so over it
right now, im so over everything, people who i thought were my friends, arent, im pissed that my parents cant act like my parents, sad because i think my sister is getting irritated at me staying here, and annoyed cuz i dont understand why at times i can be so unwanted by people. i dont think im a bad person, im a sure as hell a good friend, im always there for people whenever i can be, i always listen to people, even when my shit is going up in smoke, so why this feeling of being incomplete? i know i have some friends out there,that actually do care, but why i do i feel like.. im not really liked? i mean is it just some act everyone puts on? a front? nice to me to my face, and once i turn my back, the talking begins? im trying to be up beat.. trying to look at my situation with light, but when i look at the facts.. im fucked.. and im really trying to not let it get to me.. there is one person that i was really adamant about being friends with, but they just dont seem so into it.. maybe we are just too different to be friends.. i dont really know.. im just really depressed right now.. and dunno what to do.. *sighs* i just need someone to talk to.. not someone who is worried just cuz of what happened, i want someone to talk to, that i know really cares about me.. and really wants to listen. that person will probably be michael, cuz he has always been there and i know he loves me to death, as i love him to death, he is one of my best friends. anyway.. its late.. and im just.. frustrated and cant sleep..