{Gomenasai 'til the end, I never needed a friend like I do now}
Last night, after my overwhelming conversation about some kittens, I realized I got a bit too much carried away. I wasn't very kind towards some people. For that, I would like to apologize.
Lately, I don't really act like myself, which is quite scary and definitely not an excuse for my behavior. I can only blame one person for this, who is at the same time not to blame. I know, it seems confused and it is, even for me. Even after 2 years and 9 months. I'm still looking for answers though I know I will never get them.
So last night, I had another interesting conversation with one of my best friend. Someone I know since a long time and who I trust with my life. No secret for anyone here that I like Stéphane. My friend strangely told me it had certainly something to do with the fact he's Swiss. Which is true, somehow. And because he reminds me of my friend Gaetan. Which is shockingly true too. And I don't know if it's such a good thing. They bear the same kindness in their hearts, the same genuine smile on their faces, the same purity or fire in their eyes and yet... they are so different. So sometimes, when I watch one of Stéphane's program, I get emotional and cry. Sometimes, when he does something silly no one else would pay attention too, I burst out in tears. Because he reminds me of him. I still hurt from this loss. I will probably hurt for a while before it soften.
When I think of my friend Gaetan, I can't not see those lyrics play in my mind:
♫ There was a boy, a very strange,
Enchanted boy.
They say He wandered very far
Very far, over land and sea.
A little shy and sad of eye
But very wise was he.
And then one day
A magic day he came my way.
And has we spoke of many things
Fools and Kings
This he said to me :
"The greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return" ♪
