Things You Do When You Live Alone & Don't Have A Steady Girlfriend:
* Rinse out your boxers in a sink using dishwasher detergent, then hang them on the back of a chair to dry.
* Treat the kitchen table and counter as workbenches, leaving tools and parts out next to your food for days at a time.
* Buy new clothes to avoid doing that huge pile of laundry.
* Experiment with ramen. I've learned to make a mean chili-flavored mac & cheese ramen casserole.
* Turn the cover of a CD spindle into a bowl for your cereal, cuz you're too lazy to wash the dishes.
* Drink out of anything that will hold liquid -- rinsed-out shampoo bottles, re-used beer bottles, those giant bulk-sized aspirin containers they sell at Costco...
* Take furniture that's being thrown out and use it to furnish your own place.
* Sleep on a bare mattress with no sheets and one blanket for months, just because you don't feel like setting up a bed.
* Collect bags of condiments from various eateries and leave them scattered across the living space.
* Dry your hands on your cat.
* Let cat vomit dry on the carpet, so you can just scrape it off with your shoe. (PRO TIP - this
never left a stain.)
* Cut yourself? Wrap a sock around the wound and hold it in place with duct tape. Who needs bandages, or medical attention?
* Cover up stains on a carpet by buying a new rug to drape over it, instead of cleaning the stain.
* Set up a tent on your roof or balcony for "urban campouts."
* Piss in the sink.
* Use things besides toilet paper as toilet paper.
...I like to believe I'm much classier than that now.
* Treat the kitchen table and counter as workbenches, leaving tools and parts out next to your food for days at a time.
* Buy new clothes to avoid doing that huge pile of laundry.
* Experiment with ramen. I've learned to make a mean chili-flavored mac & cheese ramen casserole.
* Turn the cover of a CD spindle into a bowl for your cereal, cuz you're too lazy to wash the dishes.
* Drink out of anything that will hold liquid -- rinsed-out shampoo bottles, re-used beer bottles, those giant bulk-sized aspirin containers they sell at Costco...
* Take furniture that's being thrown out and use it to furnish your own place.
* Sleep on a bare mattress with no sheets and one blanket for months, just because you don't feel like setting up a bed.
* Collect bags of condiments from various eateries and leave them scattered across the living space.
* Dry your hands on your cat.
* Let cat vomit dry on the carpet, so you can just scrape it off with your shoe. (PRO TIP - this
never left a stain.)
* Cut yourself? Wrap a sock around the wound and hold it in place with duct tape. Who needs bandages, or medical attention?
* Cover up stains on a carpet by buying a new rug to drape over it, instead of cleaning the stain.
* Set up a tent on your roof or balcony for "urban campouts."
* Piss in the sink.
* Use things besides toilet paper as toilet paper.
...I like to believe I'm much classier than that now.