Public Service Announcement

[pinkhollywood]

Recently a new mental condition has been brought into the lime light. I am writing this today because my own fiance suffers from this horrible condition. He has been diagnosed with Disproportionate Intellectually Conceited Kid Syndrome, or D.I.C.K. Syndrome. Common symptoms can be characterized by know-it-all-ism, delusions of grandeur, and the common "I Win" Disorder. The most notable sufferer of D.I.C.K. Syndrome is Jeff Goldblum. While he has achieved almost nothing in his professional career, he is still convinced that "he wins" at everything. If you know someone who may be suffering from D.I.C.K. Syndrome, please do not attempt to help them. In their minds they are in fact "better than you" and could not possibly suffer from any mental defect. Do not argue with them as you cannot "win." Simply let them be and keep in mind that you really are better than them.

This has been a Public Service Announcement sponsored by Heather.