(no subject)
It's no secret to most people that're familiar with my music tastes that my favorite band is Assemblage 23. Not just because the music is bouncy and upbeat, yet dark, but because the lyrics're usually a lot more.. intelligent than most songs, in any genre nowadays, and more often than not, I can relate to them. So. Off the latest album, Storm (it's a year old but I'm a slacker), there was a track that.. to me.. signified that no matter how horrible things're going, there's always another day.. that life progresses and pushes through whatever might be happening, and that you will survive it. Lyrics below.. obviously.
Be still
Though chaos rains
Around you now
Only so much rain
Can fall at once
Breathe in
And let the air envelop you
And slow but sure
Serenity will come
Close your eyes
Try to breathe
Feel the ground
Beneath your feet
It's still there
The world still turns around
Stand up
Though circumstance
Has knocked you down
There is nothing gained
By staying within its reach
Take strength
In every failure you endure
Our mistakes
Have many lessons they can teach
Close your eyes
Try to breathe
Feel the ground
Beneath your feet
It's still there
The world still turns around
Destroy these walls
You've built around yourself
You can't take another step
Until they're gone
Move out
No use in dwelling
In the past
Bid farewell to all your fears
And carry on
Close your eyes
Try to breathe
Feel the ground
Beneath your feet
It's still there
The world still turns around
I was thinking of that song after talking to Paige last night. She commented on how, at the beginning of the year, I was "on top of the world", always happy (even without the Cymbalta).. and then somewhere between there and here, I lost it. I progressively became more pessimistic, like I used to be. I looked at the worst in a potential situation, without weighing in the positives to balance it out, because I had the belief that the bad always outdoes the good.. although, I'll probably always believe that. If a woman marries a guy, that buys her whatever she wants, gets along great with family, houses them in a huge house and starts a famiy--everything a woman is "known" to typically want--it doesn't make it worth it if the guy beats the wife and sexually molests their children. At least I hope it doesn't.
I guess what happened is I let all the negativity around me bear me down after a while and lost the edge of perseverence I've prided myself on. I dwelled on things too far, thought too far into it, read things that weren't there to be read and complicate any situation I was thrown into. I'd even go as far as admitting a bit of narrow-mindedness, in regards to people just from a little I know of them. Everyone is guilty of this, though. Would I judge someone just by them saying, "I'm a member of the Church of Satan?" Absolutely. Would I judge someone for being a Christian, Muslim, Buddhist, or.. whatever a practitioner of Hindu or Shinto is? Absolutely not. I have a thing against the Church of Satan, though. Any religion founded by a man who plagiarized his 'bible' from a book written in the 1890's, beat his dogs with 2x4's, and set up his daughter for rape is not going to get my respect.
So. With all this said, do I have any intentions for the New Year? Probably not. Making a New Year's resolution dooms it to failure each and every time.. perhaps because you try so hard at it? I dunno. I know what I want to do, but I'm not going to say, "I am going to make this happen." However, what I'd like to happen over the course of the next 12 months would be.. to somehow inspire my artistic imagination. I'm struggling to finish my old stiple, but I've made a lot of progress this month. I'd alsobe happy if my general mood and outlook on the world lightened up, but see, that's one of the things that you can't just "make happen".. but if I stumble upon the secret to it, I'll let you all know. And as vain as this one sounds, I'd like to acquire a weight of between 150-160 that is primarily muscle. *smirk* At least I aim low and realistically, and don't tempt fate by saying, "I'd love to have The Rock's physique without all the years of training!", because I'd have to start popping steroids.. and my dick'd shrivel up. *sniff*
This should be my last post before the New Year.. I won't be home much on Saturday. So. Drink up, be merry! It's a celebration, bitches <3
Be still
Though chaos rains
Around you now
Only so much rain
Can fall at once
Breathe in
And let the air envelop you
And slow but sure
Serenity will come
Close your eyes
Try to breathe
Feel the ground
Beneath your feet
It's still there
The world still turns around
Stand up
Though circumstance
Has knocked you down
There is nothing gained
By staying within its reach
Take strength
In every failure you endure
Our mistakes
Have many lessons they can teach
Close your eyes
Try to breathe
Feel the ground
Beneath your feet
It's still there
The world still turns around
Destroy these walls
You've built around yourself
You can't take another step
Until they're gone
Move out
No use in dwelling
In the past
Bid farewell to all your fears
And carry on
Close your eyes
Try to breathe
Feel the ground
Beneath your feet
It's still there
The world still turns around
I was thinking of that song after talking to Paige last night. She commented on how, at the beginning of the year, I was "on top of the world", always happy (even without the Cymbalta).. and then somewhere between there and here, I lost it. I progressively became more pessimistic, like I used to be. I looked at the worst in a potential situation, without weighing in the positives to balance it out, because I had the belief that the bad always outdoes the good.. although, I'll probably always believe that. If a woman marries a guy, that buys her whatever she wants, gets along great with family, houses them in a huge house and starts a famiy--everything a woman is "known" to typically want--it doesn't make it worth it if the guy beats the wife and sexually molests their children. At least I hope it doesn't.
I guess what happened is I let all the negativity around me bear me down after a while and lost the edge of perseverence I've prided myself on. I dwelled on things too far, thought too far into it, read things that weren't there to be read and complicate any situation I was thrown into. I'd even go as far as admitting a bit of narrow-mindedness, in regards to people just from a little I know of them. Everyone is guilty of this, though. Would I judge someone just by them saying, "I'm a member of the Church of Satan?" Absolutely. Would I judge someone for being a Christian, Muslim, Buddhist, or.. whatever a practitioner of Hindu or Shinto is? Absolutely not. I have a thing against the Church of Satan, though. Any religion founded by a man who plagiarized his 'bible' from a book written in the 1890's, beat his dogs with 2x4's, and set up his daughter for rape is not going to get my respect.
So. With all this said, do I have any intentions for the New Year? Probably not. Making a New Year's resolution dooms it to failure each and every time.. perhaps because you try so hard at it? I dunno. I know what I want to do, but I'm not going to say, "I am going to make this happen." However, what I'd like to happen over the course of the next 12 months would be.. to somehow inspire my artistic imagination. I'm struggling to finish my old stiple, but I've made a lot of progress this month. I'd alsobe happy if my general mood and outlook on the world lightened up, but see, that's one of the things that you can't just "make happen".. but if I stumble upon the secret to it, I'll let you all know. And as vain as this one sounds, I'd like to acquire a weight of between 150-160 that is primarily muscle. *smirk* At least I aim low and realistically, and don't tempt fate by saying, "I'd love to have The Rock's physique without all the years of training!", because I'd have to start popping steroids.. and my dick'd shrivel up. *sniff*
This should be my last post before the New Year.. I won't be home much on Saturday. So. Drink up, be merry! It's a celebration, bitches <3