N e g a t i v i t y .
So I gave my last post a good deal of thought, and I'm not going to delete it because I feel like there was some flash of brilliance there, but all in all I was lead on and I made an ass of myself and there's nothing good or positive about it.
On that note, I am never going to be happy until I learn not to hold myself to such strict standards. Conversely, I have no idea how to do that. I guess what I'm trying to say is that I'm about to self-destruct and I need a vacation from life.
I'm penniless and starving, and I feel like all of that would be bearable (maybe even a positive learning experience) if I was in a better place in better company. I'm not understood or appreciated out here, and it makes it so hard for me to feel good about anything.
All I want is to sit on a sun drenched patio with a cigarette and my copy of Candide.
On that note, I am never going to be happy until I learn not to hold myself to such strict standards. Conversely, I have no idea how to do that. I guess what I'm trying to say is that I'm about to self-destruct and I need a vacation from life.
I'm penniless and starving, and I feel like all of that would be bearable (maybe even a positive learning experience) if I was in a better place in better company. I'm not understood or appreciated out here, and it makes it so hard for me to feel good about anything.
All I want is to sit on a sun drenched patio with a cigarette and my copy of Candide.