I need advice
I always try to give everyone advice--if they need it of course--but now, I really really REALLY need advice.
Driving home today, I saw there was a memorial set up at the accident site. ((where I saw the dead body)).
It's a small grave, and there was a small bouquet of blue roses.
Now, I can't stop crying, just thinking about it.
It made me relive everything of that day.
I'm prone to doing things I regret when I'm feeling strong emotions I don't like ((i.e. sadness)).
So, instead of resorting to cutting, I'm blogging about it instead.
I'm taking one step forward to taking control of my emotions instead of letting cutting take control of me. As you know, after 10 years of cutting, it is the worst habit in the world...but I'm trying so very hard to fight it.
Anyways: Should I buy some flowers someday, pull off to the side of the road, put the flowers on the memorial((/or grave. I couldn't tell)) and pray? I've never prayed before, but I want that person to know how sorry I am, and that I think about them every day. I have this strong urge to do it...it can't hurt, can it? Should I?
Or do you think I'm being a baby?
Too sensitive? Too weird?
Please, I really need advice.
I know I should just go to bed ((it's 3:00 AM))...but I can't get it off my mind...thank you.
Driving home today, I saw there was a memorial set up at the accident site. ((where I saw the dead body)).
It's a small grave, and there was a small bouquet of blue roses.
Now, I can't stop crying, just thinking about it.
It made me relive everything of that day.
I'm prone to doing things I regret when I'm feeling strong emotions I don't like ((i.e. sadness)).
So, instead of resorting to cutting, I'm blogging about it instead.
I'm taking one step forward to taking control of my emotions instead of letting cutting take control of me. As you know, after 10 years of cutting, it is the worst habit in the world...but I'm trying so very hard to fight it.
Anyways: Should I buy some flowers someday, pull off to the side of the road, put the flowers on the memorial((/or grave. I couldn't tell)) and pray? I've never prayed before, but I want that person to know how sorry I am, and that I think about them every day. I have this strong urge to do it...it can't hurt, can it? Should I?
Or do you think I'm being a baby?
Too sensitive? Too weird?
Please, I really need advice.
I know I should just go to bed ((it's 3:00 AM))...but I can't get it off my mind...thank you.