Only One (2/3)
Title: Only One
Rating: NC-15
Pairing/characters: JongKey, Jonghyun, Key
Genre: fictional, fluff, unhappiness
Word count: 17,169
Summary: They had only saw each other in their eyes. They had only let each other convince them life was great. They had only got to love each other. At that time . . . Life was truly great.
They’d go somewhere every Sunday and no, it wasn’t some church.
(It’s not like they’d let them in, anyway.)
Jonghyun had dressed semi-formally, wearing a white shirt and black pants, leaving all his bracelets and accessories he barely even wore behind and took his guitar, slinging it over his back before going to Key’s house.
It wasn’t sunny out but neither was it cloudy. It was just a pretty typical day for a Sunday.
He put his hands in his pockets, making his way to Key’s, watching everyone walking around the pathway.
There were kids with both parents, swinging their hands together. Laughing. Happy.
Jonghyun bitterly smiled.
He looked away, nonetheless.
He stared at the ground, watching his steps at he let his mind wander.
It must’ve been wonderful to have parents by your side.
His father kicked him out a year ago for his behavior without any regret-and he hadn’t heard from him since. He was no longer in contact with him and he was pretty glad about it. Life without him was a whole lot better. Hard, but so much better.
He crossed a few streets and looked up, coming upon a small neighborhood that Key had lived in.
They were going to go see his mother today.
Like every Sunday.
Like a good son should.
He looked around the small neighborhood, smiling to the merry as he examined each house’s personally. One never looked the same-not in structure and not even in color. It was like whoever had lived in the house decided to completely stick out their individuality.
This neighborhood was the description of his boyfriend.
He hoisted his guitar back up as his feet pressed onward on the street, taking a gradual turn, meeting his house in the culdesac.
He remembered how Key always complained he wanted to paint the house pink; but his mother refused. Key would grumble on about how he had to negotiate on a color that wasn’t even as pretty as pink-pastel mint green.
Jonghyun chuckled to himself when he recalled the tone of pique stained in Key’s voice as he’d once ran a hand over the paint job.
Since he wasn’t happy with the color, Key made another negotiation. If they painted the house pastel mint green, Key could paint whatever he wanted on the walls.
Jonghyun didn’t know how his mother even coped with accepting it.
He walked up the yard, not giving a thought about going to the front door. Instead, he visited the side of the house, his eyes wandering all over the wall.
On both sides of the house, Key painted a pair of blue wings with the accent of purples over it. The wings were person-less in the middle, starting in blank space.
His eyes went further down as the wings stretched to the far end, the design so realistic when discarding the color.
They colors of purples and blues softly mixed together, accenting the close detailing that didn’t just make simple wing a first grade could, but details that the work of a skilled artist had.
It didn’t match the wall whatsoever from the color all the way to the actual drawing of the wings.
But it matched the artist Key, so he absolutely knew these wings were the best in the world (or him just being super dedicated to his boyfriend).
His hand slowly ran down the free space between the wings.
Key could fit in the middle . . .
“Why are you over there again?”
Startled, Jonghyun jumped back, his gaze meeting Key-his fashion sense mirroring his own.
He smiled warmly like he hadn’t in years and came closer, immediately grasping on to his hand and leading them back out the cheery place.
“You didn’t answer my question,” Key reminded, flicking a part of his bangs to the side as he stared at the space before them.
Jonghyun’s stomach bubbled as if he were caught red-handed doing something wrong. He chuckled, fighting off his stupid senses, “Those wings . . . again.”
“Again?” Key chuckled, “How many times do you plan on looking at them? They’re the same every day.”
Jonghyun quickly objected, shaking his head, denying, “Nope. Every day there’s something different about those wings. Today . . . Today I noticed how the spot in between each wing . . . That space could fit you . . . I wonder, should we ever take a picture?”
Key’s face slightly blushed as he turned his head away, faking a scoff, “Me with purple wings, yeah right.”
“I want a picture of it.”
Key looked back at Jonghyun, a sheepish smile playing on his lips, “Fine.”
Jonghyun’s heart fluttered madly and childishly swung their hands in excitement.
“Ah! We’re going to see my mom today!” he sang.
Key chuckled and participated in swinging their hands, giving Jonghyun a jerk whenever they were actually supposed to take a turn and the older one forgot to.
They talked among the way casually, unimportant conversation to just pass the time.
Well, it always intrigued Jonghyun; it was Key for crying out loud.
The sidewalk soon turned into a parking lot, and Jonghyun took a once over of the building, smiling as he pulled Key inside.
He paid no mind to anyone around them and entered an empty elevator, pressing the floor and leaning his arm on the wall.
He watched Key smile beside him. Key very well knew how much Jonghyun couldn’t get enough of his favorite parent ever. Even though they did the same thing every Sunday, it was like the first time.
The elevator opened and they escaped the bad elevator music, casually making to his mother’s room without weird glances.
Jonghyun was prepared to greet his mother with the biggest smile on his face until he cut short-she wasn’t even in her room.
He then rolled his eyes with a scoff, turning back around and asking one of the nurses for her location.
“On the roof,” she simply answered.
He nodded, clutching Key’s hand tighter and going back to the doorway to the stairs and taking flight from there.
Key groaned but didn’t necessarily complain. It made Jonghyun laugh.
There weren’t too many steps to call the trip bothersome, but he knew on the inside that Key was dying. He was just keeping it to himself because they were visiting his mother.
They reached the roof, seeing that it wasn’t only his mother up there, but many more patients that decided they wanted some fresh air and see the city.
He looked around, trying to identify which one should be his mom. It was hard because all women her age had the same hairstyle.
Key tapped on his shoulder, catching his attention and putting over to a bench that a lonesome woman sat on. Once Jonghyun laid eyes on her, he knew exactly who it was.
He dragged Key along, energetic and skipping to his mother until he ended up at her side, “Mom!”
The woman looked up from her gaze at the city, a smile falling upon her lips that always made her look younger than she really was.
“Jonghyun! Kibum-ah!” she exclaimed, patting the seats next to her, “Right on time, like always. Sit!”
Jonghyun nodded as Key bowed-she teasingly scolded him for being so formal when he shouldn’t.
“So, how are you two doing?” she asked, holding Jonghyun’s hand in hers, “Ah, you two look so dashing as always.”
“Great!” Jonghyun exclaimed, biting his lips, “Perfect!”
He heard Key chuckled and blushed, realizing he sounded more like a toddler learning words than a grown young adult. It wasn’t like he planned on using complicated words.
She grinned from ear to ear, nodding, “How’ve you been, Kibum-ah?”
“The same,” he shrugged, “How’ve you been, mom?”
In-laws, Jonghyun thought.
“I wouldn’t lie, so I’d say I could do better. But, you two are here now, that’s all that matters right now.”
Jonghyun’s face slightly fell and his mother saw, giving his hand a weak squeeze.
Jonghyun regained posture quickly, sloppily bringing out his guitar and making a soft strum to make sure he wasn’t disturbing anyone, “I wrote another song, mom.”
“It’s another one about Kibum, isn’t it?” she chuckled, patting him on the cheek before reaching over for Key’s hand, forcing him to get up and bring him to the other side of her, “It seems he’s solely your inspiration. Doesn’t it seem so, Kibum?”
Key blushed heavily and nodded in agreement. She patted his hand and held it close to her, looking at Jonghyun expectantly, “Well let’s hear it.”
Jonghyun nodded, breathing out before he started another strum.
It was the last lap they had to run for the day and Key couldn’t be anymore than glad.
He hated gym period-it was filled with nasty human beings and sweaty bodies that smelled awful. Of course when he sweats, he only smelled of sweet scents, so he couldn’t put the blame on himself.
His legs were aching and his lungs were on fire and ready to combust.
He made a last turn, seemingly lasting forever with the speed he went. He never thought he was out of shape, but apparently his stamina was trying to prove something to him.
The sun beat down on his skin and he felt uncomfortable-he was going to get sunburned and then he’d have a reason to yell at the teacher for not letting him put his products on his face for extra protection.
He took his last few steps before falling to his knees, huffing to catch his breath. If the gym teacher made him do this again, he swore he was going to kill him.
The sun rays stung his back and he was about to try crawling away to get out of its way. If he stood outside any longer, he swore he was going to burn to ash with a screeching cry.
“Go back inside, guys,” the gym teacher shrugged, gesturing for everyone to follow him.
He had his back turned and a few followed the teacher. His friend, Taemin, stayed by Key’s side until the elder told him to go first, afraid Taemin might get heat stroke easily if he lagged behind with him.
Others had stayed behind, catching their breaths as they tried taunting Key.
“Can the fag stand?” an unfamiliar voice teased as it took a large inhale, “Or does the fag need Jonghyun to pick him up?”
Key kept quiet, slowly standing on his feet and ignoring the boys as he left on wobbly legs. He wasn’t insulted but he was surely agitated. These people had the same comments every day to the point that they were just words repeating on a broken record. Too many times they’ve said the same thing and now it was just annoying to listen to.
He walked away with dignity, unlike the others who were stepping on his heels
“Aw,” a different voice mocked, “Can little Kibum not take a joke?”
Key scoffed, crossing his arms and arrogantly walked away.
He didn’t understand why people still had to make a big fuss over him and Jonghyun since they started two years ago. Did it never get old? What did these people do with their lives?
“C’mon,” that same voice went on, “Talk to us, Kibum. Girls like to do that.”
“Fuck off,” he threatened.
The boys behind him all gave him the cliché ‘ooh!’ like they were back in middle school when someone was in trouble as they got closer to the building.
“Faggot’s feistier than I thought,” the guy chuckled tugging his arm, “C’mon.”
Key spun and roughly pushed the tall guy-he was one of Jonghyun’s old friends-on the chest, “Don’t call me that! Go find someone else to pester.”
He realized there were more boys behind him than he thought.
Where was that damn teacher now?
“But that’s your name, isn’t it?” he smirked in defiance, “I can’t do anything about that when it clearly describes who you are. What do people like you say? Oh, right. You should embrace it.”
Key shoved him again, his eyes sharply pulling to all the others-there had to be about six more, “If it were up to me, you’re so much worse than that. Leave me the hell alone.”
He inched closer again and Key was so done with this that he straight up slapped him across the face, “Don’t you dare gain the audacity to try anything, I swear.”
He turned on his heels, walking close to entrance before he was roughly grabbed by the wrist and slammed his back on the wall. The assaulter’s fingers wrapped around the top of Key’s shirt, balling into a fist.
He nearly shook, understanding that the guy was easily ticked off and now he was going to get it.
“Get the fuck off!” he growled, trying to pry the bully’s fingers from his shirt.
“No, you listen, you gay delinquent-”
Even though it wasn’t the right time to, Kibum couldn’t help but to snort in his mind.
Using such a big word for a tiny brain.
“-Don’t you ever touch me. You’re asking for serious problems, now,” he shook him, Key’s back roughly hitting the wall each shake.
“Knock some sense into him,” one of them suggested, raising his brows.
The bully smirked, biting the side of his lower lip with nod, “Maybe I should.”
“Don’t. Touch. Me.” Key tried retaliating, but to no avail.
Key never thought it would come to this point. Through the years, it was only cruel words. Here and there, there were shoves and hitting on his back, but never the face.
The attacker raised his fist and Key began quivering.
When did he deserve this abuse? What did he do wrong?
Where the hell was this teacher?!
His grasped on to the fist clutching his shirt and desperately trying to move him away, wanting to avoid the hit.
The attacker’s friends cheered it on behind him, smiling like little demons watching the devil take a prey.
The guy’s fist rose higher, soon enough swinging close to his face.
Key’s natural instinct was to shut his eyes and tense for the blow. He had no escape from this.
The fist came hard on his left cheek, the blow forcing his whole body to jerk right, but the grasp on his shirt held him.
Key cried out, pulling a hand to his cheek, tensing when he touched it, feeling how tender it had became easily.
He was hit over and over on the same cheek, crying out louder each time in pain.
It was like the hits weren’t going to end. He could just feel the bruise growing bigger and uglier each time the fist came back. He couldn’t totally focus on the pain, but also focusing on how bad his face looked.
Tears fell from his eyes and his face grew hot with embarrassment that he couldn’t even stand up for himself.
“You shouldn’t exist,” the guy hissed, “You were born to be a mistake. You took away one of my friends and got him confused. You’re a filthy, gross, dirty-”
He was cut off and Key was jerked to the left a little, falling to his knees as his shirt was released. He held on to his left cheek, sniffing hard before trying to open his eyes-closing his left because it hurt too much.
He stared out of his right eye, seeing the familiar dinosaur structure standing over the bully on the ground, clutching his shirt and shaking him vigorously, his head hitting the ground hard each time.
“What do you think you’re doing?” Jonghyun spat at his ex-friend, a quivering fist colliding with the boy in his hold.
The attacker moved his mouth around, scrunching his nose to check if anything was severely injured, “What does it look like I’m doing, Jonghyun?”
Jonghyun hit him again and Key cringed at his violence.
“It looks like you were hitting my boyfriend, that’s what it look like!” he growled, punching him square in the jaw without a thought.
Key trembled as he watched Jonghyun’s nostrils flare and eyes burning right into the assaulter’s.
The watchers slowly stepped back from the fight, quietly making their way into the gym.
The boy wheezed as Jonghyun refused stopping, letting out all his anger on the guy.
“You really thought you were gonna get away with it?” he screamed at him, “Even if he never told me about it, you really think this would be kept a secret? Damn, you are so wrong!”
Key coward speechlessly as Jonghyun beat on his old friend, each hit making him go further into unconsciousness.
Jonghyun didn’t seem to notice his victim’s lack of reaction, keeping his fist of fury going.
When Key could see the blood running from he guy’s nose and mouth in abundance, he couldn’t stay frozen any longer.
He crawled over, immediately putting a hand on Jonghyun’s flexed arm to stop him.
Jonghyun’s head sharply turned and a fist started coming his way. Key flinched, shrinking as he closed his eyes.
“K-Key,” Jonghyun breathed, the hit never coming, “Shit, Key.”
He hesitantly opened his eye, seeing Jonghyun let go of the shirt, his fist unclenching and carefully examining his left cheek.
Key watched as forlorn took over his boyfriend, saddened by it.
“Key,” he whispered, stepping from his hover and kneeled in front of him, paying close attention to the damage, “I’m so sorry. I snapped again-I’m sorry I wasn’t there. I-I’m s-so . . .”
The tears welded up in his eyes as he cringed at the sight of the bruise.
Key shakily held his arms, hiccupping, “Don’t worry. I-It doesn’t hurt that much,” he lied.
Jonghyun’s face twisted in agony and Key knew that he knew he was lying. Jonghyun pulled a hand to his cheek and Key flinched, trying to keep his cheek away from his touch.
“I’m so sorry,” he apologized again, the sadness coming off of his body.
The last thing Key wanted to do was get Jonghyun upset.
He clutched his shirt and buried the right side of his face into his chest, silently sobbing and Jonghyun held on to him.
“I’m gonna keep you away from this,” Jonghyun promised, running a hand through Key’s hair, “I swear this won’t happen again.”
Jonghyun kept himself still as Key trembled against him, trying to comfort Key with words and soothing touches that would usually calm him.
The efforts didn’t alleviate a lot of the stress for Key, but he knew that Jonghyun was trying hard to make up for something that wasn’t his fault.
“Jjong,” he choked, clutching his shirt tighter, “Jjong, take me home.”
“Okay,” he whispered, helping Key to his feet.
They stood and Jonghyun stared at Key with a forlorn expression, pulling him into a gentle hug, “I’m sorry, Key.”
Key wrapped his arms around Jonghyun, leaning into the smaller figure, “Stop apologizing and take me home, okay?”
There was a moan from the ground and the two looked at the source. The bully was holding his nose, rolling around with his eyes squeezed shut.
Key watched as Jonghyun’s eyes lit on fire, a small sound of threat coming from the back of his throat, “You deserved that. I don’t even know why I had a friend like you.”
Jonghyun took Key’s hand and slowly began leading them around the school and to the parking lot, avoiding all teachers and questions as to why they were leaving in the middle of the day.
Key’s legs were stiff and Jonghyun resulted to just carrying him to make things go quickly. Key stared as Jonghyun cradled him while walking to the car, watching how concentrated Jonghyun was to help him.
Tears built up in his eyes again, cursing himself. If only he had just said nothing and walked into the gym nothing would’ve happened. But no, he just had to be a snotty little diva and backfire so simply.
He knew better than to give in to homophobic comments and such, but the term faggot was too harsh to his ears and he just didn’t want to hear it anymore. It seemed childish to act so immaturely, but he couldn’t keep himself from it and it ended up Jonghyun and him like this.
“How did you know?” Key whispered.
Jonghyun looked at him, taking a deep breath as if to try and calm himself down. His big eyes kept them in Key’s gaze, not even bothering to look up to see where he was going, “I snuck into the boy’s locker room after the teacher unlocked it. I was just waiting until Taemin started looking for you in the stalls and couldn’t find you.”
Key nodded, averting his eyes to his fiddling fingers. He really loved it when Jonghyun came into the locker room (and specifically watched him change, but that Key would never admit it) but now he was just thankful Jonghyun decided to skip class.
Slowly, Jonghyun put Key down, unlocking the car with his keys and opened the passenger door, gesturing for him to get in.
Key hesitantly sat on the seat, gripping on the edges with his hands.
Jonghyun leaned in, fastening his seatbelt for him, pecking his good cheek in assurance that he was safe.
“Hey, Key?” Jonghyun asked, staring at a man and a woman walking down the sidewalk holding hands, passing them as they waited for a bus (Jonghyun being too lazy to drive).
Key hummed, not looking up from his English magazine.
“You don’t regret it . . . right?” he still eyed the couple.
Key looked up at Jonghyun, following his gaze to the two ‘normal’ people. Jonghyun swore he could hear Key’s small sigh before his hands was taken, fingers locking together.
“Of course I don’t. I never will.”
That’s all Jonghyun needed to hear.
Key squirmed, almost intentionally shoving someone away from his personal space. He groaned in annoyance and held on to the pole, gridding his teeth.
“Key, calm down,” Jonghyun warned, a few passengers pushing him on to the door.
“I hate subways,” Key huffed.
The two somehow forgot that Saturday’s subways were just as busy as the weekdays and now they were suffering from severe claustrophobia.
“Well, we can’t help it-” Jonghyun was shoved, “-now.”
Someone backed into Key’s front, pissing him off that his personal bubble was officially popped. He managed to, without the guy being able to notice it was his fault, shove the man forward, releasing just a bit of his irritation.
“If you thought correctly, we would’ve taken a damn bus,” Key grumbled.
They were snuggled together on Jonghyun’s couch under a blanket, watching the most uninteresting show in their lives. But it wasn’t like they were even paying close attention to the screen and the person idly walking around Seoul. They just blankly stared, pretending to be interested as they affectionately touched each other.
Jonghyun would pull his fingers down Key’s arm.
Key would run his hand down Jonghyun’s chest.
They would tangle their legs underneath the blanket, every so often chuckling at their behavior.
They were just so cute.
“Jonghyun!” Key scolded as Jonghyun stole another cookie from the tray, “Stop eating so many damn cookies! You’re gonna get fat and I won’t love you anymore!”
Jonghyun pouted, taking a slow bite of his millionth cookie.
I’m not fat.
Key scrunched his nose up in discrimination, his eyes raking over the product.
Jonghyun stood beside him, his eyebrows raised as he wondered what was going through Key’s mind. He was taking forever to stare at this product and he looked like he hated it. So what was the point of even judging it?
“It’s so hideous,” he finally commented, poking the odd-gray shirt, “It’s so bleak.”
“Then why were you staring at it for ten minutes now? We could’ve gone to another store.”
Key scoffed, taking the fabric in his hands for further evaluation, “Everything is worth getting a second chance, so I was trying to give this shirt one. But I can’t find it in my body to even like it, I guess. Oh well,” he shrugged, letting go of the shirt and moving on with his thousands of bags.
Jonghyun complained in a groan, trailing behind him, “You and your logic.”
Key hissed, “Me and my logic gave you the chance to still be in this relationship, mind you.”
Jonghyun stuttered, quickly apologizing.
Jonghyun leaned over the edge of the roof’s wall, staring out to the town before him.
Everything about today was going to be perfect. The sun was high in the sky, it was warm, there was peace and quiet on the rooftop, and Key was coming to see him after a week of separation.
Key had a special class that Jonghyun didn’t take, and that class took him to America as a field trip. Jonghyun was quite displeased to hear they wouldn’t let any other students come along.
So it left him alone for the week. It was painful without Key and he had nothing to sedate it with. Key didn’t even have any communications to Korea, so they hadn’t talked since last Saturday.
Jonghyun’s smile spread wider when he thought of one thing that only eased some of his lonesomeness. Thinking about Key’s smiling face as he enjoyed the sights of American stores and the different people and style.
He chuckled when he imagined Key’s face scrunched up as he took a bite of a greasy pizza slice, munching away happily until he realized there was actually too much grease.
Precious.
Precious Key.
Jonghyun realized he never even took Key to a pizzeria. Maybe when he gets back, he’ll take him to one if he really wanted to and wasn’t sick of American food.
. . . Wait. Wasn’t pizza Italian . . .
He held his face in his hands, blowing air into his cheeks as he waited for his phone to go off. Surely Key would text him when he landed and was coming over.
Maybe Key was jetlagged and needed some sleep. Maybe he won’t come over today.
He’d certainly understand. He’d want to sleep, but the first thing he’d want to do is see Key first; maybe even beg him to cuddle before he slept.
Cuddling.
He missed the cuddling. A lot.
There wasn’t even a way to describe Key’s way of cuddling. The only word to stand out in Jonghyun’s mind was ‘soft’, but that wasn’t even close in comparison to the word he wanted.
He tapped his fingers on the concrete, staring at his phone impatiently. The least Key could do was tell him he wasn’t coming.
Time was slowly passing and Jonghyun sighed.
“Maybe I should rehearse what I’ll say . . .” he nervously told himself, clearing his throat, “Hi-Hey-Uh, Key! Uh . . . Damn it, never mind.”
. . . He couldn’t manage one word without the reddening burn slapping his face, feeling incredibly stupid.
“The song,” Jonghyun said to himself, “I wrote another song. Maybe I should just sing it to him when he gets here. That’s a good introduction. . .”
He straightened his back, giving himself decent posture so he’d sound his best.
He took in a diaphragm of air and slowly let falsetto fall from his lips, high and slow. The words spilled from his lips, imagining Key was right there, sitting on the edge as Jonghyun held him by his hips, making sure he didn’t fall as he swayed from side to side.
His emotions poured into a clear pool, hoping that when he performed live, Key would drink from the pool and really take in what he was trying to communicate.
He wanted to hold him as his voice melted away from falsetto to his clear voice, climbing higher as he spoke of his dying loneliness.
If he had his guitar, everything would’ve flowed easier and words would sound less choppy.
His patted the edge of the roof, tapping to the beat as his singing went on.
It wasn’t a complicated song; it was relatively simplistic. Just childishly romantic words put into each stanza.
Very slowly, he softly ended the song on a low, breathy note, satisfied and ready to sing for Key.
He smiled at the sky, feeling more energetic than ever.
Ready to see Key.
Ready to marvel at Key.
Read to touch Key.
Ready to hold Key.
Jonghyun jumped when skinny arms surrounded his waist, pulling his back to a familiar warm chest. He knowingly smiled, complete ease rushing over him and excitement pulsing through his body.
“That was beautiful, Jjongie,” Key whispered in his ear.
Jonghyun turned in his arms, pulling him closer than ever, relishing in his embrace and fully appreciating that he was really here. A week without him can make you realize how truly lonely you are in the world because nothing else mattered.
Jonghyun laid his head on Key’s shoulder, inhaling his manly scent, yet the hint of lavender was mixed in-Key always managed to smell the best.
He tread his fingers across the skin of Key’s bare arms, becoming reacquainted with the silky smooth skin to his touch.
He missed this way too much.
“Hi,” he breathed, unable to express himself in any words that could pass his lips. He couldn’t help but to inhale him again, probably seeming like a creep-but he didn’t care, now. All that mattered was that Key was here.
“I missed you,” Key skipped the greeting, crushing Jonghyun to him, “I missed you a lot. That’s why I came even though I’m a bit jetlagged.”
Jonghyun could feel his heart speed and smiled bashfully, clutching Key and kissing the free junction between his neck and shoulder, “I missed you a lot more,” he challenged him to the ‘I-something-more’ test… his voice muffled be Key’s skin.
Key let out his soft laugh that was best described as a flawless melody, gracing Jonghyun’s ears.
He missed this, too.
Jonghyun pulled back to look at his face, completely mesmerized as to how he seemed even more beautiful than before. His hands traced over his high cheekbones, a goofy smile on his lips that he couldn’t control. He was really touching Key again, “You liked America?”
Key smiled with large, baby eyes, placing his hands on both sides of Jonghyun’s neck, “I like America . . . But I like you more.”
Jonghyun couldn’t help it anymore after that-he couldn’t hold it in as his fingers curled around the younger’s shirt, pulling him down a little so they could reunite once again.
He felt he could finally breathe after the long and dragged out week. He molded his lips around Key’s, pressing hard against his mouth. It was the best feeling in the world to feel the energy rushing through his body as he kissed Key.
Key breathed on him, his palms pressing harder to Jonghyun’s neck to pull him closer to the nonexistent space between them.
At first, their kiss was soft and sweet, saying their greetings, I miss you, and best of all: I love you. But quickly, it escalated to harsh breathing into each other’s opened mouths, tongues pushing against each other in vigor that neither opposed to.
Jonghyun’s face flushed as Key’s hands slid lower and lower down his chest, going somewhere that Jonghyun couldn’t clarify as he tried focusing on Key’s pretty lips.
“While I was gone,” Key whispered as he pulled back, breathing on Jonghyun’s face as he clutched the hem of his shirt, “I thought about something.”
Jonghyun’s fuzzy head was wrapping around Key’s words, staring at him with an edge of neediness.
He wanted to predict what he was going to say and take everything over, but Key was always full of surprises.
“I was thinking . . . because it’s senior year . . .”
Key’s mouth softly kissed his left temple, slowly trailing down his cheek and close to his ear, his eyelashes fluttering against his skin, making Jonghyun shiver.
Jonghyun held on to his hips, a strain in his veins that stopped him from anything he’d regret.
“It’s been two years . . .” he left another open sentence-full of too many possible meanings that Jonghyun couldn’t even figure out which one he was speaking.
His head was spinning as Key harshly tugged at Jonghyun’s pant line (when did he grip on to them?), getting the message that was basically being screamed at him.
“I really missed you . . . I really . . . want . . . I . . .”
Jonghyun could feel Key’s blush.
“I really . . . want . . . y-you . . .”
Jonghyun stared, completely lost.
But . . .
“Key, you . . . you, uh, just got home, though. You should rest-”
“I don’t want it,” Key sharply cut him off, “I need you, Jonghyun. I never knew a week away could do that.”
Jonghyun didn’t waste anytime after that for his lips to attach to Key’s neck, biting down on him and causing the younger to shiver in anticipation, a small whimper escaping the back of his throat.
“I really . . . I want . . . you, Jonghyun,” his voice was huskier.
Jonghyun hummed in enthusiasm, the blood rushing through his veins so quickly that he couldn’t manage to keep still. He pulled off his neck, slowly enticed with how Key sounded completely confident yet couldn’t even finish his sentence correctly.
Key stared at him in the eyes, hooding as they traveled as low as they could go, Jonghyun blushing just a bit.
“Key,” Jonghyun breathed, “Key, look up at me.”
Key’s eyes flittered to everywhere on the floor for a bit before finally reaching his eyes in uncertainty.
“Key,” Jonghyun reassured, pulling a hand through the younger’s brown locks, “Key, this isn’t something to rush. It’s okay, we don’t need to do this because we’re graduating soon. This is something that should build-I’m not pressuring you into this. I wouldn’t.”
Even though his blood was circulating around his lower region, he wasn’t going to lose Key because of this. If Key was lying about being ready, Jonghyun knew that this would be wrong.
“But . . .” Key’s brows pulled together, “I really want . . . this,” he slid his hands under Jonghyun’s shirt.
Jonghyun gasped and inched forward, laying his forehead on Key shoulder as his talented hands drove him further off the cliff of coherence.
“Are you a-absolutely sure?” he grunted, his fingers curling into Key’s hair.
“You and I,” Key whispered in desperation, “Please. I really want this.”
Jonghyun quickly reattached his lips to the younger’s surprised ones, lifting his legs and hitching them around his waist, walking towards the door so they could get to his apartment.
Welcome home, Key.
It was as if strings had tightly wrapped around their bodies, pulling them together into a closeness that they’d never had before.
And it wasn’t even close to disappointing. It was further than pleasing.
There was a light layer of sweat all over Key’s body; Jonghyun’s dripping from his chin and on to his chest. He looked so beautiful at that moment. No flaw could touch him-only he could touch him. Yes, only he could touch him.
He could touch his soft, skinny, silky body with his fingers; with everything. Just him and no one else.
Key grappled on to Jonghyun’s slick body with his head tilted back, brown hair sticking to his face, and his eyes squeezed shut with his mouth wide open, releasing breathy moans.
Jonghyun shuttered at how perfect it was. He held down Key’s hips as his back continuously arched up, his whole body tensing as another wave rushed through his blood in bliss.
Jonghyun couldn’t help but to smile at his perfection.
It wasn’t a rough first time, but neither was it too light for Key when they got started. It pained Jonghyun to watch his face screw up in severe discomfort from his breached entrance and was ready to pull himself back out, but his boyfriend insisted he stayed put until he said so.
From the moment Key told him to move. . .
. . . Jonghyun didn’t know what was better when he complied.
It thrilled him, sending him into a trance full of high feelings. The pleasure coursed through his sensitive body, grunting as he tried holding back so he wouldn’t hurt Key-he hoped he hadn’t.
But the beginning was long gone.
He could tell Key got tired of his hands slipping from Jonghyun’s shoulders and just clutched his hair, forcing his face to meet the space between his collarbones.
Jonghyun wasted no time to place light kisses in the one spot as he steadily pushed himself in again, careful as Key’s body fidgeted beneath him, a louder moan escaping his throat without a hint of apology.
“J-Jjong,” Key rasped from his dry throat, “J-Jjong, I can’t . . . Almost . . .”
He nodded, understanding Key’s incoherent sentence. He grabbed Key’s tensed fingers, lacing them between his, laying them above his head. Key shamelessly looked at him with his dark and enticing eyes, repeatedly biting his lip to keep himself from early release, but unable to stop his voice moaning from the back of his throat.
Jonghyun sped his pace a bit, taking Key’s chest skin between his teeth and gently rolling it around. Key screamed out Jonghyun’s name in return, his entrance clenching around his arousal.
“Who am I, Key?” he grunted, shuttering.
Key mewled out, gasping as he could feel everything within him climbing up higher in pressure.
“Key, who am I?” he asked again in a gruff voice, making a sharp thrust.
“The only one,” he gasped, shaking his head madly, “The only one, Jonghyun, the only-one!”
Jonghyun pulled back, watching as Keys’ eyes rolled to the back of his head as he gave out a final cry of climax.
“J-Jong-Jonghyun!”
That moment was so incredibly perfect.
“I love you,” Key whispered, his arm limply on top of Jonghyun’s bare torso, taking a shaky hand to sweep his sweaty bangs from his forehead, “I love you so much, Kim Jonghyun.”
Jonghyun hummed with a joyous smile, drawing circles in one spot on the back of Key’s shoulder with his pointer finger, staring at him without blinking. He felt so great; he felt on top of the world.
Key was the one to make him feel this way.
Their first time was better than he thought it would be. He imagined it’d be pure pain for Key and they’d both get irritated and fix themselves, but now, they both wanted it, so they did. Nothing stopped them and they were glad. They realized it would’ve been a real miss-out if they couldn’t finish what they started.
Jonghyun felt like he wouldn’t walk again, but float. His body felt so light with Key and he was set on feeling like this forever.
Key chuckled and kissed Jonghyun’s left shoulder and Jonghyun couldn’t feel anymore loved.
“I love you too much, Key,” he smiled.
Key smiled on to his skin, kissing it again and closing his eyes, humming in reply.
Back Next
(Author's note in last section)
Rating: NC-15
Pairing/characters: JongKey, Jonghyun, Key
Genre: fictional, fluff, unhappiness
Word count: 17,169
Summary: They had only saw each other in their eyes. They had only let each other convince them life was great. They had only got to love each other. At that time . . . Life was truly great.
They’d go somewhere every Sunday and no, it wasn’t some church.
(It’s not like they’d let them in, anyway.)
Jonghyun had dressed semi-formally, wearing a white shirt and black pants, leaving all his bracelets and accessories he barely even wore behind and took his guitar, slinging it over his back before going to Key’s house.
It wasn’t sunny out but neither was it cloudy. It was just a pretty typical day for a Sunday.
He put his hands in his pockets, making his way to Key’s, watching everyone walking around the pathway.
There were kids with both parents, swinging their hands together. Laughing. Happy.
Jonghyun bitterly smiled.
He looked away, nonetheless.
He stared at the ground, watching his steps at he let his mind wander.
It must’ve been wonderful to have parents by your side.
His father kicked him out a year ago for his behavior without any regret-and he hadn’t heard from him since. He was no longer in contact with him and he was pretty glad about it. Life without him was a whole lot better. Hard, but so much better.
He crossed a few streets and looked up, coming upon a small neighborhood that Key had lived in.
They were going to go see his mother today.
Like every Sunday.
Like a good son should.
He looked around the small neighborhood, smiling to the merry as he examined each house’s personally. One never looked the same-not in structure and not even in color. It was like whoever had lived in the house decided to completely stick out their individuality.
This neighborhood was the description of his boyfriend.
He hoisted his guitar back up as his feet pressed onward on the street, taking a gradual turn, meeting his house in the culdesac.
He remembered how Key always complained he wanted to paint the house pink; but his mother refused. Key would grumble on about how he had to negotiate on a color that wasn’t even as pretty as pink-pastel mint green.
Jonghyun chuckled to himself when he recalled the tone of pique stained in Key’s voice as he’d once ran a hand over the paint job.
Since he wasn’t happy with the color, Key made another negotiation. If they painted the house pastel mint green, Key could paint whatever he wanted on the walls.
Jonghyun didn’t know how his mother even coped with accepting it.
He walked up the yard, not giving a thought about going to the front door. Instead, he visited the side of the house, his eyes wandering all over the wall.
On both sides of the house, Key painted a pair of blue wings with the accent of purples over it. The wings were person-less in the middle, starting in blank space.
His eyes went further down as the wings stretched to the far end, the design so realistic when discarding the color.
They colors of purples and blues softly mixed together, accenting the close detailing that didn’t just make simple wing a first grade could, but details that the work of a skilled artist had.
It didn’t match the wall whatsoever from the color all the way to the actual drawing of the wings.
But it matched the artist Key, so he absolutely knew these wings were the best in the world (or him just being super dedicated to his boyfriend).
His hand slowly ran down the free space between the wings.
Key could fit in the middle . . .
“Why are you over there again?”
Startled, Jonghyun jumped back, his gaze meeting Key-his fashion sense mirroring his own.
He smiled warmly like he hadn’t in years and came closer, immediately grasping on to his hand and leading them back out the cheery place.
“You didn’t answer my question,” Key reminded, flicking a part of his bangs to the side as he stared at the space before them.
Jonghyun’s stomach bubbled as if he were caught red-handed doing something wrong. He chuckled, fighting off his stupid senses, “Those wings . . . again.”
“Again?” Key chuckled, “How many times do you plan on looking at them? They’re the same every day.”
Jonghyun quickly objected, shaking his head, denying, “Nope. Every day there’s something different about those wings. Today . . . Today I noticed how the spot in between each wing . . . That space could fit you . . . I wonder, should we ever take a picture?”
Key’s face slightly blushed as he turned his head away, faking a scoff, “Me with purple wings, yeah right.”
“I want a picture of it.”
Key looked back at Jonghyun, a sheepish smile playing on his lips, “Fine.”
Jonghyun’s heart fluttered madly and childishly swung their hands in excitement.
“Ah! We’re going to see my mom today!” he sang.
Key chuckled and participated in swinging their hands, giving Jonghyun a jerk whenever they were actually supposed to take a turn and the older one forgot to.
They talked among the way casually, unimportant conversation to just pass the time.
Well, it always intrigued Jonghyun; it was Key for crying out loud.
The sidewalk soon turned into a parking lot, and Jonghyun took a once over of the building, smiling as he pulled Key inside.
He paid no mind to anyone around them and entered an empty elevator, pressing the floor and leaning his arm on the wall.
He watched Key smile beside him. Key very well knew how much Jonghyun couldn’t get enough of his favorite parent ever. Even though they did the same thing every Sunday, it was like the first time.
The elevator opened and they escaped the bad elevator music, casually making to his mother’s room without weird glances.
Jonghyun was prepared to greet his mother with the biggest smile on his face until he cut short-she wasn’t even in her room.
He then rolled his eyes with a scoff, turning back around and asking one of the nurses for her location.
“On the roof,” she simply answered.
He nodded, clutching Key’s hand tighter and going back to the doorway to the stairs and taking flight from there.
Key groaned but didn’t necessarily complain. It made Jonghyun laugh.
There weren’t too many steps to call the trip bothersome, but he knew on the inside that Key was dying. He was just keeping it to himself because they were visiting his mother.
They reached the roof, seeing that it wasn’t only his mother up there, but many more patients that decided they wanted some fresh air and see the city.
He looked around, trying to identify which one should be his mom. It was hard because all women her age had the same hairstyle.
Key tapped on his shoulder, catching his attention and putting over to a bench that a lonesome woman sat on. Once Jonghyun laid eyes on her, he knew exactly who it was.
He dragged Key along, energetic and skipping to his mother until he ended up at her side, “Mom!”
The woman looked up from her gaze at the city, a smile falling upon her lips that always made her look younger than she really was.
“Jonghyun! Kibum-ah!” she exclaimed, patting the seats next to her, “Right on time, like always. Sit!”
Jonghyun nodded as Key bowed-she teasingly scolded him for being so formal when he shouldn’t.
“So, how are you two doing?” she asked, holding Jonghyun’s hand in hers, “Ah, you two look so dashing as always.”
“Great!” Jonghyun exclaimed, biting his lips, “Perfect!”
He heard Key chuckled and blushed, realizing he sounded more like a toddler learning words than a grown young adult. It wasn’t like he planned on using complicated words.
She grinned from ear to ear, nodding, “How’ve you been, Kibum-ah?”
“The same,” he shrugged, “How’ve you been, mom?”
In-laws, Jonghyun thought.
“I wouldn’t lie, so I’d say I could do better. But, you two are here now, that’s all that matters right now.”
Jonghyun’s face slightly fell and his mother saw, giving his hand a weak squeeze.
Jonghyun regained posture quickly, sloppily bringing out his guitar and making a soft strum to make sure he wasn’t disturbing anyone, “I wrote another song, mom.”
“It’s another one about Kibum, isn’t it?” she chuckled, patting him on the cheek before reaching over for Key’s hand, forcing him to get up and bring him to the other side of her, “It seems he’s solely your inspiration. Doesn’t it seem so, Kibum?”
Key blushed heavily and nodded in agreement. She patted his hand and held it close to her, looking at Jonghyun expectantly, “Well let’s hear it.”
Jonghyun nodded, breathing out before he started another strum.
It was the last lap they had to run for the day and Key couldn’t be anymore than glad.
He hated gym period-it was filled with nasty human beings and sweaty bodies that smelled awful. Of course when he sweats, he only smelled of sweet scents, so he couldn’t put the blame on himself.
His legs were aching and his lungs were on fire and ready to combust.
He made a last turn, seemingly lasting forever with the speed he went. He never thought he was out of shape, but apparently his stamina was trying to prove something to him.
The sun beat down on his skin and he felt uncomfortable-he was going to get sunburned and then he’d have a reason to yell at the teacher for not letting him put his products on his face for extra protection.
He took his last few steps before falling to his knees, huffing to catch his breath. If the gym teacher made him do this again, he swore he was going to kill him.
The sun rays stung his back and he was about to try crawling away to get out of its way. If he stood outside any longer, he swore he was going to burn to ash with a screeching cry.
“Go back inside, guys,” the gym teacher shrugged, gesturing for everyone to follow him.
He had his back turned and a few followed the teacher. His friend, Taemin, stayed by Key’s side until the elder told him to go first, afraid Taemin might get heat stroke easily if he lagged behind with him.
Others had stayed behind, catching their breaths as they tried taunting Key.
“Can the fag stand?” an unfamiliar voice teased as it took a large inhale, “Or does the fag need Jonghyun to pick him up?”
Key kept quiet, slowly standing on his feet and ignoring the boys as he left on wobbly legs. He wasn’t insulted but he was surely agitated. These people had the same comments every day to the point that they were just words repeating on a broken record. Too many times they’ve said the same thing and now it was just annoying to listen to.
He walked away with dignity, unlike the others who were stepping on his heels
“Aw,” a different voice mocked, “Can little Kibum not take a joke?”
Key scoffed, crossing his arms and arrogantly walked away.
He didn’t understand why people still had to make a big fuss over him and Jonghyun since they started two years ago. Did it never get old? What did these people do with their lives?
“C’mon,” that same voice went on, “Talk to us, Kibum. Girls like to do that.”
“Fuck off,” he threatened.
The boys behind him all gave him the cliché ‘ooh!’ like they were back in middle school when someone was in trouble as they got closer to the building.
“Faggot’s feistier than I thought,” the guy chuckled tugging his arm, “C’mon.”
Key spun and roughly pushed the tall guy-he was one of Jonghyun’s old friends-on the chest, “Don’t call me that! Go find someone else to pester.”
He realized there were more boys behind him than he thought.
Where was that damn teacher now?
“But that’s your name, isn’t it?” he smirked in defiance, “I can’t do anything about that when it clearly describes who you are. What do people like you say? Oh, right. You should embrace it.”
Key shoved him again, his eyes sharply pulling to all the others-there had to be about six more, “If it were up to me, you’re so much worse than that. Leave me the hell alone.”
He inched closer again and Key was so done with this that he straight up slapped him across the face, “Don’t you dare gain the audacity to try anything, I swear.”
He turned on his heels, walking close to entrance before he was roughly grabbed by the wrist and slammed his back on the wall. The assaulter’s fingers wrapped around the top of Key’s shirt, balling into a fist.
He nearly shook, understanding that the guy was easily ticked off and now he was going to get it.
“Get the fuck off!” he growled, trying to pry the bully’s fingers from his shirt.
“No, you listen, you gay delinquent-”
Even though it wasn’t the right time to, Kibum couldn’t help but to snort in his mind.
Using such a big word for a tiny brain.
“-Don’t you ever touch me. You’re asking for serious problems, now,” he shook him, Key’s back roughly hitting the wall each shake.
“Knock some sense into him,” one of them suggested, raising his brows.
The bully smirked, biting the side of his lower lip with nod, “Maybe I should.”
“Don’t. Touch. Me.” Key tried retaliating, but to no avail.
Key never thought it would come to this point. Through the years, it was only cruel words. Here and there, there were shoves and hitting on his back, but never the face.
The attacker raised his fist and Key began quivering.
When did he deserve this abuse? What did he do wrong?
Where the hell was this teacher?!
His grasped on to the fist clutching his shirt and desperately trying to move him away, wanting to avoid the hit.
The attacker’s friends cheered it on behind him, smiling like little demons watching the devil take a prey.
The guy’s fist rose higher, soon enough swinging close to his face.
Key’s natural instinct was to shut his eyes and tense for the blow. He had no escape from this.
The fist came hard on his left cheek, the blow forcing his whole body to jerk right, but the grasp on his shirt held him.
Key cried out, pulling a hand to his cheek, tensing when he touched it, feeling how tender it had became easily.
He was hit over and over on the same cheek, crying out louder each time in pain.
It was like the hits weren’t going to end. He could just feel the bruise growing bigger and uglier each time the fist came back. He couldn’t totally focus on the pain, but also focusing on how bad his face looked.
Tears fell from his eyes and his face grew hot with embarrassment that he couldn’t even stand up for himself.
“You shouldn’t exist,” the guy hissed, “You were born to be a mistake. You took away one of my friends and got him confused. You’re a filthy, gross, dirty-”
He was cut off and Key was jerked to the left a little, falling to his knees as his shirt was released. He held on to his left cheek, sniffing hard before trying to open his eyes-closing his left because it hurt too much.
He stared out of his right eye, seeing the familiar dinosaur structure standing over the bully on the ground, clutching his shirt and shaking him vigorously, his head hitting the ground hard each time.
“What do you think you’re doing?” Jonghyun spat at his ex-friend, a quivering fist colliding with the boy in his hold.
The attacker moved his mouth around, scrunching his nose to check if anything was severely injured, “What does it look like I’m doing, Jonghyun?”
Jonghyun hit him again and Key cringed at his violence.
“It looks like you were hitting my boyfriend, that’s what it look like!” he growled, punching him square in the jaw without a thought.
Key trembled as he watched Jonghyun’s nostrils flare and eyes burning right into the assaulter’s.
The watchers slowly stepped back from the fight, quietly making their way into the gym.
The boy wheezed as Jonghyun refused stopping, letting out all his anger on the guy.
“You really thought you were gonna get away with it?” he screamed at him, “Even if he never told me about it, you really think this would be kept a secret? Damn, you are so wrong!”
Key coward speechlessly as Jonghyun beat on his old friend, each hit making him go further into unconsciousness.
Jonghyun didn’t seem to notice his victim’s lack of reaction, keeping his fist of fury going.
When Key could see the blood running from he guy’s nose and mouth in abundance, he couldn’t stay frozen any longer.
He crawled over, immediately putting a hand on Jonghyun’s flexed arm to stop him.
Jonghyun’s head sharply turned and a fist started coming his way. Key flinched, shrinking as he closed his eyes.
“K-Key,” Jonghyun breathed, the hit never coming, “Shit, Key.”
He hesitantly opened his eye, seeing Jonghyun let go of the shirt, his fist unclenching and carefully examining his left cheek.
Key watched as forlorn took over his boyfriend, saddened by it.
“Key,” he whispered, stepping from his hover and kneeled in front of him, paying close attention to the damage, “I’m so sorry. I snapped again-I’m sorry I wasn’t there. I-I’m s-so . . .”
The tears welded up in his eyes as he cringed at the sight of the bruise.
Key shakily held his arms, hiccupping, “Don’t worry. I-It doesn’t hurt that much,” he lied.
Jonghyun’s face twisted in agony and Key knew that he knew he was lying. Jonghyun pulled a hand to his cheek and Key flinched, trying to keep his cheek away from his touch.
“I’m so sorry,” he apologized again, the sadness coming off of his body.
The last thing Key wanted to do was get Jonghyun upset.
He clutched his shirt and buried the right side of his face into his chest, silently sobbing and Jonghyun held on to him.
“I’m gonna keep you away from this,” Jonghyun promised, running a hand through Key’s hair, “I swear this won’t happen again.”
Jonghyun kept himself still as Key trembled against him, trying to comfort Key with words and soothing touches that would usually calm him.
The efforts didn’t alleviate a lot of the stress for Key, but he knew that Jonghyun was trying hard to make up for something that wasn’t his fault.
“Jjong,” he choked, clutching his shirt tighter, “Jjong, take me home.”
“Okay,” he whispered, helping Key to his feet.
They stood and Jonghyun stared at Key with a forlorn expression, pulling him into a gentle hug, “I’m sorry, Key.”
Key wrapped his arms around Jonghyun, leaning into the smaller figure, “Stop apologizing and take me home, okay?”
There was a moan from the ground and the two looked at the source. The bully was holding his nose, rolling around with his eyes squeezed shut.
Key watched as Jonghyun’s eyes lit on fire, a small sound of threat coming from the back of his throat, “You deserved that. I don’t even know why I had a friend like you.”
Jonghyun took Key’s hand and slowly began leading them around the school and to the parking lot, avoiding all teachers and questions as to why they were leaving in the middle of the day.
Key’s legs were stiff and Jonghyun resulted to just carrying him to make things go quickly. Key stared as Jonghyun cradled him while walking to the car, watching how concentrated Jonghyun was to help him.
Tears built up in his eyes again, cursing himself. If only he had just said nothing and walked into the gym nothing would’ve happened. But no, he just had to be a snotty little diva and backfire so simply.
He knew better than to give in to homophobic comments and such, but the term faggot was too harsh to his ears and he just didn’t want to hear it anymore. It seemed childish to act so immaturely, but he couldn’t keep himself from it and it ended up Jonghyun and him like this.
“How did you know?” Key whispered.
Jonghyun looked at him, taking a deep breath as if to try and calm himself down. His big eyes kept them in Key’s gaze, not even bothering to look up to see where he was going, “I snuck into the boy’s locker room after the teacher unlocked it. I was just waiting until Taemin started looking for you in the stalls and couldn’t find you.”
Key nodded, averting his eyes to his fiddling fingers. He really loved it when Jonghyun came into the locker room (and specifically watched him change, but that Key would never admit it) but now he was just thankful Jonghyun decided to skip class.
Slowly, Jonghyun put Key down, unlocking the car with his keys and opened the passenger door, gesturing for him to get in.
Key hesitantly sat on the seat, gripping on the edges with his hands.
Jonghyun leaned in, fastening his seatbelt for him, pecking his good cheek in assurance that he was safe.
“Hey, Key?” Jonghyun asked, staring at a man and a woman walking down the sidewalk holding hands, passing them as they waited for a bus (Jonghyun being too lazy to drive).
Key hummed, not looking up from his English magazine.
“You don’t regret it . . . right?” he still eyed the couple.
Key looked up at Jonghyun, following his gaze to the two ‘normal’ people. Jonghyun swore he could hear Key’s small sigh before his hands was taken, fingers locking together.
“Of course I don’t. I never will.”
That’s all Jonghyun needed to hear.
Key squirmed, almost intentionally shoving someone away from his personal space. He groaned in annoyance and held on to the pole, gridding his teeth.
“Key, calm down,” Jonghyun warned, a few passengers pushing him on to the door.
“I hate subways,” Key huffed.
The two somehow forgot that Saturday’s subways were just as busy as the weekdays and now they were suffering from severe claustrophobia.
“Well, we can’t help it-” Jonghyun was shoved, “-now.”
Someone backed into Key’s front, pissing him off that his personal bubble was officially popped. He managed to, without the guy being able to notice it was his fault, shove the man forward, releasing just a bit of his irritation.
“If you thought correctly, we would’ve taken a damn bus,” Key grumbled.
They were snuggled together on Jonghyun’s couch under a blanket, watching the most uninteresting show in their lives. But it wasn’t like they were even paying close attention to the screen and the person idly walking around Seoul. They just blankly stared, pretending to be interested as they affectionately touched each other.
Jonghyun would pull his fingers down Key’s arm.
Key would run his hand down Jonghyun’s chest.
They would tangle their legs underneath the blanket, every so often chuckling at their behavior.
They were just so cute.
“Jonghyun!” Key scolded as Jonghyun stole another cookie from the tray, “Stop eating so many damn cookies! You’re gonna get fat and I won’t love you anymore!”
Jonghyun pouted, taking a slow bite of his millionth cookie.
I’m not fat.
Key scrunched his nose up in discrimination, his eyes raking over the product.
Jonghyun stood beside him, his eyebrows raised as he wondered what was going through Key’s mind. He was taking forever to stare at this product and he looked like he hated it. So what was the point of even judging it?
“It’s so hideous,” he finally commented, poking the odd-gray shirt, “It’s so bleak.”
“Then why were you staring at it for ten minutes now? We could’ve gone to another store.”
Key scoffed, taking the fabric in his hands for further evaluation, “Everything is worth getting a second chance, so I was trying to give this shirt one. But I can’t find it in my body to even like it, I guess. Oh well,” he shrugged, letting go of the shirt and moving on with his thousands of bags.
Jonghyun complained in a groan, trailing behind him, “You and your logic.”
Key hissed, “Me and my logic gave you the chance to still be in this relationship, mind you.”
Jonghyun stuttered, quickly apologizing.
Jonghyun leaned over the edge of the roof’s wall, staring out to the town before him.
Everything about today was going to be perfect. The sun was high in the sky, it was warm, there was peace and quiet on the rooftop, and Key was coming to see him after a week of separation.
Key had a special class that Jonghyun didn’t take, and that class took him to America as a field trip. Jonghyun was quite displeased to hear they wouldn’t let any other students come along.
So it left him alone for the week. It was painful without Key and he had nothing to sedate it with. Key didn’t even have any communications to Korea, so they hadn’t talked since last Saturday.
Jonghyun’s smile spread wider when he thought of one thing that only eased some of his lonesomeness. Thinking about Key’s smiling face as he enjoyed the sights of American stores and the different people and style.
He chuckled when he imagined Key’s face scrunched up as he took a bite of a greasy pizza slice, munching away happily until he realized there was actually too much grease.
Precious.
Precious Key.
Jonghyun realized he never even took Key to a pizzeria. Maybe when he gets back, he’ll take him to one if he really wanted to and wasn’t sick of American food.
. . . Wait. Wasn’t pizza Italian . . .
He held his face in his hands, blowing air into his cheeks as he waited for his phone to go off. Surely Key would text him when he landed and was coming over.
Maybe Key was jetlagged and needed some sleep. Maybe he won’t come over today.
He’d certainly understand. He’d want to sleep, but the first thing he’d want to do is see Key first; maybe even beg him to cuddle before he slept.
Cuddling.
He missed the cuddling. A lot.
There wasn’t even a way to describe Key’s way of cuddling. The only word to stand out in Jonghyun’s mind was ‘soft’, but that wasn’t even close in comparison to the word he wanted.
He tapped his fingers on the concrete, staring at his phone impatiently. The least Key could do was tell him he wasn’t coming.
Time was slowly passing and Jonghyun sighed.
“Maybe I should rehearse what I’ll say . . .” he nervously told himself, clearing his throat, “Hi-Hey-Uh, Key! Uh . . . Damn it, never mind.”
. . . He couldn’t manage one word without the reddening burn slapping his face, feeling incredibly stupid.
“The song,” Jonghyun said to himself, “I wrote another song. Maybe I should just sing it to him when he gets here. That’s a good introduction. . .”
He straightened his back, giving himself decent posture so he’d sound his best.
He took in a diaphragm of air and slowly let falsetto fall from his lips, high and slow. The words spilled from his lips, imagining Key was right there, sitting on the edge as Jonghyun held him by his hips, making sure he didn’t fall as he swayed from side to side.
His emotions poured into a clear pool, hoping that when he performed live, Key would drink from the pool and really take in what he was trying to communicate.
He wanted to hold him as his voice melted away from falsetto to his clear voice, climbing higher as he spoke of his dying loneliness.
If he had his guitar, everything would’ve flowed easier and words would sound less choppy.
His patted the edge of the roof, tapping to the beat as his singing went on.
It wasn’t a complicated song; it was relatively simplistic. Just childishly romantic words put into each stanza.
Very slowly, he softly ended the song on a low, breathy note, satisfied and ready to sing for Key.
He smiled at the sky, feeling more energetic than ever.
Ready to see Key.
Ready to marvel at Key.
Read to touch Key.
Ready to hold Key.
Jonghyun jumped when skinny arms surrounded his waist, pulling his back to a familiar warm chest. He knowingly smiled, complete ease rushing over him and excitement pulsing through his body.
“That was beautiful, Jjongie,” Key whispered in his ear.
Jonghyun turned in his arms, pulling him closer than ever, relishing in his embrace and fully appreciating that he was really here. A week without him can make you realize how truly lonely you are in the world because nothing else mattered.
Jonghyun laid his head on Key’s shoulder, inhaling his manly scent, yet the hint of lavender was mixed in-Key always managed to smell the best.
He tread his fingers across the skin of Key’s bare arms, becoming reacquainted with the silky smooth skin to his touch.
He missed this way too much.
“Hi,” he breathed, unable to express himself in any words that could pass his lips. He couldn’t help but to inhale him again, probably seeming like a creep-but he didn’t care, now. All that mattered was that Key was here.
“I missed you,” Key skipped the greeting, crushing Jonghyun to him, “I missed you a lot. That’s why I came even though I’m a bit jetlagged.”
Jonghyun could feel his heart speed and smiled bashfully, clutching Key and kissing the free junction between his neck and shoulder, “I missed you a lot more,” he challenged him to the ‘I-something-more’ test… his voice muffled be Key’s skin.
Key let out his soft laugh that was best described as a flawless melody, gracing Jonghyun’s ears.
He missed this, too.
Jonghyun pulled back to look at his face, completely mesmerized as to how he seemed even more beautiful than before. His hands traced over his high cheekbones, a goofy smile on his lips that he couldn’t control. He was really touching Key again, “You liked America?”
Key smiled with large, baby eyes, placing his hands on both sides of Jonghyun’s neck, “I like America . . . But I like you more.”
Jonghyun couldn’t help it anymore after that-he couldn’t hold it in as his fingers curled around the younger’s shirt, pulling him down a little so they could reunite once again.
He felt he could finally breathe after the long and dragged out week. He molded his lips around Key’s, pressing hard against his mouth. It was the best feeling in the world to feel the energy rushing through his body as he kissed Key.
Key breathed on him, his palms pressing harder to Jonghyun’s neck to pull him closer to the nonexistent space between them.
At first, their kiss was soft and sweet, saying their greetings, I miss you, and best of all: I love you. But quickly, it escalated to harsh breathing into each other’s opened mouths, tongues pushing against each other in vigor that neither opposed to.
Jonghyun’s face flushed as Key’s hands slid lower and lower down his chest, going somewhere that Jonghyun couldn’t clarify as he tried focusing on Key’s pretty lips.
“While I was gone,” Key whispered as he pulled back, breathing on Jonghyun’s face as he clutched the hem of his shirt, “I thought about something.”
Jonghyun’s fuzzy head was wrapping around Key’s words, staring at him with an edge of neediness.
He wanted to predict what he was going to say and take everything over, but Key was always full of surprises.
“I was thinking . . . because it’s senior year . . .”
Key’s mouth softly kissed his left temple, slowly trailing down his cheek and close to his ear, his eyelashes fluttering against his skin, making Jonghyun shiver.
Jonghyun held on to his hips, a strain in his veins that stopped him from anything he’d regret.
“It’s been two years . . .” he left another open sentence-full of too many possible meanings that Jonghyun couldn’t even figure out which one he was speaking.
His head was spinning as Key harshly tugged at Jonghyun’s pant line (when did he grip on to them?), getting the message that was basically being screamed at him.
“I really missed you . . . I really . . . want . . . I . . .”
Jonghyun could feel Key’s blush.
“I really . . . want . . . y-you . . .”
Jonghyun stared, completely lost.
But . . .
“Key, you . . . you, uh, just got home, though. You should rest-”
“I don’t want it,” Key sharply cut him off, “I need you, Jonghyun. I never knew a week away could do that.”
Jonghyun didn’t waste anytime after that for his lips to attach to Key’s neck, biting down on him and causing the younger to shiver in anticipation, a small whimper escaping the back of his throat.
“I really . . . I want . . . you, Jonghyun,” his voice was huskier.
Jonghyun hummed in enthusiasm, the blood rushing through his veins so quickly that he couldn’t manage to keep still. He pulled off his neck, slowly enticed with how Key sounded completely confident yet couldn’t even finish his sentence correctly.
Key stared at him in the eyes, hooding as they traveled as low as they could go, Jonghyun blushing just a bit.
“Key,” Jonghyun breathed, “Key, look up at me.”
Key’s eyes flittered to everywhere on the floor for a bit before finally reaching his eyes in uncertainty.
“Key,” Jonghyun reassured, pulling a hand through the younger’s brown locks, “Key, this isn’t something to rush. It’s okay, we don’t need to do this because we’re graduating soon. This is something that should build-I’m not pressuring you into this. I wouldn’t.”
Even though his blood was circulating around his lower region, he wasn’t going to lose Key because of this. If Key was lying about being ready, Jonghyun knew that this would be wrong.
“But . . .” Key’s brows pulled together, “I really want . . . this,” he slid his hands under Jonghyun’s shirt.
Jonghyun gasped and inched forward, laying his forehead on Key shoulder as his talented hands drove him further off the cliff of coherence.
“Are you a-absolutely sure?” he grunted, his fingers curling into Key’s hair.
“You and I,” Key whispered in desperation, “Please. I really want this.”
Jonghyun quickly reattached his lips to the younger’s surprised ones, lifting his legs and hitching them around his waist, walking towards the door so they could get to his apartment.
Welcome home, Key.
It was as if strings had tightly wrapped around their bodies, pulling them together into a closeness that they’d never had before.
And it wasn’t even close to disappointing. It was further than pleasing.
There was a light layer of sweat all over Key’s body; Jonghyun’s dripping from his chin and on to his chest. He looked so beautiful at that moment. No flaw could touch him-only he could touch him. Yes, only he could touch him.
He could touch his soft, skinny, silky body with his fingers; with everything. Just him and no one else.
Key grappled on to Jonghyun’s slick body with his head tilted back, brown hair sticking to his face, and his eyes squeezed shut with his mouth wide open, releasing breathy moans.
Jonghyun shuttered at how perfect it was. He held down Key’s hips as his back continuously arched up, his whole body tensing as another wave rushed through his blood in bliss.
Jonghyun couldn’t help but to smile at his perfection.
It wasn’t a rough first time, but neither was it too light for Key when they got started. It pained Jonghyun to watch his face screw up in severe discomfort from his breached entrance and was ready to pull himself back out, but his boyfriend insisted he stayed put until he said so.
From the moment Key told him to move. . .
. . . Jonghyun didn’t know what was better when he complied.
It thrilled him, sending him into a trance full of high feelings. The pleasure coursed through his sensitive body, grunting as he tried holding back so he wouldn’t hurt Key-he hoped he hadn’t.
But the beginning was long gone.
He could tell Key got tired of his hands slipping from Jonghyun’s shoulders and just clutched his hair, forcing his face to meet the space between his collarbones.
Jonghyun wasted no time to place light kisses in the one spot as he steadily pushed himself in again, careful as Key’s body fidgeted beneath him, a louder moan escaping his throat without a hint of apology.
“J-Jjong,” Key rasped from his dry throat, “J-Jjong, I can’t . . . Almost . . .”
He nodded, understanding Key’s incoherent sentence. He grabbed Key’s tensed fingers, lacing them between his, laying them above his head. Key shamelessly looked at him with his dark and enticing eyes, repeatedly biting his lip to keep himself from early release, but unable to stop his voice moaning from the back of his throat.
Jonghyun sped his pace a bit, taking Key’s chest skin between his teeth and gently rolling it around. Key screamed out Jonghyun’s name in return, his entrance clenching around his arousal.
“Who am I, Key?” he grunted, shuttering.
Key mewled out, gasping as he could feel everything within him climbing up higher in pressure.
“Key, who am I?” he asked again in a gruff voice, making a sharp thrust.
“The only one,” he gasped, shaking his head madly, “The only one, Jonghyun, the only-one!”
Jonghyun pulled back, watching as Keys’ eyes rolled to the back of his head as he gave out a final cry of climax.
“J-Jong-Jonghyun!”
That moment was so incredibly perfect.
“I love you,” Key whispered, his arm limply on top of Jonghyun’s bare torso, taking a shaky hand to sweep his sweaty bangs from his forehead, “I love you so much, Kim Jonghyun.”
Jonghyun hummed with a joyous smile, drawing circles in one spot on the back of Key’s shoulder with his pointer finger, staring at him without blinking. He felt so great; he felt on top of the world.
Key was the one to make him feel this way.
Their first time was better than he thought it would be. He imagined it’d be pure pain for Key and they’d both get irritated and fix themselves, but now, they both wanted it, so they did. Nothing stopped them and they were glad. They realized it would’ve been a real miss-out if they couldn’t finish what they started.
Jonghyun felt like he wouldn’t walk again, but float. His body felt so light with Key and he was set on feeling like this forever.
Key chuckled and kissed Jonghyun’s left shoulder and Jonghyun couldn’t feel anymore loved.
“I love you too much, Key,” he smiled.
Key smiled on to his skin, kissing it again and closing his eyes, humming in reply.
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(Author's note in last section)