Now more than ever...

[phoenix_kaji]

...I need help.

For once, I don't even feel like giving everyone an earful of the details of what's happening right now. Probably because I'm actually quite ashamed of myself for once.

...Anyways, if anyone is feeling so bold (or bored?) as to give me advice, I'll listen the best I can. But really, I only want advice if you can back it up. I don't

Comments

[phoenix_kaji]

Nay, it's fine. I try to have a very rational approach to all this as well. And that's the kind of thing I'm looking for... I think we think a lot alike in that manner... sometimes...

And no, I don't feel judged. We're just different, and we acknowledge that, and we proceed along knowing that, and its fine.

I've tried some of this already...

I have better ...hope, maybe? with the new doc because he isn't just shooting in the dark with meds. There will always be a degree of dark-shooting with meds (I HATE that), but he's the first that looked at my medical history and made decisions based on that.

Honestly, the state I'd achieved earlier was the best I'd been in for years. But I knew it just wasn't enough. It wasn't enough to let me do the things I wanted to do with my life.

This new med, unfortunately, seems to not be working well. I still have to wait and see awhile longer, but right now... this isn't going to cut it.

I ...was without meds for a bit between the current one and the last ones I was on. It was scary coming off them only because of the awful withdrawal symptoms.

With them, I had reached a sort of stability. Not a sustainable stability, but one nonetheless. But I came off them anyways; I knwe it wasn't enough and I needed to change.

On no meds... I honestly felt dangerously unstable and I couldn't even find a logical explaination /why/. I felt out of control of myself.

Okay, now I'm babbling. Moving on...

If you have any leads on holistic approaches... I honestly wouldn't even know where to begin. It took me forever to even try psych meds; I'm cynical and cranky and I'd need guidance. I'm losing myself. I think. I certainly don't have the resources left to start something big like that alone.

Maybe what I need to do is shut the hell up and go to bed. :/

[ancatsidhe]

*points down* Listen to angel. she knows what she's talking about loads more than I do. I'd say more, but I have to get to work.