mind you ) and crooked a finger. “Ryouta, c’mere, I need to talk to you.”
Reluctantly, Yamamoto pulled himself to his feet, trying to hide as much of his face behind his hair. It was unnerving how Yara seemed to pop up every time Yamamoto tried to talk about him. Also, Yamamoto was almost positive he was going to get another scolding before they got back to rehearsing. “… Yeah?” he mumbled.
Yara chuckled warmly and Yamamoto’s heard skipped several beats. “Stop sulking, it looks so bad on you.”
“Whaaaat,” Ryouta’s frown merely deepened and he stared at his feet. It was too confusing in his head and he hated that mostly all he wanted to do was pull Yara closer and try kissing him.
Yara sighed, reaching over to tuck Yamamoto’s bangs away from his face. “Look, Ryouta, if you’re feeling under the weather, you have to tell me. I don’t want to push you too hard, but if you won’t say anything, I won’t know when to stop, you know? I trust you to be able to do this, but it’s okay if you need it to slow down today, because pushing too hard will just make tomorrow worse.”
Peeking up, Yamamoto found Yara watching him in concern, and that didn’t do anything to help his heartbeat either. “I’m fine,” he mumbled. Yara’s fingers had been warm against his skin, gentle and caring and everything Yamamoto had wanted.
***
Yamamoto dragged his feet after rehearsal, letting the others slide past him in a blur. He was annoyed at himself for being so hung up on the issue at hand, but at the same time… he knew he couldn’t help it.
If this had just been years ago, back when Yara had just been a cool senpai that danced leagues ahead of Yamamoto, he’d have been fine. An unrequited crush wasn’t so unusual, nor was the strong admiration he had felt for Yara back then.
But this was different. This was deeper and truly personal and it scared Yamamoto. Yara wasn’t just someone he admired. He was a friend, a mentor, an older brother-figure, and someone Yamamoto had fallen deeply in love with.
At first, it had been easy to ignore, but maybe that had been Yamamoto’s mistake. Feelings were, after all, very stupid things. They never did what you wanted them to do and so they’d grown, grown until Yamamoto couldn’t ignore them. He couldn’t ignore the way his stomach flip-flopped when Yara laughed, or how he’d sometimes pause, waiting for Yara to look his way and smile, because that would just make his day. Sometimes he wondered if he was merely deluding himself - Yara was a very friendly person after all - but he wanted to believe that sometimes those eyes softened just for him.
“Yikes,” he said, rubbing his eyes and realizing that most everyone else had left already.
Everyone else except…
“You seem a little lost in thought,” Yara said, leaning against the doorframe, watching Yamamoto in amusement. “I went to grab my bag and you were still here, staring off into space.”
Yamamoto grinned, embarrassed because he wasn’t sure how long he’d stood there, thinking about what it’d be like to go on real dates with Yara and things like holding hands and whatnot. “It’s been a long day,” he said after a bit, diving down to properly gather his stuff up.
“You did better this afternoon,” Yara assured him, warmly. “Now. I was going to take a quick shower and then why don’t you and I go out to dinner.”
“That’d be fun,” Yamamoto said, only half paying attention as he tried to find his sunglasses. “You said you’d show me that new place you really like.”
“… Ryouta,” Yara said after a moment, “I said ‘Why don’t you and I go out to dinner’.” He stressed those two words go out carefully.
“What? I know you did, I was just … Oh.” It took a moment for that to sink in and then Yamamoto was gaping at the man. “Oh.”
“Is that still a yes?” Yara asked with a smile.
Yamamoto made the most unintelligible noise, not sure what to do with his face, his hands, or the bag that had fallen to the ground again, because Yara had just asked him out on a date and he didn’t know exactly how one was supposed to properly proceed with that besides yes and yes.
“You knew?” he squeaked.
Yara’s eyes softened, the way Yamamoto loved and had been hoping would have to do with him. “I guessed. Subtlety was never your strong suit.”
So maybe Tatsumi had been right. Yamamoto could concede to that point, except he wasn’t sure how they’d gotten to this point where Yara was asking him out and knew and understood and things were still okay and he was just all flustered and confused until Yara was right there and kissing him.
It was a soft, sweet kiss. A perfect first kiss, with all the little reassurances Yamamoto had needed. He leaned in, curling his fingers into Yara’s shirt, reveling in the fit and feel of Yara’s mouth against his.
“That is definitely a yes,” he sighed as they pulled away, though he stayed near, not really wanting to let go now that he knew it was okay. Yara didn’t seem to mind at all, settling his arms around Yamamoto’s waist and pressing kisses to his cheek. “Definitely, definitely yes.”
Maybe feelings weren't so stupid after all.
“Shower first,” Yara said, laughing as he walked backwards, taking Yamamoto with him. “Care to join me?”
“Oh god, yes.”
Dance Umbrella - Yara/Yamamoto
2104 words, PG, canonfic
Yamamoto worries he's going to ruin everything.
This was a draft for yararanger's Rainbowbridge 2011, but was axed early on due to it being... well, bad. u_u; Now finished! And with no porn, though not for lack of trying on the Yaramuse's part. :|b
Feelings, Yamamoto decided during rehearsal break, were really, really stupid.
Or maybe the problem was that he felt them too strongly. They would just come into his heart, nestle there, hatch eggs of even more complicated emotions, and refuse to go away. And maybe it wouldn’t be so bad if it was purely personal, but he seemed stupidly prone to mixing work with personal times, and thus he’d wounded up staring at his reflection in the practice hall mirrors and wondering…
The question of ‘what if’ was a stupidly melancholy one.
“Ryou-chan,” Tatsumi hummed as he gently knocked the lidded plastic cup against Yamamoto’s forehead, starling him out of his reverie. “One strawberry crème frap for youuuu, a peppermint mocha for Kosshi, annnnnnnd a chocolate frap for me~.”
Koshioka greeted Tatsumi with appreciative groan, eagerly accepting the drink, Yamamoto echoing it as he drew his own drink towards him. It was the middle of Playzone rehearsals and Tatsumi had been delegated the day’s coffee run, which Yamamoto rather liked because he knew he’d always get the drinks soonest. “I love you,” he reiterated with a sigh as he licked at the whipped cream on top, promptly getting some on his nose.
“You better, smartass,” Tatsumi told him, before whisking away with a bellow of “Yaracchi, your coffee is getting cold!”
The name sent a small shiver through Yamamoto and he froze, finger in mid-swipe on his nose as he watched Tatsumi’s back. Yara Tomoyuki…
“Hey, hey, Ryouta, you’re going to spill that.” Koshioka interrupted his thoughts to make a grab at the dangerously tipping beverage in Yamamoto’s hand. “What’s up? You’ve been kind of out of it all day. It’s been ages since Yara’s had to scold you like that.”
Flushing, Yamamoto finished wiping off his nose, choosing to not answer in favor of licking his finger clean. He was still flustered over the incident, but he supposed he deserved it. It was a little too late in the game to be falling in the middle of choreographies, especially on a tight number like ‘March!’ But he had a lot on his mind and it was easily distracting him.
He could feel Koshioka’s eyes on him and glanced up to find the man grinning at him, chin propped on his hand. “Want to talk about it?”
Yamamoto flushed a deeper red. “It’s nothing,” he muttered, taking a sip of his frap.
“Aw, c’mon,” Koshioka wheedled, just as Tatsumi returned, dropping into the nearest vacant seat and claiming his drink. “Tell me!”
“Tell you what?” Tatsumi questioned, between sips. “Ryou-chan?”
Yamamoto whined, hiding behind his drink. “Don’t wannaaaa.”
“Well, now you really have to tell us,” Tatsumi said, reaching over to poke at Yamamoto’s cheek. “You’re blushing~.”
“Shut up,” Yamamoto grumbled, but chanced a glance at Tatsumi anyways. He had been debating telling Tatsumi… and he liked Koshioka well enough. They were both older, they would surely have some advice about his predicament, wouldn’t they? “It’s just that I… ah…”
Just trying to talk about it was awkward enough, but he trained his eyes on his drink and tried to get the words out in a rush. “I just thinking that maybe I should tell Yaracchi about how I feel…”
There was a pregnant pause as both men peered at him, confusion written all over their faces. “… What do you mean by that?” Koshioka ventured after a few moments.
“Y-you know…” Yamamoto said under his breath, glancing between the two of them and back down at his drink. “Like… I really, really like him…”
“I…” Tatsumi opened his mouth, paused, and then continued on, “Ryou-chan, doesn’t everyone know that?”
Yamamoto blushed again, hands over his eyes in slight horror. “No, no… I mean like… it’s more than just the dancing and hanging out and stuff.” Okay, maybe this had been a bad idea, and as he saw Tatsumi opening his mouth again, Yamamoto jumped to his feet. “Just… Never mind. Don’t tell him anything, okay?” he rushed, giving them both a flustered glower before escaping over to Eda’s company.
Another silence ensued as Tatasumi and Koshioka watched Yamamoto leave, before Tatsumi sighed, in woeful dramatics.
“He’s cute, but sometimes I don’t know what to do with him.”
***
“What’s up?” Eda asked as Yamamoto plopped himself down on the floor next to him, promptly hiding his face in Eda’s shoulder. Hayashi was on Eda’s other side, with Takahashi half sprawled on his lap.
“Nothing,” Yamamoto said, voice muffled by the other’s hoodie, but resurfaced quickly, giving all three a petulant look. If Tatsumi wasn’t going to be any help, THEY Budou was his next best bet. “I need some help.”
Eda gave a hum of acknowledgement and Yamamoto found himself explaining things all over again. “I just… you know, I kind of want him to know that it’s not just an older brother thing. Like… I really like him. But what if it gets weird?” He played with the drawstring of Eda’s hoodie, tugging on it every now and then while he tried to quietly sort his head out.
Nobody needed to ask who he was. There were only so many people Yamamoto obsessively dwelled on.
Actually, there was only one.
“Ah, I was wondering why you were all zombiefied today.” Hayashi was biting back a smile, and Yamamoto was sorely tempted to reach across Eda to hit him before he spoke. “Why so nervous? Isn’t it better to just tell him? That’s what you normally do?”
“But this is different,” Yamamoto insisted vehemently, grimacing.
“Is it any different than that time you got drunk and told him you wanted to sleep with him?” Takahashi pointed out, propping himself up to give Yamamoto a sly smile. “Because I think if Yaracchi’s dealt with that, he can deal with anything.”
“Ryu, shut up,” Yamamoto hissed, looking around in horror. That was an incident that did not need to be repeated, as Yamamoto had been trying to rid it from his brain in mortification for nearly a year now. “And he was drunk too, it’s not like that’s similar at all.”
“I’m with them on this though,” Eda told him, reaching over to brush stray hair away from Yamamoto’s face. “It’s better to tell him, isn’t it?”
“But what if it really is just a little brother-big brother thing…?” Feeling miserable at the prospect, Yamamoto buried his face back in Eda’s shoulder.
“Well, I think if it was just that, he’d have strangled you ages ago, personally,” Ryu’s voice floated to his ears. Hayashi and Eda were both chuckling, and Yamamoto felt childish resentment, peeking up from the material to glower more. His predicament was hardly a laughing matter (even if he knew it really was. He should be done with the teenage blushing romance, wasn’t he?)
“Guuuuuuuys.” But Yamamoto didn’t get a change to protest further, however, because Yara was approaching them. He quickly shut up, face back on Eda’s shoulder.
Yara surveyed the small pile of kids (as Yone referred to them as - his kids, mind you ) and crooked a finger. “Ryouta, c’mere, I need to talk to you.”
Reluctantly, Yamamoto pulled himself to his feet, trying to hide as much of his face behind his hair. It was unnerving how Yara seemed to pop up every time Yamamoto tried to talk about him. Also, Yamamoto was almost positive he was going to get another scolding before they got back to rehearsing. “… Yeah?” he mumbled.
Yara chuckled warmly and Yamamoto’s heard skipped several beats. “Stop sulking, it looks so bad on you.”
“Whaaaat,” Ryouta’s frown merely deepened and he stared at his feet. It was too confusing in his head and he hated that mostly all he wanted to do was pull Yara closer and try kissing him.
Yara sighed, reaching over to tuck Yamamoto’s bangs away from his face. “Look, Ryouta, if you’re feeling under the weather, you have to tell me. I don’t want to push you too hard, but if you won’t say anything, I won’t know when to stop, you know? I trust you to be able to do this, but it’s okay if you need it to slow down today, because pushing too hard will just make tomorrow worse.”
Peeking up, Yamamoto found Yara watching him in concern, and that didn’t do anything to help his heartbeat either. “I’m fine,” he mumbled. Yara’s fingers had been warm against his skin, gentle and caring and everything Yamamoto had wanted.
***
Yamamoto dragged his feet after rehearsal, letting the others slide past him in a blur. He was annoyed at himself for being so hung up on the issue at hand, but at the same time… he knew he couldn’t help it.
If this had just been years ago, back when Yara had just been a cool senpai that danced leagues ahead of Yamamoto, he’d have been fine. An unrequited crush wasn’t so unusual, nor was the strong admiration he had felt for Yara back then.
But this was different. This was deeper and truly personal and it scared Yamamoto. Yara wasn’t just someone he admired. He was a friend, a mentor, an older brother-figure, and someone Yamamoto had fallen deeply in love with.
At first, it had been easy to ignore, but maybe that had been Yamamoto’s mistake. Feelings were, after all, very stupid things. They never did what you wanted them to do and so they’d grown, grown until Yamamoto couldn’t ignore them. He couldn’t ignore the way his stomach flip-flopped when Yara laughed, or how he’d sometimes pause, waiting for Yara to look his way and smile, because that would just make his day. Sometimes he wondered if he was merely deluding himself - Yara was a very friendly person after all - but he wanted to believe that sometimes those eyes softened just for him.
“Yikes,” he said, rubbing his eyes and realizing that most everyone else had left already.
Everyone else except…
“You seem a little lost in thought,” Yara said, leaning against the doorframe, watching Yamamoto in amusement. “I went to grab my bag and you were still here, staring off into space.”
Yamamoto grinned, embarrassed because he wasn’t sure how long he’d stood there, thinking about what it’d be like to go on real dates with Yara and things like holding hands and whatnot. “It’s been a long day,” he said after a bit, diving down to properly gather his stuff up.
“You did better this afternoon,” Yara assured him, warmly. “Now. I was going to take a quick shower and then why don’t you and I go out to dinner.”
“That’d be fun,” Yamamoto said, only half paying attention as he tried to find his sunglasses. “You said you’d show me that new place you really like.”
“… Ryouta,” Yara said after a moment, “I said ‘Why don’t you and I go out to dinner’.” He stressed those two words go out carefully.
“What? I know you did, I was just … Oh.” It took a moment for that to sink in and then Yamamoto was gaping at the man. “Oh.”
“Is that still a yes?” Yara asked with a smile.
Yamamoto made the most unintelligible noise, not sure what to do with his face, his hands, or the bag that had fallen to the ground again, because Yara had just asked him out on a date and he didn’t know exactly how one was supposed to properly proceed with that besides yes and yes.
“You knew?” he squeaked.
Yara’s eyes softened, the way Yamamoto loved and had been hoping would have to do with him. “I guessed. Subtlety was never your strong suit.”
So maybe Tatsumi had been right. Yamamoto could concede to that point, except he wasn’t sure how they’d gotten to this point where Yara was asking him out and knew and understood and things were still okay and he was just all flustered and confused until Yara was right there and kissing him.
It was a soft, sweet kiss. A perfect first kiss, with all the little reassurances Yamamoto had needed. He leaned in, curling his fingers into Yara’s shirt, reveling in the fit and feel of Yara’s mouth against his.
“That is definitely a yes,” he sighed as they pulled away, though he stayed near, not really wanting to let go now that he knew it was okay. Yara didn’t seem to mind at all, settling his arms around Yamamoto’s waist and pressing kisses to his cheek. “Definitely, definitely yes.”
Maybe feelings weren't so stupid after all.
“Shower first,” Yara said, laughing as he walked backwards, taking Yamamoto with him. “Care to join me?”
“Oh god, yes.”