letter
this is the letter i wrote to todd..i just want to keep it cuz its the most thing i ever put some much effort in it..
Dear Todd,
Hey, This is my Christmas letter to you..Things i got on my mind no nothing bad (i know what your thinking). So how’s your Christmas going? hopefully good..did you get what you wanted? Yes you did because you already know what you got lol. How was your families Christmas? hopefully good..
Well I just wanted to tell you how much I love you and why I love you so much..and this is how I had to put it out because It's Amazing... How one person can change your life, How a smile from you can erase everything bad, How life seems less scary when you're holding my hand. It's Odd... How fate brought us together after i thought about you for so long, How did I survived without you, How, whenever I'm with you it's like a great new adventure. It's Beautiful... How love can be so unconditional, How learning about you is like reading my favorite story (sometimes lol). How loving you was and is so easy. And I'm so thankful... That I'm able to know this Amazing Beautiful person and because... I LOVE YOU
You came into my life so quick, A gorgeous pleasant surprise, I hoped you wouldn't give me the cold shoulder when I IMed you, I never thought in a million years I would of got the chance to talk to you or even ever find you, Then, a beautiful friendship did arise. Our bond was so very strong, It couldn't help but turn into love, We wondered if going further was wrong, But we fit each other perfect, Love is a many splendored thing, people say, And I believe it when I finally found you after how many years was it by chance or destiny, The last couple years I have been thinking about you wondering is Todd dead or alive..moved lived in the same place..then I gave up because I was Living my life thinking something that wasn’t there for so long, that I gave up..and when I actually knew I gave up look who’s picture I see on facethejury.. I think what if his s/n wasn’t in his profile? we wouldn’t be together right now. And the first day we talked it was so weird to me you sounded like Todd but a little different I had no idea what to say or how to say it..Then we talked the second time the next day and you called me we talked for like 3 hrs I was like aww..We talked on and off that week..so sweet..and I went home it wasn’t the same because I wanted to talk to you and I knew if I did it was wrong..only because I wanted to be your friend but I knew for some reason it was going further cuz I don’t talk to guys on the phone for 3 hrs unless something is up. I thought about you the whole time I was at the apartment for the week..and me and Damien were getting worse and you were in my mind everywhere..and I wasn’t sure about how you felt and I didn’t care either way at least I knew how Todd was alive..then we hung out and went to the park I still couldn’t believe I was with Todd I felt like something was up because something like this that I wanted for a long time comes true. Guess what's meant to be will always find a way, being by you was so weird I know I keep saying that but I still cant believe it..I talk on the phone with Christine and I tell it every time and she’s I cant believe it either lol..all those times you talked about him and u gave up then he reappears right in front of your face..and I remember the first time I saw you.. you came inside because my mom gave you directions im like holy crap he’s really here..I wasn’t nervous at first then it was like okkkkk now what do I say or do then I couldn’t stop laughing so I didn’t mind after..then we didn’t see each other that whole week..then Friday came and I came over and iv only been in your house once and im like im in Todd’s house..then I meant your mom she was sweet and funny..I kept thinking what is she thinking about me right now since she knows everything that iv done and I felt stupid for doing what I did in the past..I never meant it to go that way..Your dad was quite at first which I felt odd but he has loosen a lot I see and he’s really cool..your brother he’s really cool and really sweet..then Saturday it wasn’t to fun at first because all the drama but I actually was comfortable with you then it got better..I was kinda scared of what might of happen but I just tried to relax..since then its only been 2 days since we never seen each other since we’ve been seeing each other..And the 2 months have been so great I havn’t been this happy in a very very long time and actually mean it. Sometimes we talk and you say all this sweet stuff that makes me want to cry frightens me because im afraid your gonna fill my head up and let me down..Hopefully you don’t do that then I know when I say certain stuff you get mad and you get confused about us because of what I say then I get mad at myself.. Because if I changed your mind or I did anything to ruin this im not sure what I would do.
I try to find the words to express the feeling in my heart; I try to show you that I care, but I don't know where to start. I guess I'll start right here and I guess I'll start right now. I'll tell you that I love you and I'll tell you why and how.Don't know how to explain it, can't really put it into words You've touched my life in so many ways you never cease to amaze me.I don't know what the future holds I can't pretend that I do I just know beyond a doubt I always want you around.Whether we stay the closest of friends or I become the love of your life or maybe even both occurs As long as your in my life I can smile.Something about you makes me smile Not just with my mouth and not just with my eyes But all the way to my soul.Thank you for what you are to me for being who you are and adding happiness to this life And giving me a reason to smile.You're the first thing I think of each morning when I rise. You're the last thing I think of Each night when I close my eyes. You're in each thought I have And every breath I take. My feelings are growing stronger with every move I make and it scares me shitless that I can love someone this much
Now honey, for you, I swear with all my heart I really know that my love is forever true 'till the end of time, I'm in love with you and I know it might be hard to believe because its hard for me to believe but I have to say its true and you might say how do I know well because I have seen you a million times and every time I see you I fall in love with you all over again, my heart starts to race, my frown turns into a smile and all my worries are now in my past, when you smile at me my heart melts, you give the sweetest hugs Every time you hug me, Your smile is like a new day, your sense of humor is like no other, The ability you have to make me smile Is all you need you love me, Just looking in your eyes Makes me melt inside Your lips look so soft Soft enough to kiss You, yourself relive me from all pain Your hands are as soft as a pillow The way you comfort me is amazing Every time we say good-bye I start to cry because im always afraid you went home because you changed your mind about us. I opened my eyes to a vision of you I hope, I prayed for your feelings for a while and they actually came true, You go beyond all limits for me Just to show your love endlessly and i love you for that.You are so special that I wanted you to know I truly, completely love you so much you never will know.
Some say perfection is not real, For most things that's explainable, But in your arms and with your heart's affection I have found a brief moment of perfection.I didn't know I could love anyone as much as I love you for the sound of your voice, makes all my dreams come true because i thought about it so often and now your here.Have you ever felt Like your heart was going to melt when you see a certain somebody? This isn't just anybody Not to you anyways. You know that it's not a faze You know your scared to feel this way But you do everyday! You think about them every second of every minute You can't help it! Everytime you pass them or touch them you feel like you are about to die because your heart beats so fast. Have you ever been around someone and just couldn't think? Have you ever been around someone together forever you wish to be? well actually neither did i until you and yes i thought once i felt this way, but i honestly can say I haven’t and if i did it was not this strong..im not sure why yet that i loved you so fast and so much but i do and i cant help it in the beginning i actually tried not to afraid of what might happen but i said this is Todd Hilliker i told myself if i got him in my arms I wasn’t gonna let go unless he wanted me to let go.
I love you more than words could ever say, All this love I feel Has never felt so real, Love so strong, and so true, This wonderful feeling you have given me makes me want to be with you forever, I love the way you let me know How much you love me,The love you show to me is beyond anything, I hate to see you mad, I hate to see you sad, It makes me feel so bad I would hate to ever see you cry, I'm sorry I sometimes do the things I do and say the things i say, Don't worry you're the only one for me, You, and I, and everyone else can see I love you with all my heart..Other reason why i know im in love because to be in love is where your heart races when you see them, When you ache when they are not there, When you want them to come back so badly, to be in love is when your head can only think about them. Every song reminds you of every special moment you've had with them, to be in love is where only your future is all that matters, You see them in your arms forever and ever. When I am wrapped up in your arms,I feel safer than ever before, When I am close to you I am overwhelmed with happiness.Love used to be at the back of my mind, Dead and lifeless, Then you came along and showed me love is beautiful, You brought me to life, so strong.
That day that I saw you standing in my living room, my heart melted.i dont know if it was a crush or love or like or friends but i found out It was true love, because I felt it. You changed my life in so many ways. Some of them I can't even explain to you. I have to ask you this because i dont see how maybe you can explain How is it that you make me feel this way? Like my heart is flying. Like I'm actually soaring. Like my soul is singing. You do something to me, Though I'm not sure exactly what, That makes me always feel happy, I spend a long time thinking of you of how you would make me feel. I'm not sure how to describe it. Is this even real? Because it's amazing to me That I can feel like this after such a short time.I hate that Love is something that is not easily explained, no one word can express it And no one person feels the same about it, It’s waking up in the morning wanting to be with that one person And going to bed feeling the same way It’s knowing that you want to spend the rest of your life with him But to just hear those three little words come from his mouth And actually know he means it That’s the best feeling in the world To know that someone loves you for you And wants to be with you forever Love is hard to find, and even harder to keep It takes time and effort to keep it going But you don’t mind because you would do anything in the world to keep it It’s that last conversation of the night before you fall asleep He’s the first one you want when you wake up The only thing that’s on your mind all day, every day It's knowing that someone’s always there for you to cry on, Someone’s always there for you to talk to about anything and won’t judge you for that, It’s the person you feel the most comfortable with in the world And to know that you have that, That you share that special bond with one other person That’s the best feeling in the world. Not only do I want to tell you how much I love you, I want to show you. You are one of the reasons why I live, the reason my heart keeps beating. Without you my life would be not be good at all. I never knew I could love someone as much as I love and need you. Please know I'll never be able to love anyone as much as I love you. You're the only one for me. And that's the way it will always be. Without you my heart would be empty and incomplete. Every memory I have of you I treasure. Every thought of you is wonderful. Thank you for the love you have given me. Thank you for the lesson of my life I will never forget. Thank you, love of my life.
Sometimes we argue, I don't know why. Then I sit and wonder, why do I cry? I cry because I love you, I cry because I care, I cry because I feel we have so much love, sometimes I'm afraid I'll turn around and you won't be there.
I love you every minute, I love you every day, I even love you when we argue, I love you when we play.Sometimes I've wondered do you love me too, then I look in your eyes and I know it's true. So when I say something a little crazy or I do something you don't feel is right, Please, let's try to work it out so we won't fight. Some people take relationships for granted it's sad to hear but true, I don't want this to happen, not with you. I want our relationship to be completely from the heart so we both know, no matter what we go through we will end. Always in my heart you make me feel more loved than I've ever felt and happier than I've ever dreamed. The love and understanding you have is something I have searched for my entire life. Always in my happiest and saddest moments, you are my best friend I come to you for everything, and you listen to me without judgment. Always, deep within my soul, I know we have a love like no other. What we share is something others only hope for and dream of, Our love is magical beyond belief. Always and forever you will be my dream come true, the one I have waited for all these years. I wear you sweater because i get cold and your sweater has your cologne smell and it reminds me of you so i wear it, i bet you didnt know that. I do want you to know... I will always love you, That you are all I have ever long for, And crave, and yearn... That you are the man of my dreams, The one I have searched all my life, That every day, more and more, I'm falling deeply in love with you!
I promise to be your warm spot to cuddle up to when you feel cold
I promise to be your soft place to land if you should fall
I promise to be the first one to say I am sorry (even if I was right)
I promise to be there for you in all of your times of joy and sorrow
I promise to support you no matter what your decision (even if I don't agree )
I promise to make a new memory with you each and every day
I promise to love you without change
I promise to make you laugh
I promise to not make you cry
I promise to give you strength when you are weak
I promise to love you forever
I promise to cherish you and your love
I promise to compromise with you
I promise to make you and our children my first priority
I promise to never take your love for granted
I promise to never lose faith in you
I promise to never give you a reason to distrust me
I promise to always trust you
I promise to work with you to resolve our conflicts
I promise to always be proud of you
I promise to never let you feel alone in this world
I promise to find new ways everyday to keep the fires of passion burning
I promise to be the best mom I can to our children
I promise to always keep you as an equal partner
I promise to never say things to you in anger
I promise to be your partner for life
I promise you a love everlasting.
Love
Nicole
Always n Forever
No Matter What
Dear Todd,
Hey, This is my Christmas letter to you..Things i got on my mind no nothing bad (i know what your thinking). So how’s your Christmas going? hopefully good..did you get what you wanted? Yes you did because you already know what you got lol. How was your families Christmas? hopefully good..
Well I just wanted to tell you how much I love you and why I love you so much..and this is how I had to put it out because It's Amazing... How one person can change your life, How a smile from you can erase everything bad, How life seems less scary when you're holding my hand. It's Odd... How fate brought us together after i thought about you for so long, How did I survived without you, How, whenever I'm with you it's like a great new adventure. It's Beautiful... How love can be so unconditional, How learning about you is like reading my favorite story (sometimes lol). How loving you was and is so easy. And I'm so thankful... That I'm able to know this Amazing Beautiful person and because... I LOVE YOU
You came into my life so quick, A gorgeous pleasant surprise, I hoped you wouldn't give me the cold shoulder when I IMed you, I never thought in a million years I would of got the chance to talk to you or even ever find you, Then, a beautiful friendship did arise. Our bond was so very strong, It couldn't help but turn into love, We wondered if going further was wrong, But we fit each other perfect, Love is a many splendored thing, people say, And I believe it when I finally found you after how many years was it by chance or destiny, The last couple years I have been thinking about you wondering is Todd dead or alive..moved lived in the same place..then I gave up because I was Living my life thinking something that wasn’t there for so long, that I gave up..and when I actually knew I gave up look who’s picture I see on facethejury.. I think what if his s/n wasn’t in his profile? we wouldn’t be together right now. And the first day we talked it was so weird to me you sounded like Todd but a little different I had no idea what to say or how to say it..Then we talked the second time the next day and you called me we talked for like 3 hrs I was like aww..We talked on and off that week..so sweet..and I went home it wasn’t the same because I wanted to talk to you and I knew if I did it was wrong..only because I wanted to be your friend but I knew for some reason it was going further cuz I don’t talk to guys on the phone for 3 hrs unless something is up. I thought about you the whole time I was at the apartment for the week..and me and Damien were getting worse and you were in my mind everywhere..and I wasn’t sure about how you felt and I didn’t care either way at least I knew how Todd was alive..then we hung out and went to the park I still couldn’t believe I was with Todd I felt like something was up because something like this that I wanted for a long time comes true. Guess what's meant to be will always find a way, being by you was so weird I know I keep saying that but I still cant believe it..I talk on the phone with Christine and I tell it every time and she’s I cant believe it either lol..all those times you talked about him and u gave up then he reappears right in front of your face..and I remember the first time I saw you.. you came inside because my mom gave you directions im like holy crap he’s really here..I wasn’t nervous at first then it was like okkkkk now what do I say or do then I couldn’t stop laughing so I didn’t mind after..then we didn’t see each other that whole week..then Friday came and I came over and iv only been in your house once and im like im in Todd’s house..then I meant your mom she was sweet and funny..I kept thinking what is she thinking about me right now since she knows everything that iv done and I felt stupid for doing what I did in the past..I never meant it to go that way..Your dad was quite at first which I felt odd but he has loosen a lot I see and he’s really cool..your brother he’s really cool and really sweet..then Saturday it wasn’t to fun at first because all the drama but I actually was comfortable with you then it got better..I was kinda scared of what might of happen but I just tried to relax..since then its only been 2 days since we never seen each other since we’ve been seeing each other..And the 2 months have been so great I havn’t been this happy in a very very long time and actually mean it. Sometimes we talk and you say all this sweet stuff that makes me want to cry frightens me because im afraid your gonna fill my head up and let me down..Hopefully you don’t do that then I know when I say certain stuff you get mad and you get confused about us because of what I say then I get mad at myself.. Because if I changed your mind or I did anything to ruin this im not sure what I would do.
I try to find the words to express the feeling in my heart; I try to show you that I care, but I don't know where to start. I guess I'll start right here and I guess I'll start right now. I'll tell you that I love you and I'll tell you why and how.Don't know how to explain it, can't really put it into words You've touched my life in so many ways you never cease to amaze me.I don't know what the future holds I can't pretend that I do I just know beyond a doubt I always want you around.Whether we stay the closest of friends or I become the love of your life or maybe even both occurs As long as your in my life I can smile.Something about you makes me smile Not just with my mouth and not just with my eyes But all the way to my soul.Thank you for what you are to me for being who you are and adding happiness to this life And giving me a reason to smile.You're the first thing I think of each morning when I rise. You're the last thing I think of Each night when I close my eyes. You're in each thought I have And every breath I take. My feelings are growing stronger with every move I make and it scares me shitless that I can love someone this much
Now honey, for you, I swear with all my heart I really know that my love is forever true 'till the end of time, I'm in love with you and I know it might be hard to believe because its hard for me to believe but I have to say its true and you might say how do I know well because I have seen you a million times and every time I see you I fall in love with you all over again, my heart starts to race, my frown turns into a smile and all my worries are now in my past, when you smile at me my heart melts, you give the sweetest hugs Every time you hug me, Your smile is like a new day, your sense of humor is like no other, The ability you have to make me smile Is all you need you love me, Just looking in your eyes Makes me melt inside Your lips look so soft Soft enough to kiss You, yourself relive me from all pain Your hands are as soft as a pillow The way you comfort me is amazing Every time we say good-bye I start to cry because im always afraid you went home because you changed your mind about us. I opened my eyes to a vision of you I hope, I prayed for your feelings for a while and they actually came true, You go beyond all limits for me Just to show your love endlessly and i love you for that.You are so special that I wanted you to know I truly, completely love you so much you never will know.
Some say perfection is not real, For most things that's explainable, But in your arms and with your heart's affection I have found a brief moment of perfection.I didn't know I could love anyone as much as I love you for the sound of your voice, makes all my dreams come true because i thought about it so often and now your here.Have you ever felt Like your heart was going to melt when you see a certain somebody? This isn't just anybody Not to you anyways. You know that it's not a faze You know your scared to feel this way But you do everyday! You think about them every second of every minute You can't help it! Everytime you pass them or touch them you feel like you are about to die because your heart beats so fast. Have you ever been around someone and just couldn't think? Have you ever been around someone together forever you wish to be? well actually neither did i until you and yes i thought once i felt this way, but i honestly can say I haven’t and if i did it was not this strong..im not sure why yet that i loved you so fast and so much but i do and i cant help it in the beginning i actually tried not to afraid of what might happen but i said this is Todd Hilliker i told myself if i got him in my arms I wasn’t gonna let go unless he wanted me to let go.
I love you more than words could ever say, All this love I feel Has never felt so real, Love so strong, and so true, This wonderful feeling you have given me makes me want to be with you forever, I love the way you let me know How much you love me,The love you show to me is beyond anything, I hate to see you mad, I hate to see you sad, It makes me feel so bad I would hate to ever see you cry, I'm sorry I sometimes do the things I do and say the things i say, Don't worry you're the only one for me, You, and I, and everyone else can see I love you with all my heart..Other reason why i know im in love because to be in love is where your heart races when you see them, When you ache when they are not there, When you want them to come back so badly, to be in love is when your head can only think about them. Every song reminds you of every special moment you've had with them, to be in love is where only your future is all that matters, You see them in your arms forever and ever. When I am wrapped up in your arms,I feel safer than ever before, When I am close to you I am overwhelmed with happiness.Love used to be at the back of my mind, Dead and lifeless, Then you came along and showed me love is beautiful, You brought me to life, so strong.
That day that I saw you standing in my living room, my heart melted.i dont know if it was a crush or love or like or friends but i found out It was true love, because I felt it. You changed my life in so many ways. Some of them I can't even explain to you. I have to ask you this because i dont see how maybe you can explain How is it that you make me feel this way? Like my heart is flying. Like I'm actually soaring. Like my soul is singing. You do something to me, Though I'm not sure exactly what, That makes me always feel happy, I spend a long time thinking of you of how you would make me feel. I'm not sure how to describe it. Is this even real? Because it's amazing to me That I can feel like this after such a short time.I hate that Love is something that is not easily explained, no one word can express it And no one person feels the same about it, It’s waking up in the morning wanting to be with that one person And going to bed feeling the same way It’s knowing that you want to spend the rest of your life with him But to just hear those three little words come from his mouth And actually know he means it That’s the best feeling in the world To know that someone loves you for you And wants to be with you forever Love is hard to find, and even harder to keep It takes time and effort to keep it going But you don’t mind because you would do anything in the world to keep it It’s that last conversation of the night before you fall asleep He’s the first one you want when you wake up The only thing that’s on your mind all day, every day It's knowing that someone’s always there for you to cry on, Someone’s always there for you to talk to about anything and won’t judge you for that, It’s the person you feel the most comfortable with in the world And to know that you have that, That you share that special bond with one other person That’s the best feeling in the world. Not only do I want to tell you how much I love you, I want to show you. You are one of the reasons why I live, the reason my heart keeps beating. Without you my life would be not be good at all. I never knew I could love someone as much as I love and need you. Please know I'll never be able to love anyone as much as I love you. You're the only one for me. And that's the way it will always be. Without you my heart would be empty and incomplete. Every memory I have of you I treasure. Every thought of you is wonderful. Thank you for the love you have given me. Thank you for the lesson of my life I will never forget. Thank you, love of my life.
Sometimes we argue, I don't know why. Then I sit and wonder, why do I cry? I cry because I love you, I cry because I care, I cry because I feel we have so much love, sometimes I'm afraid I'll turn around and you won't be there.
I love you every minute, I love you every day, I even love you when we argue, I love you when we play.Sometimes I've wondered do you love me too, then I look in your eyes and I know it's true. So when I say something a little crazy or I do something you don't feel is right, Please, let's try to work it out so we won't fight. Some people take relationships for granted it's sad to hear but true, I don't want this to happen, not with you. I want our relationship to be completely from the heart so we both know, no matter what we go through we will end. Always in my heart you make me feel more loved than I've ever felt and happier than I've ever dreamed. The love and understanding you have is something I have searched for my entire life. Always in my happiest and saddest moments, you are my best friend I come to you for everything, and you listen to me without judgment. Always, deep within my soul, I know we have a love like no other. What we share is something others only hope for and dream of, Our love is magical beyond belief. Always and forever you will be my dream come true, the one I have waited for all these years. I wear you sweater because i get cold and your sweater has your cologne smell and it reminds me of you so i wear it, i bet you didnt know that. I do want you to know... I will always love you, That you are all I have ever long for, And crave, and yearn... That you are the man of my dreams, The one I have searched all my life, That every day, more and more, I'm falling deeply in love with you!
I promise to be your warm spot to cuddle up to when you feel cold
I promise to be your soft place to land if you should fall
I promise to be the first one to say I am sorry (even if I was right)
I promise to be there for you in all of your times of joy and sorrow
I promise to support you no matter what your decision (even if I don't agree )
I promise to make a new memory with you each and every day
I promise to love you without change
I promise to make you laugh
I promise to not make you cry
I promise to give you strength when you are weak
I promise to love you forever
I promise to cherish you and your love
I promise to compromise with you
I promise to make you and our children my first priority
I promise to never take your love for granted
I promise to never lose faith in you
I promise to never give you a reason to distrust me
I promise to always trust you
I promise to work with you to resolve our conflicts
I promise to always be proud of you
I promise to never let you feel alone in this world
I promise to find new ways everyday to keep the fires of passion burning
I promise to be the best mom I can to our children
I promise to always keep you as an equal partner
I promise to never say things to you in anger
I promise to be your partner for life
I promise you a love everlasting.
Love
Nicole
Always n Forever
No Matter What