(Untitled)

[philippa_]

I had a little time on my hands and decided to use it to do some writing.

Title: Not enough
Rating: PG-13
Beta: none
Summary: Post "The Truth." Ryan isn't dealing with the fact that nobody trusted him over the Oliver drama quite as well as Sandy was hoping.

Comments

[beachtree]

Thanks for this. You've tapped into a number of my pet peeves and major disappointments all in one shot. The Schwartz Express really did steamroll right over the most glaring emotional moments and significant opportunities when it "seemed" impossible to overlook and outright ignore what was going on.

This desperately hurt and confused Ryan seems so plausible when I think back to what he allowed himself to admit to Theresa after the Oliver Twisted debacle. Ryan, who has the most pathetic expectations when it comes to receiving anything from anyone, was upset and wounded enough to confess those feelings to Theresa. If he, of all people, was able to recognize just how much trust had been broken- and a link that had been so fragile and precarious at best, then there was a problem of epic proportions. There was that longing that someone would explain things to him and somehow reassure him, and that someone would have been Sandy since he was so wary of Kirsten. Instead, he was left more alienated and more alone than ever after letting himself believe and hope. He lived what we witnessed, with the Cohen modus operandi in action: get back to "normal," which meant what was most "normal" and easy for them.

This always struck me as such a turning point. Ryan dismissed Seth's anti-climatic, hollow, mandatory apology because he was resigned to the fact that he had no choice, that Seth wasn't able or willing to be the person or friend he had thought he could be. Why waste the time or words when all Seth wanted was to get back to "normal" as well with his Summer-centric/Seth-centric diatribe? And if he couldn't expect anything else from Seth, he certainly was in no position- and not worthy- to ask anything of the Cohens. He really seemed to be so separate after that as he withdrew and was even more meticulous in censoring his words and behavior. The thin ice beneath him had already cracked and broken away and it was worse than starting over. To me, this was the real impetus that made Ryan have to leave when Theresa manipulated him. The lack of follow up made him vulnerable enough and guilty enough and uncertain enough to have to leave, not just feel obligated to go.

How I wish Ryan would have truly verbalized what had to be overwhelming annoyance at enduring Seth's constant, neverending monologue. He certainly would have felt obligated to listen even if he tuned him out, if only because he was so indebted. I guess one could argue that it might have been better than being ignored- as he had spent a lifetime, or, his other previous option, being berated and insulted. Still, no one should be subjected to that, or led to believe he had no choice or right to express himself.

For all of his colossal, potentially fatal mistakes, at least Sandy recognizes, if almost too late, that it was he and his wife and family- the ones entrusted with protecting and caring for Ryan, who actually were the ones who pushed him to inflict punishment on himself. This wasn't a kid acting out and testing limits in defiance, this was someone who felt so hurt and lost that he believed he had no one to turn to. This pain was from the Cohens and a number of failures with seeds that had been planted right at the beginning. How I wish we'd seen some realization like this and some responsible attempts to bridge gaps and indicate interest, support and investment- even, shudder, to admit shortcomings.

The image of such a vulnerable Ryan giving voice to his insecurities and some of the emotions he keeps so tightly bottled up would have been such an eye-opener for Sandy, albeit a painful one. How many times Ryan must have wondered what you've alluded, but never dared let the cracks show...

[philippa_]

For me the oliver debacle was one of my favourite times in season 1. We could finally see a more fragile and angsty side of Ryan. I couldn't believe that noone believed him over some guy that they didn't even know. Then straight after his apology, Seth immediately goes back to talking about his own issues. He tells Ryan that he wouldn't fail him again but then he shushes Ryan when he's trying to talk and suddenly reverts back to Summer.

I loved how he opened up to Theresa. He trusted her and she was actually there for him when the Cohens weren't with an open ear.

I think if I lived with a Seth, I would end up either gagging him or killing him in his sleep. It always surprises me when teenage girls are all over Adam Brody saying he's gorgeous and hilarious as Seth. I mean I don't know Adam Brody, but Seth is just so self abdorbed and so... talkative. I can always imagine him as one of those grandpas who are just completely unfunny and all the little grandchidren have to fake laugh at his jokes upon order by their parents.

I wish there had been a scene in the show, where Sandy would have come to Ryan and told him he was sorry that they hadn't trusted him. I mean it really isn't that hard to put in.

Anyway, I will stop rambling about my hate for Seth and forgotten little scenes.

Thanks for commenting. I do love your reviews.