(no subject)
"Permanence, perseverance and persistence in spite of all obstacles, discouragement, and impossibilities: It is this, that in all things distinguishes the strong soul from the weak" - Thomas Carlyle
Thomas Carlyle said it but I stole the quote from Sarah's LJ. Thanks Sarah!
It made me happy to read that because someone said something today which made me feel really crappy. I'm working in a stables right now so spent the last few days there. Its hard work. Up early, 8 hours spent on your feet, sweeping, lugging buckets of water, shovelling shit, stuffing sacks with hay which doesn't do much for the allergies. Then there's the fun bits when I actually get to lead horses, pick out hooves, groom, put on headcollars... ya know. The animal bits.
Anyways there I am pushing an industrial-sized wheelbarrow full of shite and piss-soaked wood shavings to the muck heap to empty out. It's pretty heavy, and I've spent the last half hour sweeping the yard which was rather painful on my back. So I get to the muck heap and then wonder how the hell I'm going to empty this pile of crap out of the barrow, because its really BIG. One of the bigshot manager dudes comes up (actually he DRIVES up, in a little miniature pick-up full of shit- no pushing for him) and sees the bunch of us at the muck heap. He asks "so who's the veterinary student?" I'm there struggling away looking like a complete tool probably, and I say "me". And he says "you might want to get some muscle-building lessons then." and speeds off in his little fucking golf-car.
Wow. I am nineteen years old. With my exam results, I could have done most courses, but I chose vet. Its the last week of my goddamn summer holidays and I am spending 8 hours of every day that week in his goddamn stables shoveling his goddamn horse shit for FREE and he has the gall to tell me I need to be stronger.
I am doing this to get where I want to be. I am doing this because that is what I have to do get there. I will do what it takes to prove to him and all the piece of shit bastards out there that you can be a girl, and go to school in Killiney, and be a goddamn nerd and you can still succeed. And I will and I will push myself as far as it takes for as long as it takes and eventually I'll prove something to someone. I dunno what or who really. I just don't want to fail, I don't want to be weak.
I'm twenty in about 22 hours. Its weird. I feel lie the best times have come and gone and I didn't even notice. I feel like there'll never be such times again. Now it's all uphill. Now I have the great benefit of experience making me bitter and cynical. Think this is why I wanna do well in vet so much. Its something I can make work. If I'm strong, like whats-his-name (quote dude) said. So hopefully... not hopefully. Definitely. I'll do it.
Thomas Carlyle said it but I stole the quote from Sarah's LJ. Thanks Sarah!
It made me happy to read that because someone said something today which made me feel really crappy. I'm working in a stables right now so spent the last few days there. Its hard work. Up early, 8 hours spent on your feet, sweeping, lugging buckets of water, shovelling shit, stuffing sacks with hay which doesn't do much for the allergies. Then there's the fun bits when I actually get to lead horses, pick out hooves, groom, put on headcollars... ya know. The animal bits.
Anyways there I am pushing an industrial-sized wheelbarrow full of shite and piss-soaked wood shavings to the muck heap to empty out. It's pretty heavy, and I've spent the last half hour sweeping the yard which was rather painful on my back. So I get to the muck heap and then wonder how the hell I'm going to empty this pile of crap out of the barrow, because its really BIG. One of the bigshot manager dudes comes up (actually he DRIVES up, in a little miniature pick-up full of shit- no pushing for him) and sees the bunch of us at the muck heap. He asks "so who's the veterinary student?" I'm there struggling away looking like a complete tool probably, and I say "me". And he says "you might want to get some muscle-building lessons then." and speeds off in his little fucking golf-car.
Wow. I am nineteen years old. With my exam results, I could have done most courses, but I chose vet. Its the last week of my goddamn summer holidays and I am spending 8 hours of every day that week in his goddamn stables shoveling his goddamn horse shit for FREE and he has the gall to tell me I need to be stronger.
I am doing this to get where I want to be. I am doing this because that is what I have to do get there. I will do what it takes to prove to him and all the piece of shit bastards out there that you can be a girl, and go to school in Killiney, and be a goddamn nerd and you can still succeed. And I will and I will push myself as far as it takes for as long as it takes and eventually I'll prove something to someone. I dunno what or who really. I just don't want to fail, I don't want to be weak.
I'm twenty in about 22 hours. Its weird. I feel lie the best times have come and gone and I didn't even notice. I feel like there'll never be such times again. Now it's all uphill. Now I have the great benefit of experience making me bitter and cynical. Think this is why I wanna do well in vet so much. Its something I can make work. If I'm strong, like whats-his-name (quote dude) said. So hopefully... not hopefully. Definitely. I'll do it.