(no subject)
October. 2011. a year I will never forget.
there are a lot of hearts that were broken... a lot of silly moments.. if I wrote it all out it would be a scathing picture of what I can and cannot be.
if there is one thing I have learnt about myself over the years its that I actually take my relationships (be them friends or more) into consideration more than anything else... I think the people around me who I have loved have defined who I am so I speak of them a lot... Love its what I do... Its what I know.
So lets talk about Burningman last year. I met someone there... someone that at the time I thought was rockemsockem amazing... the kind of amazing that lifts you up and throws your head for a whirl at the same time. I was wrong... He was just a guy. NOT surprised.
this last winter when I got back to school I started seeing Tom... old roommate... probably didnt write about him because I dont write in here much... or ever. ANYWAYS. he and I Had a vapid affair... He made it clear that I was... ugly, stupid, worthless, ugly, ugly, etc. I don't quite understand why I stuck around for so long with him but I did... I suppose the living with him part was a huge factor in keeping him on my list of lovelies.
in the mean time (as it wasnt a relationship it was casual sex) I was spending a lot of time with one of my ex's Aiden and falling pretty head over heels for him again... also trying to end it with Mike (the ape) who frankly... was just a jerk. Really great in the sack but HOLY SHIT was he ever bad for me.... anyways...
I honestly dont know where to end this.
there are a lot of hearts that were broken... a lot of silly moments.. if I wrote it all out it would be a scathing picture of what I can and cannot be.
if there is one thing I have learnt about myself over the years its that I actually take my relationships (be them friends or more) into consideration more than anything else... I think the people around me who I have loved have defined who I am so I speak of them a lot... Love its what I do... Its what I know.
So lets talk about Burningman last year. I met someone there... someone that at the time I thought was rockemsockem amazing... the kind of amazing that lifts you up and throws your head for a whirl at the same time. I was wrong... He was just a guy. NOT surprised.
this last winter when I got back to school I started seeing Tom... old roommate... probably didnt write about him because I dont write in here much... or ever. ANYWAYS. he and I Had a vapid affair... He made it clear that I was... ugly, stupid, worthless, ugly, ugly, etc. I don't quite understand why I stuck around for so long with him but I did... I suppose the living with him part was a huge factor in keeping him on my list of lovelies.
in the mean time (as it wasnt a relationship it was casual sex) I was spending a lot of time with one of my ex's Aiden and falling pretty head over heels for him again... also trying to end it with Mike (the ape) who frankly... was just a jerk. Really great in the sack but HOLY SHIT was he ever bad for me.... anyways...
I honestly dont know where to end this.