(no subject)
Kind of bored. Tired. =) Amused....but stir crazy. Need something to do. Don't want to go do the one thing that there is to do with friends tonight -- which is go to see the movie at the Holly.
It was really depressing to go through and read some livejournals today. People are all depressed and confused left and right and they want to leave and they want love and they are discontented with themselves. It’s really sad. Horribly sad because I know exactly how it feels…I’ve been there and all… but then in a way I really pity them too because I don’t think that one has to dwell in that sort of realm all the time. There really is a way to extricate yourself from junk like that. I’m not sure that it could be outlined in three easy steps, but I know it can be done. I think actors are among some of the most dramatic people in the world. Almost punny, eh? Honestly, I’ve never seen a group of people so consumed by the undulations of their emotions and the emotions of others. It reminds me why communism is a bad thing. Drama Drama Drama!!! I genuinely like theater people…. Except when I read their live journals. Then, honestly, sometimes I want to send them nasty comments that say “Oh please!!!!! You were saying the exact same thing last year. Can’t you find something else to gripe about? Can’t you get over it? Can’t you move on?” ---- Then I think about how very very much I appreciated people who did not say that kind of thing to me when I was stuck in the vicious cycle of depression. I really admire people who are loving enough to be truly compassionate on those who are struggling emotionally. I am honestly a wicked and brutal and harsh person. I realize that. I cringe when I have the urge to “slap sense” into people who are bemoaning things that don’t seem to be reasonable at all. I am really sickened and convicted by my natural tendancy to be heartless. I want to be compassionate and caring…but I want to balance it with truth. I really really appreciate people who have mastered the delicate art of being truthful and honest as well as compassionate and caring. It’s such a beautiful thing. I’ve gotten much better. Honestly I have. I struggle with prideful heartlessness much less than I used to. Rarely now….
Hmm… these musings have helped me to feel a little bit better. It’s good to muse! =D haha. I really enjoy it. I have about 30 minutes to decide if I want to go cook and eat dinner with Mary Baxter, Elizabeth, and somebody whose name begins with an “S”. La la….what shall the Blair decide to do today?
By the way…..driving is my best friend!!!
Those who have been to college please read and commentI think I have decided what I’m going to do about school. Not ABSOLUTELY decided that this will be my course of action, but it’s appealing to me. Through all of my college visits Furman seems to be the very best fit for what I am looking for. I still have several more to look out included Davidson and Queens….but I’m really strongly leaning toward Furman. I think what I’m going to do is this: After finishing all my visitations if Furman is still at the top of my list I will simply apply with “early decision”. If I don’t get accepted I will go to NGSCU for another year, knock out all of my core courses and kind of take it easy….cause NGCSU academics are not very strenuous. *shrug * I don’t really know…. Any comments or pointers or directions from people who have already “been there and done that” would be greatly appreciated. AHH! College decisions!!! They’ll be the death of me. Hehehe. Kidding. I really enjoy it. College life is where I want to spend the rest of my existence. As I tell my mom - I want to be an English professor NOW!!! Haha. =S silly pickle.
May your decisiveness never fluctuate as mine does! May your houses never be hit by trees in hurricane weather. May your karate instructor never pair you with a man four times your size who attempts to break your wrist. May your nose hair remain short even in old age….and most of all…..umm… may you play hooky from ballet so that you can go to BSU on Monday. And all God’s people said….. Amen.
Blair Schermerhorn
It was really depressing to go through and read some livejournals today. People are all depressed and confused left and right and they want to leave and they want love and they are discontented with themselves. It’s really sad. Horribly sad because I know exactly how it feels…I’ve been there and all… but then in a way I really pity them too because I don’t think that one has to dwell in that sort of realm all the time. There really is a way to extricate yourself from junk like that. I’m not sure that it could be outlined in three easy steps, but I know it can be done. I think actors are among some of the most dramatic people in the world. Almost punny, eh? Honestly, I’ve never seen a group of people so consumed by the undulations of their emotions and the emotions of others. It reminds me why communism is a bad thing. Drama Drama Drama!!! I genuinely like theater people…. Except when I read their live journals. Then, honestly, sometimes I want to send them nasty comments that say “Oh please!!!!! You were saying the exact same thing last year. Can’t you find something else to gripe about? Can’t you get over it? Can’t you move on?” ---- Then I think about how very very much I appreciated people who did not say that kind of thing to me when I was stuck in the vicious cycle of depression. I really admire people who are loving enough to be truly compassionate on those who are struggling emotionally. I am honestly a wicked and brutal and harsh person. I realize that. I cringe when I have the urge to “slap sense” into people who are bemoaning things that don’t seem to be reasonable at all. I am really sickened and convicted by my natural tendancy to be heartless. I want to be compassionate and caring…but I want to balance it with truth. I really really appreciate people who have mastered the delicate art of being truthful and honest as well as compassionate and caring. It’s such a beautiful thing. I’ve gotten much better. Honestly I have. I struggle with prideful heartlessness much less than I used to. Rarely now….
Hmm… these musings have helped me to feel a little bit better. It’s good to muse! =D haha. I really enjoy it. I have about 30 minutes to decide if I want to go cook and eat dinner with Mary Baxter, Elizabeth, and somebody whose name begins with an “S”. La la….what shall the Blair decide to do today?
By the way…..driving is my best friend!!!
Those who have been to college please read and commentI think I have decided what I’m going to do about school. Not ABSOLUTELY decided that this will be my course of action, but it’s appealing to me. Through all of my college visits Furman seems to be the very best fit for what I am looking for. I still have several more to look out included Davidson and Queens….but I’m really strongly leaning toward Furman. I think what I’m going to do is this: After finishing all my visitations if Furman is still at the top of my list I will simply apply with “early decision”. If I don’t get accepted I will go to NGSCU for another year, knock out all of my core courses and kind of take it easy….cause NGCSU academics are not very strenuous. *shrug * I don’t really know…. Any comments or pointers or directions from people who have already “been there and done that” would be greatly appreciated. AHH! College decisions!!! They’ll be the death of me. Hehehe. Kidding. I really enjoy it. College life is where I want to spend the rest of my existence. As I tell my mom - I want to be an English professor NOW!!! Haha. =S silly pickle.
May your decisiveness never fluctuate as mine does! May your houses never be hit by trees in hurricane weather. May your karate instructor never pair you with a man four times your size who attempts to break your wrist. May your nose hair remain short even in old age….and most of all…..umm… may you play hooky from ballet so that you can go to BSU on Monday. And all God’s people said….. Amen.
Blair Schermerhorn