Cue the Angst
I can't stand this summer. I have been on a roller coaster ride of emotions that are unpleasant, nonsensical, and unstable. I have been happy but it never lasts, and then I spiral down into this depression that fades away a little bit, so I never write about it. I can't stand this anymore. Excepting atashinotenshi, I can't stand my friends and it's pathetic that
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I've faded away from the world of my high school and the people there. There's really nobody who would think about me there; nobody I'm in contact with besides an occasional IM. But I think there's something to say for that. Being there since I was 5, moving through it, and then simply stepping out when my time is done, slipping behind the curtain unseen and unheard, and letting everything else go on as it always did.
And I've slipped to something better, Chard, and so will you. Leaving a land where you're nobody, where all will forget you, and starting anew with friends and happiness and closeness... it's not a sad thing, Chard, it's POWERFUL. It allows you to embrace the new goodness wholeheartedly and let the high school years slip to the back of your mind as easily as you've slipped to the back of the mind of your highschool.
Whenever my girl scout troop is camping in the woods, we're always told, "Leave nothing behind." And that's what I've done with my past life, and that's what you WILL do, in a year. Leave nothing behind; no sign that you've been there; no trash, no baggage. Just soundlessly slip out, let yourself forget it, and go on to the next stage of your life.
You won't be sad, Chard. You'll be happy.
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