(no subject)
so for a few days.. actually a whole week.. the previous entry was complete bull.. but now.. i mean it again.
why so many ups and downs? why can't we just be together? why do the "scheduling gods" keep us apart by mere half an hours? the old-esque me would probably just believe that it's not meant to be and if it were, it would just happen. but i dont really believe in fated things like that anymore.. i think you have to work at things, put yourself out there.
so that's what i did. and that's what i'll continue to do. unless of course he tells me to just back off or something.. but i kinda think its mutual. or atleast i hope so.
i'm trying to kick ass at my research paper, and so far i think my efforts are paying off, but it's one of the hardets things i've had to do. the whole concept of existentialism is still something that i can't quite get my head around.
things i want::
- love
- italian exchange, pronto!
- spring time
- a delovely 17th
- prom
- summer
- the beach
- a tan
- stress-free happiness