It's all still good
Things are still going great. It still amazes me a bit and I can't help but wonder if the other shoe will drop soon. Moving in with me is still a go (again being pessimistic, for now). We talk about it at least once a day and he always participates in the conversation about it, if not sometimes initiates it. It went from "if I live with you" to "when I live with you".
So May 1st it is, but there is a small hiccup I suppose.
Yesterday he told me his older sister is coming into town in May, on May 14th to be exact, a day after his birthday and 2 days before our 1 year anniversary actually. Not a big deal, I've never met her, although I did have a chance in the very early stages of us dating but I felt it would have been a bit awkward (we were only going out for like 3 weeks). Even though she is close in age to me (she's 28 I will be 25 when she's down) she still acts like a 2nd mother to him and from what he told me she thinks she's right about everything and very outspoken. Like I said earlier both my bf and I know his mother is not going to be happy or like this at all.
Apparently neither will his sister, he said she would back up his mother and cause even more drama then he wants (especially about paying off bills etc). So he told me yesterday that he will start paying the rent and stuff as if he lives with me on May 1st but only move in once she's gone to make things easier for him, which is probably just under a week from May 14th. Of course, even more delays I suppose but it doesn't seem to be stopping anything. Sad that he almost has to hide this from his family until the last minute.
So that leaves even more time for something to go wrong, although I guess better now then once he's moved in. He said he's dropping small hints to his mom about leaving. She always gets irritated with him about some things and she "jokingly" says "well then maybe you should just move out!" and he told me he said to her the other day when she mentioned it "sure, I will then".
He hopes to give her the idea that if she keeps suggesting it then he will just go ahead and do it.
I mean, we are all adults here and his possessive, lonely mother will have to let him go one day or another, if not now with me then when he's with another girl or even by himself, either way it's going to happen.
Aside from that everything else is going well, he mentioned how when we had our huge fight a while back about him feeling pressured and that I was too dependent/clingy on him etc... he thinks I've changed remarkably and that he loves the way I am now. So do I, because I feel like a better person too. And Im getting better and better at living more for myself. And he's getting better at appreciating me and being understanding of how I function (that I do still overly worry about small stuff).
Until he's actually settled in I will always have a small doubt in the back of my mind that this may all just disappear or that his feeling of being happy with me will go away again. When I talked with him the other day about his friend A and that once he (my bf) lives with me that it's obvious A will end up coming over, that A better put his hate of me behind him especially when he's in my house.
My bf said A doesn't hate me at all. Hah okay then I said "why a while back was he telling you to leave me?" my bf said "because he knew I wasn't happy at the time". And I said "well just because you get unhappy sometimes doesn't mean you should break up with me every single time". My bf agreed but doesn't like talking about this (especially over a nice dinner out) so we dropped the subject shortly after.
Yes I agree if your really unhappy then why bother sticking around, but I hope he doesn't think anytime something is not the way he likes it that it means we should end our relationship. That to me, speaks immaturity. Maybe he's learning not to be like that (which it seems that way), or maybe he's just going through another happy phase right now and the minute something shitty happens he'll drift away or become unavailable.
That has to be my biggest fear at the moment.
So that is why I try and stay busy or focus on myself. That seems to be way more attractive then waiting around for him all the time (duh). He also hasn't said "I love you" but has a few times said things like "that's why I do this for the girl I love" or "because I love you". I dunno, it's all day by day.
What would really kill me is if he moves in for a while then decides he's tired of it. Ugh, I have to stop worrying about the future.
So May 1st it is, but there is a small hiccup I suppose.
Yesterday he told me his older sister is coming into town in May, on May 14th to be exact, a day after his birthday and 2 days before our 1 year anniversary actually. Not a big deal, I've never met her, although I did have a chance in the very early stages of us dating but I felt it would have been a bit awkward (we were only going out for like 3 weeks). Even though she is close in age to me (she's 28 I will be 25 when she's down) she still acts like a 2nd mother to him and from what he told me she thinks she's right about everything and very outspoken. Like I said earlier both my bf and I know his mother is not going to be happy or like this at all.
Apparently neither will his sister, he said she would back up his mother and cause even more drama then he wants (especially about paying off bills etc). So he told me yesterday that he will start paying the rent and stuff as if he lives with me on May 1st but only move in once she's gone to make things easier for him, which is probably just under a week from May 14th. Of course, even more delays I suppose but it doesn't seem to be stopping anything. Sad that he almost has to hide this from his family until the last minute.
So that leaves even more time for something to go wrong, although I guess better now then once he's moved in. He said he's dropping small hints to his mom about leaving. She always gets irritated with him about some things and she "jokingly" says "well then maybe you should just move out!" and he told me he said to her the other day when she mentioned it "sure, I will then".
He hopes to give her the idea that if she keeps suggesting it then he will just go ahead and do it.
I mean, we are all adults here and his possessive, lonely mother will have to let him go one day or another, if not now with me then when he's with another girl or even by himself, either way it's going to happen.
Aside from that everything else is going well, he mentioned how when we had our huge fight a while back about him feeling pressured and that I was too dependent/clingy on him etc... he thinks I've changed remarkably and that he loves the way I am now. So do I, because I feel like a better person too. And Im getting better and better at living more for myself. And he's getting better at appreciating me and being understanding of how I function (that I do still overly worry about small stuff).
Until he's actually settled in I will always have a small doubt in the back of my mind that this may all just disappear or that his feeling of being happy with me will go away again. When I talked with him the other day about his friend A and that once he (my bf) lives with me that it's obvious A will end up coming over, that A better put his hate of me behind him especially when he's in my house.
My bf said A doesn't hate me at all. Hah okay then I said "why a while back was he telling you to leave me?" my bf said "because he knew I wasn't happy at the time". And I said "well just because you get unhappy sometimes doesn't mean you should break up with me every single time". My bf agreed but doesn't like talking about this (especially over a nice dinner out) so we dropped the subject shortly after.
Yes I agree if your really unhappy then why bother sticking around, but I hope he doesn't think anytime something is not the way he likes it that it means we should end our relationship. That to me, speaks immaturity. Maybe he's learning not to be like that (which it seems that way), or maybe he's just going through another happy phase right now and the minute something shitty happens he'll drift away or become unavailable.
That has to be my biggest fear at the moment.
So that is why I try and stay busy or focus on myself. That seems to be way more attractive then waiting around for him all the time (duh). He also hasn't said "I love you" but has a few times said things like "that's why I do this for the girl I love" or "because I love you". I dunno, it's all day by day.
What would really kill me is if he moves in for a while then decides he's tired of it. Ugh, I have to stop worrying about the future.