(no subject)
Everything has been so action, action, action lately.
It is always good when you are moving and learning, growing, having fun, but still maintaining. Just before I skip away in three weeks, would I like to have a sweet memory with all of my wonderful, close friends. Despite all the anger and confusion between some of us, it would be incredible to have a final love touch from all of the people I have held so deep in my heart.
My body is achy, sticky, shaky. I can smell the alcohol seeping out of each pore, and the hair on my head reeks of cigarette smoke. Drinking on anti-depressants is no good, and I know this...so why then, why Rhonda? For my brain, my organs, my health, I really should just cut the shit out. I plan to tweak this aspect of my life the most when I leave. The free gym, olympic size swimming pool, soccer fields, and the ocean should be enough for me. I do not want to be confused about long nights, and black thoughts. A goal I have been contemplating for a while is going on the women's pro longboard tour, visit the world and make some new friends that share the common love and interest for the ocean. I hope to train hard, and get my mind focused on school work while surfing as much as possible. Then, hopefully, after two years I will be on tour. Fortunately, there are only a couple contests that I would need to surf each tour, maybe five or six, and all of the locations are in California, Costa, and one in France!
I have this broken hearted love sick dream for all of you, but it is so confusing that only a hard pulled stream of consciousness would allow it to flow freely.
It is fun wanting something you know you cannot have for one reason or another. Too bad I want someone, not something. I feel a flash coming on, a wet t-shirt contest, and naked me in the middle of a party. Now, someone has taken my clothes. I wish it was simple, but nothing good ever is, so I will deal. I wish you would ask me to play cards more often.
It is always good when you are moving and learning, growing, having fun, but still maintaining. Just before I skip away in three weeks, would I like to have a sweet memory with all of my wonderful, close friends. Despite all the anger and confusion between some of us, it would be incredible to have a final love touch from all of the people I have held so deep in my heart.
My body is achy, sticky, shaky. I can smell the alcohol seeping out of each pore, and the hair on my head reeks of cigarette smoke. Drinking on anti-depressants is no good, and I know this...so why then, why Rhonda? For my brain, my organs, my health, I really should just cut the shit out. I plan to tweak this aspect of my life the most when I leave. The free gym, olympic size swimming pool, soccer fields, and the ocean should be enough for me. I do not want to be confused about long nights, and black thoughts. A goal I have been contemplating for a while is going on the women's pro longboard tour, visit the world and make some new friends that share the common love and interest for the ocean. I hope to train hard, and get my mind focused on school work while surfing as much as possible. Then, hopefully, after two years I will be on tour. Fortunately, there are only a couple contests that I would need to surf each tour, maybe five or six, and all of the locations are in California, Costa, and one in France!
I have this broken hearted love sick dream for all of you, but it is so confusing that only a hard pulled stream of consciousness would allow it to flow freely.
It is fun wanting something you know you cannot have for one reason or another. Too bad I want someone, not something. I feel a flash coming on, a wet t-shirt contest, and naked me in the middle of a party. Now, someone has taken my clothes. I wish it was simple, but nothing good ever is, so I will deal. I wish you would ask me to play cards more often.