I thought the desert air was supposed to be healthful…
And yet, my head cold rages on.
We made it. Grandma is still grandma, if flakier and more frail. Nothing unexpected - she’ll be 87 in a week and has never had a healthy habit in her life. The fact that she is still alive is amazing, though I would have to say that one good fall with a broken bone, and she’d be toast. In talking w/Sharyn it’s agreed all around that the “caregiving crew that can’t be called caregivers” needs to be expanded and we’ll be working on that. The biggest problem is when she is alone, no one gets any peace. Whenever something pops into her head, she goes to the phone - it’s a pure reflex at this point for her, not a conscious decision, which results in her making everyone else crazy.
This is probably also the last Christmas she’ll have any clue who we are. Kinda sad, but again, hardly unexpected. I’d say it could be her last Christmas here on earth, but we’ve been saying that for the last 10 years.
The calendar says it’s Christmas Eve, but you couldn’t prove it by me - the biggest downer of being here at Christmas is that it has never, ever felt anything like Christmas. Everything that makes Christmas what it is to me is back home, not here. So, that part fairly well sucks, but it is what it is. (And though I have fears to the contrary, my grandmother will not live forever and I’ll have many years of finally doing Christmas my way. Just not this year.)
On the upside, we have made a few brilliant decisions this trip. The first being the hotel. (Mad props to my brother for coming up with this idea in the first place.) We’re at the Renaissance Grand over in Glendale, and it’s really nice. It’s right next to the town center which has a bucketload of restaurants, the hockey arena and a movie theater - and people under the age of 60. And given that it doesn’t seem that Phoenix is a big Christmas destination, we got a really good deal on the room to boot.
The second brilliant decision was in making the travel days separate from any interaction with my grandmother. (This comes from my last trip out here.) It may sound harsh, but I can deal with US Airways, or my grandmother, but not both in the same day. Just isn’t going to work.
Last but not least - deciding to fly out of Dulles instead of National. Amazing how when you decide you will take flights that are convienent for YOU and not anyone else, things are a lot easier. I hadn’t flown out of Dulles in 10 years and I was blown away at how much better it is than National. Between having many hours in the morning to get the pets to the kennel (*sob*) and not having to take a death cab to the metro and fight with that ridiculousness (and I’m not even sure our metro station was open) and deal with the service impaired folks at National - it was actually a stress free travel day.
I’m still kicking myself a bit for the length of this trip - we could probably leave day after tomorrow and it wouldn’t make a difference at all in my grandmother’s mind. But her shrieks of “you won’t be here long enough to get everything done!” from years past kept ringing in my ears as I made the reservations… Ah well, lessons learned. (I think I’ll have it all figured out about a week after she dies. If she ever dies.)
Originally posted at CafeChatNoir.net.
Permalink - click to comment!
