Yet another POOR ME POST! *yay*
Wow...I'm seroiusly upset.
I havn't been this upset in a long while and the smallest gesture put me in this pickle.
I was having a Geeeerate evening until I started getting calls from a girl that just recently quit the place I work.
The calls were cool and fun at first, but she called more and more as the night progressed and they got kinda meaner and meaner...even a little attacking.
This is a person I considered more a friend than coworker...that says alot because I generally don't like anyone I work with beyond the front door of the business. I'm very selective on who I talk to at work about my actual life.
I don't want to go into details because it would mean I'd have to type QUITE a fucking bit more but the whole gist of our conversations just went down the drain with me blatantly asking why she was starting to act the way she was.
She just REALLY hurt me, and It is my own damn fault. I opened up and let her inside my life even the tiniest bit and fuck I really regret it. We weren't extremely close or anything really just work acquaintances but it was definitely going towards the next level of friendship....
I don't really understand why I'm as upset as I am. I just am very very very very very (very?) upset right now.
Maybe this is why I don't really have any close friends anymore...maybe this is why I really don't visit anyone anymore except the VERY few people on my friends list that have seen me in the last few months...those 2-3 visits over a 6month period are HUGE amount of time fo rme to spend with anyone other than Shawn.
I remember hanging around people in the Cam, but I ALWAYS kept everyone at a safe distance...they heard and saw the front I put on for them. Is that the way it works for everyone??? Is the whole dramaturgical idea really that realized??
I'm gotta go...I'm depressing myself and I'm upset enough as is.
Sorry for the shitty entry for those of you that bother to read it.
I havn't been this upset in a long while and the smallest gesture put me in this pickle.
I was having a Geeeerate evening until I started getting calls from a girl that just recently quit the place I work.
The calls were cool and fun at first, but she called more and more as the night progressed and they got kinda meaner and meaner...even a little attacking.
This is a person I considered more a friend than coworker...that says alot because I generally don't like anyone I work with beyond the front door of the business. I'm very selective on who I talk to at work about my actual life.
I don't want to go into details because it would mean I'd have to type QUITE a fucking bit more but the whole gist of our conversations just went down the drain with me blatantly asking why she was starting to act the way she was.
She just REALLY hurt me, and It is my own damn fault. I opened up and let her inside my life even the tiniest bit and fuck I really regret it. We weren't extremely close or anything really just work acquaintances but it was definitely going towards the next level of friendship....
I don't really understand why I'm as upset as I am. I just am very very very very very (very?) upset right now.
Maybe this is why I don't really have any close friends anymore...maybe this is why I really don't visit anyone anymore except the VERY few people on my friends list that have seen me in the last few months...those 2-3 visits over a 6month period are HUGE amount of time fo rme to spend with anyone other than Shawn.
I remember hanging around people in the Cam, but I ALWAYS kept everyone at a safe distance...they heard and saw the front I put on for them. Is that the way it works for everyone??? Is the whole dramaturgical idea really that realized??
I'm gotta go...I'm depressing myself and I'm upset enough as is.
Sorry for the shitty entry for those of you that bother to read it.