(no subject)
-sigh-
in a terrible mood
dad called and cancelled on me
in a terrible lifetime movie style, just as i was wrapping his christmas present
he doesnt have enough money, as usual
has like 25 bucks to live on for the week and cant afford gas and tolls and dinner
so... i mean.... whatever
these things do happen
im also upset because i gained a pound
i know thats like ridiculous and stupid
but i feel like the ground is tipping under me, and losing control even that much is upsetting me
i guess thats some eating disorder shit
but obviously i dont have one so it doesnt matter
i just want to feel comfortable in clothing again, instead of hiding myself under sweatshirts constantly
so i need to get my shit together
okay im babbling about nothing important
im just upset
and he was like "oh i promise ill come in april to finally visit you at school"
but im smart enough to know thats never going to fucking happen
i will be blasted into space if he shows up at graduation, let alone on some random april day
i have an eye appointment tomorrow, which erases the last of my plans from being able to happen
so, i guess thats it for the most part
the cars in for inspection today
dad never showed
i could leave wednesday if i wanted to
so... idk... maybe i will
in a terrible mood
dad called and cancelled on me
in a terrible lifetime movie style, just as i was wrapping his christmas present
he doesnt have enough money, as usual
has like 25 bucks to live on for the week and cant afford gas and tolls and dinner
so... i mean.... whatever
these things do happen
im also upset because i gained a pound
i know thats like ridiculous and stupid
but i feel like the ground is tipping under me, and losing control even that much is upsetting me
i guess thats some eating disorder shit
but obviously i dont have one so it doesnt matter
i just want to feel comfortable in clothing again, instead of hiding myself under sweatshirts constantly
so i need to get my shit together
okay im babbling about nothing important
im just upset
and he was like "oh i promise ill come in april to finally visit you at school"
but im smart enough to know thats never going to fucking happen
i will be blasted into space if he shows up at graduation, let alone on some random april day
i have an eye appointment tomorrow, which erases the last of my plans from being able to happen
so, i guess thats it for the most part
the cars in for inspection today
dad never showed
i could leave wednesday if i wanted to
so... idk... maybe i will