My Stardust Melody, Chapter 26
Chapter WARNING: MAJOR ANGST! This is a tough chapter by any measure. The fallout from this chapter continues over the next several, which is why I'm posting three today and two next week to get us through this segment quickly. So, proceed with caution if you're angst-sensitive. If you'd just rather skip or it gets too much for you, I'll write a summary of the three chapters I post today at the beginning of Chapter 29 when things return to a tolerable level of heartache and the plot twists yet again. Please, please keep in mind that I promise a happy ending with a dollop of whipped cream on top. I'll spend lots of chapters fixing what happens here-- funny chapters, romantic chapters, bonding chapters, etc. Can you tell I'm nervous?
A/N It may be helpful to read this Plot Summary for Chapters 1 - 25. Not a necessity by any means, but I know it's been a year since I started writing this and some things may be fuzzy.
Chapter 26
Luke gazed at the fire while Reid waited for him to explain. The doctor felt unaccountably nervous, as if he thought Luke was going to drop a new bomb. Was this the point where Reid would learn that everything bad he ever thought about Luke was true?
As Reid's hands slid away from Luke's waist, the blond finally spoke. "I'm sorry, Reid. I shouldn't have done that. I didn't mean to lead you on, but I guess that's what I was doing."
Not understanding, Reid surmised, "Because you're taken?" I just knew Henry was gay.
"No! God, no!" Luke cried, his startled eyes meeting Reid's. "It's nothing like that, I promise. But, actually, what you just said is the problem."
"I don't understand," Reid replied.
"Trust, Reid. You don't trust me, and I don't trust you. Not with everything, anyway. I feel like I'm waiting for you to decide you don't like me again and say something awful."
Quirking his lips into a half-smile, Reid said, "I can't say anything rude if my lips are otherwise occupied."
Luke smiled briefly in response. "Cute, and God knows I'm very tempted, but I'm talking about the stuff that goes a bit past rude, and you know it. I don't want another apology, really, but I don't think I can be physical with a guy unless I know that he really wants me."
"I think you're sitting on the proof of my want." In fact, that proof was getting awfully painful.
"Ugh, I'm not explaining this well. Let me try again. I can't sleep with a guy unless I know he respects me."
"And how would someone go about proving that?" Reid asked.
Luke shrugged. "I don't know. Maybe a little effort from the guy to let me know he's really interested."
"Like in a 1950's-love-song kind of way?"
"No," Luke replied, then winced. "Actually, yes."
"You want to be wooed," Reid interpreted.
"I wouldn't use that word. It sounds like some sort of Victorian heroine."
"Okay, but there's a flaw in your logic. We've already slept together. Isn't it a little late for a display of maidenly virtue?"
Luke lightly placed his hand on Reid's forearm. "I think we'd both agree that neither of us are the same people we were two years ago. I know I slept with you then, but I can't see myself doing something like that again. I need more than one great night. I need to feel…cherished."
Feeling squeamish, Reid said, "Yeah, that's really not me." He could have sworn he saw a flicker of disappointment in Luke's eyes, and to his everlasting mystification, something around the doctor's heart squeezed. Surely, it was indigestion.
Luke's smile was slightly wan as he replied, "I didn't think it was, and that's why we shouldn't kiss anymore."
Reid could respect the honesty of that statement. If that's how Luke felt then he wasn't going to argue. Given that the "indigestion" around his heart still seemed to be bothering him, he tried to lighten the atmosphere. "So, tell me more about what courting Luke Snyder is like. What is this foreign concept you speak of? Candles and dinner at the most expensive restaurant in town or maybe something more elaborate? A trip to Paris or rowing down the canals of Venice?"
Luke rolled his eyes and said, "Simple is good."
"Serenades? I don't think you're going to get a lot of guys willing to sing to you while you hang your head out of some window."
"I don't need a serenade," Luke said huffily.
Reid snorted. "In this weather? I hope not. I'd feel sorry for the guy."
Luke elbowed him in the stomach, eliciting a grunt from Reid.
"Does the poor sap have to write poetry?" Reid continued.
"Not unless he really wants to," Luke replied.
Reid recited, "There once was a man from Nantucket, Whose dick was so long--"
"Stop right there," Luke interrupted and laughed. "I do not want to know how that ends, and I can't believe you know a limerick."
"It's the dark side of having a photographic memory--I sometimes can't dislodge the stuff from my mind I'd like to forget."
"Well, please don't get that thing lodged in my brain. Limericks are kind of like annoying songs--once you hear them, you can't get them out of your head for days."
"Yeah, I once spent two months with the chorus to Britney Spears's Oops…I Did It Again playing through my head every time I stepped into the operating room."
Luke groaned. "Geez, did you have to bring that song up? Now I'm going to be singing it for the next week."
"Speaking of music, where did you learn to play?"
"Speaking of music? Really, Britney Spears qualifies?"
Reid shrugged. "Whatever. I figured you'd like to talk about something else."
"You're right. I had private lessons at my mother's insistence. I hated it for years but eventually grew to love playing. My grandmother had a huge grand piano in her home and I'd play for hours when she was in town."
"Your family must have been proud of your talent."
"Is that a compliment?" Luke asked mockingly.
"Notice that I'm not complimenting your graciousness," Reid remarked.
"Well, I don't think anyone would ever compliment yours."
Reid laughed. "Probably not. I think I'd hate to meet the person who called me gracious. They'd either be an idiot or the biggest arrogant jackass to ever live."
"A title to which you aspire, no doubt," Luke grumbled.
"How'd you know?" Reid asked with a grin.
Luke snickered. "Anyway, didn't I hear you or Nathan say that you played?"
Reid nodded. "A little. My uncle read something about music and mathematical intelligence correlating and had me take some lessons for a couple of years. I was just glad to be out of the house and away from him."
Luke frowned in sympathy. "Did you enjoy it at all?"
"Playing? Not really. I tend not to enjoy things that I'm not really good at. I know enough about music to know I could never play like you."
Bracingly, Luke responded, "Maybe if you just practiced more. I had to practice a lot."
"Luke, you're crazy if you think most people just need practice to play like you. Plus, I'm perfectly happy the way I am. I don't feel some void in my life because I never mastered Bach's Well-Tempered Clavier."
"Well, you really haven't lived until you've mastered The Well-Tempered Clavier," Luke joked.
"Somehow, I will just have to carry on without it," Reid replied with feigned despair.
They both laughed. Reid looked into Luke's brown eyes and said, "You mention your grandmother a lot, and I take it she's not around anymore. How did she die?"
Luke's face fell, and Reid regretted the question. His curiosity had gotten the better of him and the question had sprung forth before he could think of the effect it would have. This was precisely why he shouldn't be allowed to talk to people, he thought ruefully.
"I'm sorry; I shouldn't have asked," Reid said.
Luke shook his head. "No, I don't mind. I just miss her--I miss all of my family, really. Lucinda died from breast cancer shortly before I went to college."
"It must have been tough to lose someone so close to you just before you were about to leave home," Reid concluded. He thought about his own mother's battle with cancer and how difficult it had been for him. If Luke was as close to his grandmother as he had indicated thus far, Reid could understand just how hard watching Lucinda fight--and lose--would have been.
"It was. Grandmother was such a force to be reckoned with, and it was just so noticeable when she wasn't around. You always knew when she was present--no one could ignore Lucinda Walsh--and when she wasn't here anymore, it was painfully obvious."
"How long was she sick?" Reid asked, thinking about the time he'd spent with his mother when she was in the hospital. It was remarkable that he and Luke shared this experience. Since Reid didn't go out of his way to make friends, he had rarely discussed cancer with anyone outside of his role as a neurosurgeon.
"She was diagnosed less than a year before she died. Chemo didn't work, and she declined pretty rapidly once the treatments stopped. Grandmother never complained though. She still swore she'd kick cancer in the ass right up until the end."
"Were you with her?"
"As much as I could be while still being in high school. Grandmother would have knocked me senseless if I let my grades slide. But I was there when she died. It was a Saturday in October and the rain hadn't stopped for three days. It's funny that I can remember what the weather was like outside her window."
"Things like that sometimes stick with you. I remember that my mother's room smelled oddly like roses when she died. I think one of the doctors must have worn a lot of perfume."
Luke flicked a quick smile at the little quip. "How did your parents die?"
"Cancer got Mom and then Dad died in a car wreck a couple weeks later."
"Wow, so close together? You must have been devastated."
"Well, I wasn't exactly jumping for joy." Of course, he hadn't exactly felt what most other people felt when their parents died either. He had been devastated in a way, but when his mom died, he could admit he felt a tiny amount of relief. Her suffering was over, and that was a relief, but he also knew her life wasn't going to drag him down anymore. He knew his father so little that Reid felt more scared about his future--where would he go--than anything else.
"I'm not sure I've met anyone else who lost a parent in a car crash. That's quite a coincidence."
"Not really," Reid shrugged. "Motor vehicle accidents generally account for over 40,000 deaths per year. So really, we both have this in common with lots of people across the country." Not that Reid had encountered many of those people either. A pang of desire to be with someone who understood exactly how he felt shot through Reid. A sigh almost escaped his lips as he pondered the ridiculous kinds of emotions Luke bought out in him.
"Oh," Luke replied, looking a little disappointed. However, he was still determined to find out more about Reid. Lifting his chin back up, he asked, "What kind of cancer did your mom have?"
"Breast."
"Oh, like my grandmother. How old was she?"
"Thirty-two." He shifted uncomfortably, not liking the direction of this conversation.
"She was so young," Luke said sadly. "My parents were in their forties when they died in the car crash. I guess that still pretty young."
Reid nodded, not saying anything.
"I remember my grandmother's skin got so cold in her last days. And her breathing got so heavy that it scared the hell out of me. Was it like that with your mom?"
"Those are typical physical changes as the body begins to slow down its functions," Reid said in a clinical voice.
"But was it like that for your mom?"
Reid let out a long breath. "Look, why do you want to know? It's history."
Luke's eyes dimmed in disappointment. "I--I don't know. I guess it's something we share in common, and I don't get to talk about it with a lot of people. Most people don't seem to get what losing a loved one to cancer is really like. They're sympathetic, but it's not like talking to someone who has been through the same thing."
"Yeah, I really don't get the whole 'sharing' thing. It happened, it sucked, and I prefer not to dwell on it."
"Okay… I can respect that," Luke said with a sad smile that made Reid feel guilty for being so curt.
Reid guessed it would be okay to ask Luke a little more about his family so long as they could stay off the subject of Reid. "Your mom died in a car wreck?"
"Yeah. I was nineteen. Even though I knew my mom had done some stupid things--and Dad, too, I suppose--I still miss her. It's weird to be angry at someone and miss them so much."
Reid assumed Luke was talking about his parents' adultery. Reid sighed, concealing a wave of familiar disgust at the thought of his mother's transgressions. "How did you find out about your mom and dad?"
"My cousin Jack called me while I was at college. It's one of those moments in my life where I define everything in my life 'pre-phone-call' and 'post-phone-call,' like everything changed in an instant."
Nodding his head, Reid acknowledged, "I've had moments like that, too. I can classify my life into 'before I moved out of Angus's home' and 'after.'"
Reid wondered if the death of Luke's parents was the way Damian had wormed his way into Luke's life.
"And to know you 'before' would be very different than knowing you 'after,'" Luke surmised.
"Precisely. The day I moved out is the day I seized hold of my own life." He could still feel the weight of his suitcase in his hand as he literally walked out of Angus's life without looking back. It had been his eighteenth birthday, and Reid packed his bag in the morning and left. He moved into his college dorm early, taking some summer classes, and not once did he return to the house he'd never felt was home. After eighteen years of being subjected to other people's whims and bad judgment, Reid took control of his own fate. It had been the best decision of his life and the most terrifying.
Luke cocked his head to the side as he looked at Reid. "Funny, I can't picture you not being in control of your own destiny. You seem so self-assured that it's easy to forget you might have insecurities."
"Insecurities? I didn't say anything about that," Reid deflected lightly.
Luke looked at him searchingly, and Reid had a terrible suspicion that the blond could see right through him. Reid grimaced and shrugged off the exposed feeling. He was being ridiculous if he thought Luke could somehow mystically read his thoughts.
"We all have insecurities," Luke finally said.
"And what would a golden boy like you be insecure about?"
Luke's eyes betrayed annoyance at being called a "golden boy." Reid regretted saying it--he knew now that Luke's life wasn't filled with 24-hour days of swimming in gemstones and being fanned by scantily-clad servants feeding him grapes. The blond had seen more than his share of hardship. For Christ's sake, Luke had been kidnapped! He wondered if he should apologize or if that might make things worse.
"It's okay, Reid, I know you didn't mean it," Luke said.
"What?" Reid asked. "I didn't mean what now?" Was he really that transparent?
"The look on your face gives it away." Luke didn't even bother pretending to explain what Reid regretted.
"I don't know what you're talking about," Reid muttered.
"Anyway, of course I have insecurities. Who doesn't?"
"Like that your hair isn't precisely the perfect length?"
Luke snorted. "No, they're a bit more serious than that. Although, of course I do have some insecurities about my looks."
"You do?" Reid snorted. Luke was gorgeous. What was there that he could possibly be concerned about?
"Why, Reid, I do believe you're complimenting me again," Luke said with an exaggerated smile.
"Don't bat your long lady-lashes at me," Reid said irritably. "Seriously, do you have some freckles I don't know about? A mole on your stomach that you just can't live with?"
Luke looked down at his lap for a moment before returning his gaze to Reid's. "Scars. I've got a lot of scars that represent a lot of crazy things."
"Like your transplant scar?"
"Yes," Luke said. "Every time I see it, it's an ugly reminder of how dumb I can be."
"Luke, your scars aren't ugly. Having them just means you're strong, that you survived." He reached out and caressed the scar on Luke's wrist. Did the blond see that scar as ugly, too?
Relief shone in Luke's eyes. Reid realized the younger man had worried that Reid had judged him harshly for the events in the younger man's past. He supposed he couldn't blame Luke for that--Reid hadn't given him any reason to believe any better. Reid swallowed the urge to argue and decided that he would just have to show Luke a worthier side.
On that note, Reid said, "How about I make us dinner and then we get some sleep?" Surely, wrangling food would earn him some more points.
It struck Reid, suddenly, that in almost any other situation he would have panicked over the dearth of food and inability to leave a place. He always felt a little edgy over a lack of food since he was a child and had been left alone by his mother, and he realized that Luke had done such a good job distracting him that he really hadn't thought much about it since they had come to the cabin. Gratitude and no little amount of admiration for the blond washed over him.
Luke smiled, "That sounds good. How or where do you want to sleep?"
Bringing his thoughts back to the present, Reid replied, "I thought I could light a fire in the bedroom now to get it warm, and after dinner we could pile every blanket we have on the bed and try to sleep in there. If that doesn't work, we can come back here and sleep on the rug."
"Thank you, Reid," Luke said.
"For what? I've got to keep warm, too," Reid said, knowing that Luke could see through his pretense.
Luke surprised him by shaking his head and saying, "No, thank you for earlier. For making me feel a bit better."
"Oh," Reid replied. "You're welcome," he said with hesitation. He wasn't sure if that was the right thing to say.
Apparently it was, because Luke's smile returned and warmed Reid. The doctor hated thinking about the damage Luke's smile did to his equilibrium.
After dinner, the pair climbed in bed together. A glance at Luke's phone on the bedside table told them it was barely after nine o'clock, but they were both exhausted. There was no discussion this time of cuddling. The temperature in the room made it clear that they were going to have to share body heat.
"This is awkward," Luke remarked as he and Reid moved toward each other on the center of the bed.
Reid agreed wholeheartedly but said, "Look, this is no different than what we've been doing all afternoon. It's just a bed." And I like you a great deal more than I did a day ago. And I feel comfortable with you which is completely uncomfortable. And every single time I put my hands on you, I want to touch you everywhere. But, hey, what's awkward about all that?
"I guess," Luke said uneasily as he propped a pillow underneath his bad ankle and then lied down on this back.
"I'm not usually the guy who does the cuddling," Reid said in disgust as he gingerly wrapped himself around Luke.
"I beg to differ," Luke said with a laugh, referring to the way they woke up that morning.
Reid was glad it was relatively dark in the room because he was sure he blushed. Jesus, was it just this morning that he'd draped himself around Luke like a blanket?
"Bring that up again," Reid warned, "and you'll be all alone on this bed with no covers."
Snickering, Luke said, "Bring what up?"
"That's more like it."
"Well, good night, Reid. I have to admit that I had a good day. I wasn't expecting that."
Reid smiled into Luke's neck. "Me, too, Luke. It was a good day all things considered." It really had been a good day, heck, even a fun day. It was startling how right things felt when he was with Luke and they weren't arguing. He had to admit that Nathan could be correct about Luke being the right guy for him. Reid wouldn't have thought that possible, but Luke was quickly erasing a lot of the doubts the doctor had about him. If Luke was truly what he seemed, a beautiful man who somehow inherently understood Reid, then Reid had to admit the idea of a relationship was not as entirely unappealing as he'd led Luke to believe. Reid had not entirely ruled out the idea of a relationship, but he never really thought anyone would come along and accept Reid, warts and all.
Tonight, however, he'd let Luke further into his life than he thought possible. Reid never talked about his parents or Angus, and he had willingly given Luke information about them. Hell, he'd told Luke about his feelings, and that was something Reid was sure would never happen. There was something about Luke's easy acceptance that made it simple to confide in him. While Reid wasn't doling out anything most people would find earth-shattering news, for Reid, to discuss anything personal was of major significance. He thought Luke might even understand how monumental it was.
Falling asleep to the rhythmic beating of Luke's heart against his chest, Reid thought if he had to label it, it might be optimism he felt as he drifted off. He would never have thought he might feel that way about Luke again, but it was undeniably there.
Reid woke early the next morning, just as the sun was starting to rise. He was unusually exuberant about the day, looking forward to spending some more time with Luke. It was a weird feeling, but Reid for once decided to just accept it and be happy. He pushed himself up onto his forearms and looked down at Luke who still had his eyes closed. A twitch of a smile around Luke's mouth told Reid that the blond wasn't asleep.
"How long do you plan to stare at me?" Luke asked.
"How long do you plan to keep your eyes shut?" Reid asked buoyantly in reply.
"Until you move off me so I can go brush my teeth."
Reid snickered. "You're worrying about morning breath when I haven't gotten to brush in over a day?"
Luke nodded firmly. "Yep. And if you're nice, you can borrow my toothbrush."
"Yuck. No offense. I don't share people's germ-sticks. But I'll take the toothpaste if you don't mind."
"Fine, but you need to let me up," Luke said, wriggling underneath Reid.
"What if I don't?" Reid said with a leer. He wasn't sure what had come over him; it was like a crazed playful person had taken over the controls in his head for the moment.
"Ready to sing me some serenades?" Luke asked, opening one eye to peer at Reid.
"My singing is no better than my poetry," Reid responded drily.
"Then I suggest you roll off me," Luke said.
"Your loss," Reid said and hopped off the blond.
"Maybe," Luke allowed while he carefully rolled to the side of the bed and sat up. He then walked gingerly over to the bathroom and shut the door behind him.
Reid smiled as he tidied up the room. Nathan would hopefully come today, and the doctor didn't want to leave a huge mess behind. He picked up his wallet and keys, and then set about returning pillows and blankets to their original locations. A messy bedroom would lead to a lot of questions from his friend. Nathan was annoying enough without giving him any ammunition.
As he was wadding a blanket up into a ball, Reid was surprised by the sound of a beep coming from Luke's phone lying on the bedside table. Without thinking, Reid walked over to it and picked it up. He flipped it open and found that Luke had a text message. A text! Maybe if Luke had a signal, they could get out of there more quickly.
Wondering if it were Nathan texting that he was on the way, Reid began reading. He then saw that it was from Henry, but he couldn't stop himself from continuing once he saw the content.
--Hey, boyfriend. I paid your bill. I know you'll pay me back. ;) Nathan says you're stuck in our cabin with Reid. Guess I don't have to worry about you using up our stash of condoms, lol. Maddie to the rescue soon. Hope you get this message.
Boyfriend. Our cabin. Condoms. The words jumped out from the screen at Reid and his blood turned to ice. He was obviously standing in Henry's and Luke's master bedroom of their little love nest in the woods. Feeling betrayed again by the blond who obviously had no morals or heart, Reid stared at the screen for a long moment.
He dropped the phone back on the table as if it burned his hand. He sat down on the bed, then jumped back up, disgusted to sit in the same place where he had stupidly been wrapped around Luke. Like a caged animal, he paced around the room, a battle going on within his mind as he tried to come to terms with the truth.
What the fuck was Luke's game? Did he just want to see if he could have Reid slavering over him again? After everything, after finding out that he'd cost Reid his job, why would Luke want to do this? Hell, Reid thought ruefully, Luke was probably lying about everything. He probably faked tears and pretended not to know Reid had been fired.
Reid racked his brain for other lies that Luke had told. Who knew what was true? Reid raised a hand to his mouth as he realized he fallen for Luke's lie about not hiring that guy to attack Reid in the garden. He gagged and thought he was going to be sick.
I'm still the same idiot I've always been. How the hell could I have let myself believe him again? After what happened last time? I must deserve this for being so stupid. I can't believe I trusted him.
It was all a twisted game, Reid's worst nightmare come true. Luke was still the spoiled and cruel man he'd met three years ago. He felt like a knife was twisting in his gut as he remembered he'd been foolish enough to confide things in Luke. God knows what Luke planned to do with the information. Reid never said things about his parents or Angus. Never! Now Luke knew things that only Nathan and maybe Angus ever suspected.
He inhaled sharply as he thought about what Luke had said about not having sex with someone without mutual respect. What bullshit. Luke obviously slept with Henry Coleman just to get his bills paid. He'd bet his last dime that if he had a bigger bank account than Henry, Luke would have gladly jumped in the sack with him. Luke Snyder had already sold his damned soul, so why wouldn't he sell his body as well?
Reid was shaking from the rage and despair that coursed through his veins. He wanted to get out of there, but where could he go? The click of the doorknob turning grabbed his attention. Luke was coming out. He swallowed the lump of anguish in his throat and turned toward the blond. As he looked at the cold man with the false smile, all he felt was emptiness and grief.
***
Luke looked in the mirror as he brushed his teeth and contemplated what to do with the man in the next room. Today was likely the day they would return to Oakdale, and Luke wasn't sure what would happen then. He'd celebrate Christmas with his siblings and have his cousins over for dinner, of course, but that's not what he meant.
What would Reid be in his life? It was hard to imagine him just as a friend, although Luke supposed it was a possibility. Whether a friend or something more, he still had the problem of trusting Reid around Faith, Natalie, and Ethan. He knew he couldn't continue to hide their existence from Reid indefinitely, and in fact, Luke realized it was probably as good of a time as any to tell Reid. It wasn't like Reid would never find out in Oakdale. Everyone knew the Snyders in the small town.
Once Reid found out that Luke was in charge of three younger kids, Luke wondered what Reid would do. Reid didn't seem the sort who would relish spending time with kids--and he didn't have to--but would he run far at the mention of Luke's siblings? The more Luke thought about it, the more he realized he should probably address this head on and see how Reid reacted. He could almost hear Lucinda giving him that exact advice.
If Reid didn't run screaming into the forest at the mention of the kids, Luke pondered what the next step would be. Could he get a promise from Reid that under no circumstances would he ever be cruel in their presence? Could Reid even keep such a promise? Luke's instincts told him that Reid could, but he was still a little hesitant to base such a decision on his gut. He guessed the only way he'd know what was right was to discuss it with Reid. No matter what his future with Reid might bring, whether it was friendship or something more, Luke needed to talk to Reid.
Feeling suddenly hopeful, Luke quickly rinsed his mouth with water and then wiped his face with a towel. He couldn't wait to see Reid again and discuss things with him. He looked in the medicine cabinet to see if there was an unused toothbrush that Reid could have. Unfortunately, there was just the gigantic stash of condoms that Luke didn't want to think about. He laughed to himself remembering the passages from Taming the Cougar they had read yesterday. Katie must have been really miffed at Henry and Barbara for her to write an entire book about them. Teasing Henry about it was going to be a lot of fun.
Still smiling to himself, he opened the bathroom door and walked into the bedroom. Reid was in his clothes from the night before and looked impossibly handsome with his stubble having grown in for two days and his hair ruffled. Luke's smile widened at the sight, and the blond felt unaccountably optimistic that everything would be okay.
As Luke stepped closer, Reid reached into his back pocket and pulled out his brown leather wallet. There was something awry in the motion--the doctor's hands didn't move with their usual fluidity. Luke stood transfixed, not sure what to make of the gesture.
"How much?" Reid asked without looking at him.
"What?" Luke replied in confusion. He could have sworn Reid sounded hostile.
Reid turned and Luke was taken aback by the cold expression in his blue eyes. "Obviously, I haven't offered a high enough number," the doctor said in a biting tone. "What's the going rate to fuck Luke Snyder?" Reid started pulling bills from his wallet. "Fifty? One hundred? Or will that only get me a blowjob? Two hundred?" Money cascaded onto the bed like rain.
Luke flinched from the hatred in Reid's voice. "What are you talking about?" he breathed. His mind raced for some explanation of what Reid was saying. Surely, Reid couldn't mean what it sounded like.
"I'm tired of this little dance between us. It's time to be honest. Three hundred? Will that get you horny?" Reid face was like cold stone, but his voice radiated heated contempt.
Luke was too stunned to say anything and was barely holding back a flood of tears. He could not understand, truly could not fathom, what had happened to the compassionate, teasing man that had been with him last night. Just minutes ago the man Luke so admired had been present in this very room. Hadn't Luke just been thinking about a future with him? Why was Reid saying this?
Reid continued his disgusting accusations when Luke was silent. "I apologize. Is offering money directly too vulgar for your refined sensibilities? I've never done this before. Should I propose to pay for something? Your phone bill or maybe a nice watch? Is that how Henry does it? Will that be enough 'respect' for you?"
"Henry?" Luke asked, completely confused and hurt. "I told you he's straight," he said in a small voice.
Reid snorted and folded his arms. "You can quit with the pretenses. I know about your little arrangement. You should have just told me you wanted something shiny, but maybe you underestimate how much money I make. I'm a world-class neurosurgeon. It's a lot. Even your Henry would be impressed. Or were you worried about losing Henry? No doubt a guy who constantly pays for sex has a wandering eye. But don't worry. Memorial really wants me to stay. I'm sure my biggest benefactor wouldn't mind whoring you out to keep me around. Wait," Reid said snapping his fingers. "That was my mistake. I didn't realize I needed to talk to your pimp."
Luke found his voice in a fury. "I don't know what the hell you're talking about. You can say whatever you want about me, but you can't talk that way about Henry."
"Getting defensive over your walking bankroll, Mr. Snyder?"
"I love Henry; he's done more for me than I can ever repay."
Reid cocked his head to the side. "I hadn't considered that you'd use love as a defense. How stupid do you think I am? We both know what you are and what he is to you, so you can save yourself the trouble of professing anything like love. Although in case you genuinely believe that, I think you should know you're confusing love for greed."
"You don't know anything, Reid. I don't see one reason why I need to defend myself to someone like you. Henry is so far above you, and you're too blind to see it." Luke said, balling his fists at his side.
"Too blind to see what? That you've got that idiotic ape and this whole town completely snowed?" Reid asked nastily.
Luke was incredulous. "I can't believe after all this time this is what you think of me. Do you know what regret is, Reid? Because one day you're going to feel it, and I hope I'm there to watch."
Reid laughed at that, a short, strangled laugh that sent chills down Luke's spine. They stared at each other in angry silence. Reid's contemptuous gaze raked Luke. He finally spoke in a low voice, "Congratulations, Luke. You will surely win the award for Best Actor this year with that kind of dramatic flair. I could almost believe you're innocent. In fact, all your little lies have been quite convincing. It must be what's so alluring about you in bed."
Bile rose in the back of Luke's throat. To think he had ever confided anything in this man! Humiliation for trusting Reid with the story of his kidnapping, his kidney, and his grandmothers washed over him in overwhelming waves. He couldn't win with Reid. Obviously, he would never win with Reid. It would always come back to Reid accusing him of greed or lying.
Luke angrily ran a damp hand through his hair. He swallowed audibly and blinked his eyes that ached with unshed tears. "Don't speak to me again," he said in a low voice. "Ever." It was the shortest and most honest sentiment he could trust himself to say without betraying his anguish. He would not cry here.
His determination, however, faltered when he heard Maddie's voice. From the doorway, Maddie demanded, "What the hell is going on here?"
Relief and gratitude for his friend's presence caused the tears that Luke had fought against to spill over. He turned to see Maddie stride into the room while glaring at Reid. She put her arm around him and asked quietly, "What did he do?"
Luke shook his head with a tiny jerk and couldn't do anything but bury his face in her shoulder.
"It's okay," Maddie said soothingly. She urged him toward the door. Luke picked up his bag and caught a swift glance of Reid scowling at him with his arms folded over his chest. The younger man still couldn't understand the change in Reid. It didn't make sense.
As they passed Nathan in the doorway, Maddie looked over her shoulder and said to the doctor in a low, intimidating voice, "I don't know what you did, but you stay the hell away from him or you'll answer to me."
Luke and Maddie quickly walked to the front door. As they stepped out into the cold snow, Luke could hear Nathan's voice boom, "What the hell, Reid?"
The blond honestly didn't care what Reid's answer was. At this moment, all he felt was emptiness when it came to Reid Oliver.