Sunday
13:03 Two beautifully grey doves w/ black necklace collars outside my granny's window. Its -10 centigrade outside, but we're going to go out of town. Now two smaller birds are outside the window. The snow, the black crows on it. Got to love 'em.
13:33 On our way to the mother nature. We're actually going to stock up on some very tasty spring water. Doesn’t it just sound nice, spring water. Two more months of winter. And holidays too. Granny's so happy. Told us she will dine with grandpa today, who passed away like 16 years ago. Told us she will light a candle and he will come over. So happy, shiny face). Its funny how some people idealize others once they pass away. That's not granny though.
18:31 I’m just not going to go into any detail as to the twist of my relations with Natali. I’m just where I started. Whatever. I’ve been there before. So. Nothing. So. A few tears. So. Some emotions. So. So its important not to lock up inside now, stay open. Just makes me stronger. Just makes me more independent. It’s the New Year and I will definitely turn my life around. This time. With or without her. I fear a piece of me will always belong to her and I don’t want to hurt that sweetheart, that new girl, which I’ll be dating. Why? I just know somehow that Natali will want and will come back. And if she doesn’t its only for the better. The most unpleasant is that I’m locking up my emotions and its not good. When I do so, I remind myself of someone older, much older than I actually am. I don’t want this kind of aging. Then I should treat this simpler. So shall it be.
18:43 Seriously, when I asked her for a second chance her motivation was that she doesn’t want to get attached, meaning that she could. Then I’ll be there for you, Natali. It will just be my way.)
13:33 On our way to the mother nature. We're actually going to stock up on some very tasty spring water. Doesn’t it just sound nice, spring water. Two more months of winter. And holidays too. Granny's so happy. Told us she will dine with grandpa today, who passed away like 16 years ago. Told us she will light a candle and he will come over. So happy, shiny face). Its funny how some people idealize others once they pass away. That's not granny though.
18:31 I’m just not going to go into any detail as to the twist of my relations with Natali. I’m just where I started. Whatever. I’ve been there before. So. Nothing. So. A few tears. So. Some emotions. So. So its important not to lock up inside now, stay open. Just makes me stronger. Just makes me more independent. It’s the New Year and I will definitely turn my life around. This time. With or without her. I fear a piece of me will always belong to her and I don’t want to hurt that sweetheart, that new girl, which I’ll be dating. Why? I just know somehow that Natali will want and will come back. And if she doesn’t its only for the better. The most unpleasant is that I’m locking up my emotions and its not good. When I do so, I remind myself of someone older, much older than I actually am. I don’t want this kind of aging. Then I should treat this simpler. So shall it be.
18:43 Seriously, when I asked her for a second chance her motivation was that she doesn’t want to get attached, meaning that she could. Then I’ll be there for you, Natali. It will just be my way.)