Miscarriage on the 31 yard line!
It could be a football term, right? I know pregnancy loss is a weird thing to joke about, but I figure it's one of those situations where if I stop laughing, I'll start crying again. This, well, sucks. I know that miscarriage is fairly common, and I have plenty of friends who have experienced it. I also know that I've been richly blessed with the children I've already had. That helps ease the blow a little bit. I'm still disappointed - I was looking forward to having another baby, and looking forward to having a summer baby. Now the earliest I can have one would be September.
I had my follow up ultrasound on Friday, and this time, the technician couldn't even see anything inside the sac. It was just a little black blob - a blighted ovum. (Last one in was a rotten egg, I guess.) Basically, the chromosomes inside the fertilized egg were messed up, so even though it implanted and made my body THINK it was pregnant, nothing ever grew. The sac was only ever the size of a lentil.
So, the doctor prescribed me a medication called Cytotec. I'm supposed to use one every 4-6 hours, and it's supposedly going to make this miscarriage actually happen. (Given that my body was happily humming along for several weeks without actually miscarrying, she figured a little jump-start was necessary.) She said that sometimes people end up bleeding a little too much and I could come into the ER if that was the case, and that kind of freaked me out given my history (ie, spontaneous massive hemorrhaging a month after the girls were born), but I figured that it was the weekend, and Orion would be with me the whole time, so I'd be OK if anything scary happened.
Well, guess what. I've used SEVEN of the stupid pills so far, and even though I'm cramping like a mofo, I've seen next to nothing. I'm guessing I'm going to have to end up getting a D&C anyway, which is fine, but if that was going to be the end result I'd rather not have gone through all this cramping torture, you know? If I do get a D&C, it would be on Tuesday.
So, that's my story. I really have no idea how I'm going to take care of the kids tomorrow if I'm still feeling like I did today.
I had my follow up ultrasound on Friday, and this time, the technician couldn't even see anything inside the sac. It was just a little black blob - a blighted ovum. (Last one in was a rotten egg, I guess.) Basically, the chromosomes inside the fertilized egg were messed up, so even though it implanted and made my body THINK it was pregnant, nothing ever grew. The sac was only ever the size of a lentil.
So, the doctor prescribed me a medication called Cytotec. I'm supposed to use one every 4-6 hours, and it's supposedly going to make this miscarriage actually happen. (Given that my body was happily humming along for several weeks without actually miscarrying, she figured a little jump-start was necessary.) She said that sometimes people end up bleeding a little too much and I could come into the ER if that was the case, and that kind of freaked me out given my history (ie, spontaneous massive hemorrhaging a month after the girls were born), but I figured that it was the weekend, and Orion would be with me the whole time, so I'd be OK if anything scary happened.
Well, guess what. I've used SEVEN of the stupid pills so far, and even though I'm cramping like a mofo, I've seen next to nothing. I'm guessing I'm going to have to end up getting a D&C anyway, which is fine, but if that was going to be the end result I'd rather not have gone through all this cramping torture, you know? If I do get a D&C, it would be on Tuesday.
So, that's my story. I really have no idea how I'm going to take care of the kids tomorrow if I'm still feeling like I did today.