Bad Film, Bad! No Emmy, No Biscuit, and No Anything!
I saw Dragon Wars, today, and I wish - or at least part of me does - that I could unsee it.
Why haven't you heard of this movie? It's so awful, not an advertising adgency in the land could bother touching it beyond a single promotional poster I saw at the movie theater prior to seeing it. Every cinema sin is commited, from really bad acting to a horrible, plothole ridden storyline having to do with a "chosen one" and Power Ranger bad guys.
The Hero, Ethan Kendrick, is a young, floppy-haired reporter for the fictional movie channel, CGNN, who stumbled on the fact he was a reincarnation of a 1500's Korean warrior as a child from a Wise Old Shopkeeper. He's meant to protect the Damsel, Sara Daniels, a reincarnation of a "chosen" woman born every five hundred years with the "mark of a dragon" who's part of a Legend of Old. Then it just goes downhill.
The fight scenes with CGI cobras and dragons are slick but dumb, despite some cool explosions, and I almost fell asleep during the middle when a team of fighter pilots in downtown L.A. were shooting up some mini-dragons.
Saying that, the climax, while being cheesy (the rest of the movie certainly was), is almost good.
And it's wonderfully fun to laugh at.
See it for the Eastern dragons, see it for the previously-mentioned early-Power Ranger bad guy army dudes, see it to have a good round of MST3K with your fantasy-loving pals. Otherwise, go to D-Wars with the same expectations of a Sci-Fi Channel original movie on a Sunday afternoon.
Why haven't you heard of this movie? It's so awful, not an advertising adgency in the land could bother touching it beyond a single promotional poster I saw at the movie theater prior to seeing it. Every cinema sin is commited, from really bad acting to a horrible, plothole ridden storyline having to do with a "chosen one" and Power Ranger bad guys.
The Hero, Ethan Kendrick, is a young, floppy-haired reporter for the fictional movie channel, CGNN, who stumbled on the fact he was a reincarnation of a 1500's Korean warrior as a child from a Wise Old Shopkeeper. He's meant to protect the Damsel, Sara Daniels, a reincarnation of a "chosen" woman born every five hundred years with the "mark of a dragon" who's part of a Legend of Old. Then it just goes downhill.
The fight scenes with CGI cobras and dragons are slick but dumb, despite some cool explosions, and I almost fell asleep during the middle when a team of fighter pilots in downtown L.A. were shooting up some mini-dragons.
Saying that, the climax, while being cheesy (the rest of the movie certainly was), is almost good.
And it's wonderfully fun to laugh at.
See it for the Eastern dragons, see it for the previously-mentioned early-Power Ranger bad guy army dudes, see it to have a good round of MST3K with your fantasy-loving pals. Otherwise, go to D-Wars with the same expectations of a Sci-Fi Channel original movie on a Sunday afternoon.