a stage of joyful remorse...
I made it... the countdown has finally come to an end. Save my finals next week I will never set foot inside my high school for the purpose of education ever again. I feel so incredibly relieved, the burden of getting through this is finally over. As I sat in my last class counting down the remaining minutes my mind finally began to drift towards what I will miss about this place. Save a few people, I will not have a problem never seeing my classmates anymore. However, I did find myself saddened by the fact that I'm leaving some teachers behind. I never realized just how large an impact they have had on my life and how they have helped shape me into the individual I am. I came to a realization today, that being that high school is not a preperation for your future career, that's what college is for. High school molds you into the person that you will become for the rest of your life. This applies to every facet of the personality and the way one interacts with others. High school is a series of trial and error to see how one can become happy and content with themselves. Those who are either overly nostalgic or suicidal as a result of high school are so because they were never able to find themselves. We have all dealt with the drama, we have all gone through the difficult task of trying to blend in with our peers. As I prepare for college now I have come to realize that I have discovered the person I will be for the rest of my life, save a few maturing features we all undergo as life progresses. The goal is to find a way to succeed, one cannot succeed unless he is confident in himself and accepting of the person he or she has become. High school shapes this person and once it's over, people can prepare themselves to accel in a particular field. True college is about meeting new people and creating new memories but not learning how to do so. This is a new playing field, people will either accept you for the way you are or you move on to the next person. In high school you are forced to deal with just about the same people on a constant basis year after year. For the first time, I am confronted with a totally different scenerio. This is a beginning, a new challenge that I must undertake. In a sense, it's like a final exam. You prepare yourself, but ultimately it all comes down to performance. You have gained the knowledge and the tools to succeed, but much of the success depends on your individual character and ability to perform in the moment. So am I regretful, slightly, but that's to be expected. I have a much greater sense of anticipation...