Quotes out of context - Serious analysis of my life for trivial reasons
Hi terrorists! The other day, I was having one of my weird conversations which somehow led to me reading Bjork's Wikipedia entry, and I came upon this quote from her.
"I think everyone’s bisexual to some degree or another; it’s just a question of whether or not you choose to recognise it and embrace it. Personally, I think choosing between men and women is like choosing between cake and ice cream. You’d be daft not to try both when there are so many different flavours.”
Since reading it yesterday, this quote has been stuck in my head pretty much all day. Mainly because I see the point she is trying to make, but I feel that cake and ice cream are a terrible example to make this particular point. Mainly because, let's face it, ice cream is WAY BETTER than cake and I will ALWAYS pick ice cream over cake without hesitation. I mean, cake is okay I guess. If I had absolutely no other options, I probably wouldn't order anything, but I might be inclined to try some sort of especially delicious cake. I suppose all of a sudden the quote made slightly more sense to me (albiet not in the way it was originally intended) because if all the women in the world were somehow wiped out, I probably would swing gayway after a while if I found some sort of exceptionally attractive and feminine guy.
Then I started to take the whole thing out of proportion and incorporating other desserts into it. What about brownies? Where do they factor into this whole thing? Brownies are way better than cake for the most part, and I will pretty much always take brownies over cake. While some people argue that brownies are a form of cake, the general consensus seems to be that it's somewhere between a cookie and cake. So within this analogy, maybe brownies would be transvestites? I'll always pick brownies over cake, I'll always pick ice cream over brownies, and I'd probably pick ice cream over brownies 95% of the time. I suppose I'd rather have sex with an extremely attractive transvestite than an extremely ugly hambeast of a woman, so I suppose brownies work in this regard. However, it would work better if brownies were halfway between ice cream and cake rather than cake and cookies, since "ice cream" is women in this analogy and "cake" is men. So what the hell are cookies? I'm not really sure, and while I'm at it, where does fruit pie fit into all of this? I consider pie to generally be far superior to cake, with some particularly delicious varieties of pie edging out some flavors of ice cream. I consider pie to be essentially on par with brownies (depending on the type of course, for instance, my girlfriend's brownies are way better than any pie, and most pies are way better than the brownies from the indie coffee shop by where I used to go to school), but they can't BOTH be transvestites, because pie and brownies are two entirely different things.
Finally, I would like to address the brutally complicated issue of cake being COMBINED with ice cream. Cake combined with ice cream is absolutely delicious and virtually always preferable to either cake or ice cream on their own. If we go back to the analogy, that would mean that theoretically, a threesome with another guy and a girl would be much better than sex with a girl alone. I would also probably prefer cake with ice cream over 2 scoops of ice cream and definitely over 2 slices of cake, so going back to the analogy, this means a guy-guy-girl threesome is unquestionably better than a 3 guy threesome (which I am inclined to agree with), and debatably better than a guy-girl-girl threesome (which I could not disagree with more). The situation is further confounded by the reintroduction of our old friends, pie and brownies. Pie a la mode or a brownie a la mode is pretty much always better than cake a la mode, so I suppose this means a guy-girl-something else threesome would be better than a guy-guy-girl threesome. I can only speculate on this obviously, but I'm not sure which way I would lean that one.
Granted, these examples don't account for every single possibility. For example, while pie with ice cream would nearly always be better than cake with ice cream, I'd rather have a slice of chocolate cake with vanilla ice cream than a slice of lemon pie with chocolate ice cream. While one could think of these examples as somehow working within the sexual preference paradigm, it doesn't actually work once you think about it. You could say that chocolate cake with vanilla ice cream represents a threesome with a super hot girl and an attractive, feminine man, while lemon pie with chocolate ice cream represents a threesome with an ugly girl and gross transvestite. However, when we look at the items individually, we can see this is clearly not the case. Lemon pie with chocolate ice cream doesn't work (at least as far as I'm concerned) because of the combination of the lemon pie and chocolate ice cream together, but seperately, they're both still pretty delicious. That same logic doesn't really apply to threesomes, as it would result in a theoretical situation where two individuals are attractive enough for you to want to have sex with seperately, but you would consider it totally gross to have sex with both of them at the same time. Now that I actually type that out, I suppose it theoretically could work that way, but I certainly couldn't think of any examples.
In conclusion, while I feel Bjork's heart is in the right place, I simply cannot agree with the logic of the comparison. I believe the most solid piece of evidence I have is that while cake with ice cream is typically preferable to 2 scoops of ice cream, a male male female threesome is certainly NOT preferable to a male-female-female threesome. Also she doesn't account for pies, brownies, cookies, or any other desserts that potentially fit into this working model.
Also in conclusion I must be gay
"I think everyone’s bisexual to some degree or another; it’s just a question of whether or not you choose to recognise it and embrace it. Personally, I think choosing between men and women is like choosing between cake and ice cream. You’d be daft not to try both when there are so many different flavours.”
Since reading it yesterday, this quote has been stuck in my head pretty much all day. Mainly because I see the point she is trying to make, but I feel that cake and ice cream are a terrible example to make this particular point. Mainly because, let's face it, ice cream is WAY BETTER than cake and I will ALWAYS pick ice cream over cake without hesitation. I mean, cake is okay I guess. If I had absolutely no other options, I probably wouldn't order anything, but I might be inclined to try some sort of especially delicious cake. I suppose all of a sudden the quote made slightly more sense to me (albiet not in the way it was originally intended) because if all the women in the world were somehow wiped out, I probably would swing gayway after a while if I found some sort of exceptionally attractive and feminine guy.
Then I started to take the whole thing out of proportion and incorporating other desserts into it. What about brownies? Where do they factor into this whole thing? Brownies are way better than cake for the most part, and I will pretty much always take brownies over cake. While some people argue that brownies are a form of cake, the general consensus seems to be that it's somewhere between a cookie and cake. So within this analogy, maybe brownies would be transvestites? I'll always pick brownies over cake, I'll always pick ice cream over brownies, and I'd probably pick ice cream over brownies 95% of the time. I suppose I'd rather have sex with an extremely attractive transvestite than an extremely ugly hambeast of a woman, so I suppose brownies work in this regard. However, it would work better if brownies were halfway between ice cream and cake rather than cake and cookies, since "ice cream" is women in this analogy and "cake" is men. So what the hell are cookies? I'm not really sure, and while I'm at it, where does fruit pie fit into all of this? I consider pie to generally be far superior to cake, with some particularly delicious varieties of pie edging out some flavors of ice cream. I consider pie to be essentially on par with brownies (depending on the type of course, for instance, my girlfriend's brownies are way better than any pie, and most pies are way better than the brownies from the indie coffee shop by where I used to go to school), but they can't BOTH be transvestites, because pie and brownies are two entirely different things.
Finally, I would like to address the brutally complicated issue of cake being COMBINED with ice cream. Cake combined with ice cream is absolutely delicious and virtually always preferable to either cake or ice cream on their own. If we go back to the analogy, that would mean that theoretically, a threesome with another guy and a girl would be much better than sex with a girl alone. I would also probably prefer cake with ice cream over 2 scoops of ice cream and definitely over 2 slices of cake, so going back to the analogy, this means a guy-guy-girl threesome is unquestionably better than a 3 guy threesome (which I am inclined to agree with), and debatably better than a guy-girl-girl threesome (which I could not disagree with more). The situation is further confounded by the reintroduction of our old friends, pie and brownies. Pie a la mode or a brownie a la mode is pretty much always better than cake a la mode, so I suppose this means a guy-girl-something else threesome would be better than a guy-guy-girl threesome. I can only speculate on this obviously, but I'm not sure which way I would lean that one.
Granted, these examples don't account for every single possibility. For example, while pie with ice cream would nearly always be better than cake with ice cream, I'd rather have a slice of chocolate cake with vanilla ice cream than a slice of lemon pie with chocolate ice cream. While one could think of these examples as somehow working within the sexual preference paradigm, it doesn't actually work once you think about it. You could say that chocolate cake with vanilla ice cream represents a threesome with a super hot girl and an attractive, feminine man, while lemon pie with chocolate ice cream represents a threesome with an ugly girl and gross transvestite. However, when we look at the items individually, we can see this is clearly not the case. Lemon pie with chocolate ice cream doesn't work (at least as far as I'm concerned) because of the combination of the lemon pie and chocolate ice cream together, but seperately, they're both still pretty delicious. That same logic doesn't really apply to threesomes, as it would result in a theoretical situation where two individuals are attractive enough for you to want to have sex with seperately, but you would consider it totally gross to have sex with both of them at the same time. Now that I actually type that out, I suppose it theoretically could work that way, but I certainly couldn't think of any examples.
In conclusion, while I feel Bjork's heart is in the right place, I simply cannot agree with the logic of the comparison. I believe the most solid piece of evidence I have is that while cake with ice cream is typically preferable to 2 scoops of ice cream, a male male female threesome is certainly NOT preferable to a male-female-female threesome. Also she doesn't account for pies, brownies, cookies, or any other desserts that potentially fit into this working model.
Also in conclusion I must be gay