Faith and Why
What does it mean to have faith? I've been asking myself that question alot lately. I'm not sure I really understand faith. I know there is a God and I occasionally pray. I believe in Jesus' sacrifice and know that all one has to do is ask forgiveness and repent, but do these things represent faith? In my life I have had many wonderful things happen, but I've also had many terrible pains. Many of you know that my pains have recently outweighed the good things. Why? Before I go further, I want to make it clear that I do not feel sorry for myself. I have seen suffering far beyond my own and know that there are others who are in far greater pain, so I understand that my bouts with companionship and love do not weigh heavy in the grand scheme of things. Why are so many around me showered with good fortune in love? Why is it that someone, who desires loving companionship beyond all else, made to be alone? I have heard so many people telling me to be patient. I understand patience and I know that I should be patient, but at the same time I wonder why patience is necessary. How long did the people in the bondage of Egypt wait?...why? Where is the divine love that I so need to comfort me now? If not a companion of flesh, then why not one of the spirit? If I am to have patience and wait for my "other" then why will God not fill my with peace until then? I read a book last night called "Encounters with God" in which people shared stories about how their mundane lives took new meaning after they had an "encounter" with God. Some were stories of answered prayers, others were stories of miracles and as I read I actually became agitated. I wondered...where is my answered prayer, or where is my miracle. Now many of you would interpret that as selfish, but the kickers is that the majority of my prayers are not for myself but for others that need God's presence. I have asked only a few things for myself.
1. That my family be kept safe and healthy
2. That my friends and their families be kept safe and healthy
3. That God please bring me the love of the woman that will be my wife.
Is that really so much to ask? He blesses people everyday with the gift of love and happiness. I have a close friend who is atheist and he recently found the love of his life and is now moving in with her. If someone who shuns God entirely blessed, then why can't I be? What lesson is there to be taught here? Why?!
1. That my family be kept safe and healthy
2. That my friends and their families be kept safe and healthy
3. That God please bring me the love of the woman that will be my wife.
Is that really so much to ask? He blesses people everyday with the gift of love and happiness. I have a close friend who is atheist and he recently found the love of his life and is now moving in with her. If someone who shuns God entirely blessed, then why can't I be? What lesson is there to be taught here? Why?!