(no subject)
I've noticed that, over the course of my membership to LiveJournal, that some people find it necessary to put my life on trial by only visiting my journal waiting for a moment to pounce.
I don't have this problem with just one person, but with as many as four right now, some I used to be friends with who bowed out of my life for various reasons long ago, some who are looking for me to slip up and some strangers who have heard a thing or two from a biased person. They all have the same thing in common -- they are looking for a fight. If I say nothing about it, they stand by and read my journal until something rubs them the wrong way for whatever reason they can justify in their twisted minds. But do they mention it to me directly? No, they either stock-pile it until I get them a forum in which to speak (i.e. - anonymous comment memes) OR leave anonymous comments only after another person has decided to attack me ("Lets gang up on her. If someone is as mad at her as I am I must be right about her!"). If I point any of this out in my journal, responding in my defense, I am immature and dramatic. I may never say their names, I may not even be talking who they think I am, but for whatever reason, they believe they are an important part of my life when they are not. Judging me and offering me ill-conceived "advice" when you aren't even a part of my life is absurd. To attack me and cry fowl when I don't roll over and die is equally absurd.
If you can't take my logical responses to your illogical attacks, then, you have multiple options: 1.) Don't bother saying anything to anyone. This is what a paper journal or your therapist is for. If I'm getting under your skin enough that you're stock-piling things, then, it is you alone who has to deal with that. Don't punish other people (i.e. - my friends and loyal readers) for it. 2.) And this is a big one...YOU CAN STOP READING MY JOURNAL. If you are above me, have a problem with the way I live my life or have a twisted negative view of who I am, you can forget I exist. It's that easy! Why would you willingly torture yourself by continuing to read something that pisses you off so much? 3.) You can deal with me head-on. As in, send me an e-mail identifying yourself and what your issues are and not get mad when I respond in defense of myself. You can stop spamming my LiveJournal with anonymous comments because you like the drama but don't want anyone, including me, to know who you are.
Some people think that I believe I'm better than everyone else. Well, I don't. It's called confidence, and just because you're insecure, doesn't mean that the rest of us have to be. Some people have even taken a swing at my parenting skills, which is something they couldn't possibly know about me. They assume that because my life is busy that I somehow neglect my responsibilities as a parent. Well, I don't. It is because I am able to maintain all of my responsibilities, parenting and otherwise, that I am a successful adult. And really...some people are just jealous. How many people come here to take a swing at my modeling by telling me I believe I'm better at it than I am? When have I ever said how good or bad I consider myself to be? I've only ever said that I'm evolving and that I'm working a lot more at it these days. But yet -- people believe that I do it to make others mad, that I lie about it despite the level of proof plastered all over the Internet for the world to see or that I am trying to become the next Bettie Page (HA!).
How sad and silly it is to believe that you people have any affect on the life at all! You can hate me all you want, but what does that do? You can't change anything about me. And to say that what I say here is anything but the truth is ridiculous given the number of real life friends on my list who would more than gladly speak up if I were really trying to pull the wool over anyone's eyes. I don't make it a habit to be friends with people who can't think for themselves. I don't expect them to always agree with me, but I am open and candid about my life with them, and they are an active part of my life outside of the Internet as well as here. Whoa -- outside of the Internet. That's some scary territory there, right haters? How many of you same people would walk up to me on the street and say the absurd nonsense you spew forth here to my face? I'd been willing to bet that none of you would.
So, I've started logging IP addresses again, and I'm considering making my journal friends only. If not the whole journal, at least commenting. I'm also considering a name change. So, good luck with the hate brigade, but I'm doing my part to eliminate the clutter that exists here. This is and has always been my personal haven. Unless I'm saying "Joe Smith is a creepy asshole who kills children" then you have no reason to assume who I'm talking about and with what context. You can't fault me for venting about the stupid things people try to do to me on my journal. This is a journal, after all. And for all of the people who have accused me of starting drama or not having a life or whatever other "original" thoughts, I'd take a long, hard look in the mirror. I haven't "started drama" with anyone in a long fucking time, and even then, I was justified in doing so (usually because they actually did something to me). I don't think that I can fault you for checking in from time to time, but I can get upset when I'm attacked for faulty reasons.
I am not perfect. I've never claimed to be without the capacity to make mistakes. But the fact of the matter is that I've grown up a lot in the past few years, and this stuff is not important enough for me to indulge. If I'm happy, people think I'm bragging. If I'm sad, people think I'm looking for attention. If something bad happens to me, people think I deserve it. But you know what it comes down to? I don't live to please or appease anyone.
I am a 27-year-old married woman with a child and a two careers. Do you really think I'd put so much energy into fretting about you?
I don't have this problem with just one person, but with as many as four right now, some I used to be friends with who bowed out of my life for various reasons long ago, some who are looking for me to slip up and some strangers who have heard a thing or two from a biased person. They all have the same thing in common -- they are looking for a fight. If I say nothing about it, they stand by and read my journal until something rubs them the wrong way for whatever reason they can justify in their twisted minds. But do they mention it to me directly? No, they either stock-pile it until I get them a forum in which to speak (i.e. - anonymous comment memes) OR leave anonymous comments only after another person has decided to attack me ("Lets gang up on her. If someone is as mad at her as I am I must be right about her!"). If I point any of this out in my journal, responding in my defense, I am immature and dramatic. I may never say their names, I may not even be talking who they think I am, but for whatever reason, they believe they are an important part of my life when they are not. Judging me and offering me ill-conceived "advice" when you aren't even a part of my life is absurd. To attack me and cry fowl when I don't roll over and die is equally absurd.
If you can't take my logical responses to your illogical attacks, then, you have multiple options: 1.) Don't bother saying anything to anyone. This is what a paper journal or your therapist is for. If I'm getting under your skin enough that you're stock-piling things, then, it is you alone who has to deal with that. Don't punish other people (i.e. - my friends and loyal readers) for it. 2.) And this is a big one...YOU CAN STOP READING MY JOURNAL. If you are above me, have a problem with the way I live my life or have a twisted negative view of who I am, you can forget I exist. It's that easy! Why would you willingly torture yourself by continuing to read something that pisses you off so much? 3.) You can deal with me head-on. As in, send me an e-mail identifying yourself and what your issues are and not get mad when I respond in defense of myself. You can stop spamming my LiveJournal with anonymous comments because you like the drama but don't want anyone, including me, to know who you are.
Some people think that I believe I'm better than everyone else. Well, I don't. It's called confidence, and just because you're insecure, doesn't mean that the rest of us have to be. Some people have even taken a swing at my parenting skills, which is something they couldn't possibly know about me. They assume that because my life is busy that I somehow neglect my responsibilities as a parent. Well, I don't. It is because I am able to maintain all of my responsibilities, parenting and otherwise, that I am a successful adult. And really...some people are just jealous. How many people come here to take a swing at my modeling by telling me I believe I'm better at it than I am? When have I ever said how good or bad I consider myself to be? I've only ever said that I'm evolving and that I'm working a lot more at it these days. But yet -- people believe that I do it to make others mad, that I lie about it despite the level of proof plastered all over the Internet for the world to see or that I am trying to become the next Bettie Page (HA!).
How sad and silly it is to believe that you people have any affect on the life at all! You can hate me all you want, but what does that do? You can't change anything about me. And to say that what I say here is anything but the truth is ridiculous given the number of real life friends on my list who would more than gladly speak up if I were really trying to pull the wool over anyone's eyes. I don't make it a habit to be friends with people who can't think for themselves. I don't expect them to always agree with me, but I am open and candid about my life with them, and they are an active part of my life outside of the Internet as well as here. Whoa -- outside of the Internet. That's some scary territory there, right haters? How many of you same people would walk up to me on the street and say the absurd nonsense you spew forth here to my face? I'd been willing to bet that none of you would.
So, I've started logging IP addresses again, and I'm considering making my journal friends only. If not the whole journal, at least commenting. I'm also considering a name change. So, good luck with the hate brigade, but I'm doing my part to eliminate the clutter that exists here. This is and has always been my personal haven. Unless I'm saying "Joe Smith is a creepy asshole who kills children" then you have no reason to assume who I'm talking about and with what context. You can't fault me for venting about the stupid things people try to do to me on my journal. This is a journal, after all. And for all of the people who have accused me of starting drama or not having a life or whatever other "original" thoughts, I'd take a long, hard look in the mirror. I haven't "started drama" with anyone in a long fucking time, and even then, I was justified in doing so (usually because they actually did something to me). I don't think that I can fault you for checking in from time to time, but I can get upset when I'm attacked for faulty reasons.
I am not perfect. I've never claimed to be without the capacity to make mistakes. But the fact of the matter is that I've grown up a lot in the past few years, and this stuff is not important enough for me to indulge. If I'm happy, people think I'm bragging. If I'm sad, people think I'm looking for attention. If something bad happens to me, people think I deserve it. But you know what it comes down to? I don't live to please or appease anyone.
I am a 27-year-old married woman with a child and a two careers. Do you really think I'd put so much energy into fretting about you?