The Beckoning of Angels Post 2
The next day, my father took me with him to find out what our allotments would be. Evidently a family of four got a milk cow and twelve chickens for eggs. The butchering of beef cows, hogs and chickens was done as a whole by the men in the commune and then divided out, according to the size of the family. We had a small refrigerator and a very small freezer, but it would suffice. My father and I went to retrieve our small chicken coop. It looked like a doghouse to me. We assembled it and put up a fence of chicken wire so the cow wouldn’t trample the chickens. My father admitted to me that he didn’t know any more about this kind of thing than I did. All my family were city dwellers. This kind of life was alien to us all. Fortunately, each dwelling was surrounded by a fence to keep the cows in, so we didn’t have to figure out how to do that! We got things set up, got our cow and our chickens and some feed for both. We were told the chickens would eat bugs and stuff and the cow could graze, but in the winter months, they would have to be fed more feed. We each had a small and large tub we could fill with water from a hose to water our livestock. I had to admit, weird though I thought these church people to be, they had it together on the survival front.
It was only slightly after lunch and I felt like I’d worked for days! Through the morning, all I could think of was going to the river again and seeing the angels. They kept rolling across my mind the whole day. Finally we had a few hours before dinner. My father decided to take a nap. Beck must have gone to Josh’s, so I headed straight for the river. I found the exact spot where I’d seen the beautiful creatures before and sat, waiting and hoping. I saw the sun getting low on the horizon and, disappointed, headed home. When I got there, Mom and Beck were just putting up curtains in the living room. Beck smiled at me.
“Mom and I went to pick out material for curtains today. Since all the houses are the same, all we had to do was pick out colors and patterns we liked. I picked blue for your room. I hope that’s okay.”
“Yeah, sure.”
“They’ve ordered blinds but they won’t arrive for a while,” my mom said.
I couldn’t believe I was actually beginning to be okay with being here. I still missed Will. I knew I’d never find a friend like him here, but I was at least beginning to feel a bit more comfortable in this place.
*~*~*~*
Our modular house began to take on more of an appearance of being a home. Beck and I were free to do whatever we wanted after our chores were done. We had a discussion after dinner one night when our father doled out responsibilities to us. Our Mom would cook and clean with Beck’s help. My father and I would tend to the animals and fix or build anything we needed. We’d all be responsible for going to the communal meetings, and much to my dislike, I would be helping with the butchering of animals on occasion, where we would learn how to save the fat for cooking, and use all the parts of the animals for whatever we could. I was kind of grossed out by the whole idea, but this was about survival, so I tried to set my mind on that. Someone came to our house to show us how to milk the cow and how to make butter and cheese. We had a warehouse of supplies that we were allotted a certain amount of access. There we could get sugar, salt, flour, and an assortment of basic goods. We still had the weekly church thing, but the preacher here was far more laid back, preaching about getting along and being thankful and stuff like that. No weird intolerant crap. Beck and I were much more at ease.
I overheard my parents talking one night and they were lamenting that no one seemed to be interested in providing any kind of liquor or spirits. My parents had always enjoyed a cocktail or two before dinner, but that seemed to be nonexistent here. I felt sorry for them. We, at least, had Josh’s crop to help us cope with this place.
Things seemed to be going along pretty well. Beck had convinced our parents that Josh was a fine upstanding youth, and after introducing him to them, they pretty much had agreed and had no problem with Beck spending time with him. I was happy for her. She mentioned his sister, Liz and that we were the same age and that we usually went out together, further reassuring our parents that everything was on the up and up. Even though Liz and I just wanted to be friends, we had a lot of good times with Beck and Josh, our parents none the wiser.
One day when Beck and Josh were together, I decided to ask my father if I could go fishing in the river.
“That’s a great idea! Fresh fish would make for a great meal. Let’s make a fishing rod and hook for you. We’ll dig some worms and the rest is up to you,” he said with a wide grin.
After fashioning a makeshift rod and hook, I set off to fish. Of course it was just a ruse to catch a glimpse of the angels again, but if I caught a dinner for us, that would be great, too, and now I had the perfect excuse to go to the river anytime I wanted.
I walked the banks of the river until I came to the place where I’d seen the beautiful creatures. I sat on the bank and cast my line into the water. I really hoped I’d catch something so I’d have a good reason to do this frequently. I fished for quite some time with no success when I heard voices. I quickly pulled my line out of the water and hid behind the lush low plant growth.
Soon, I saw them: the gorgeous creatures I’d seen before. They settled themselves on the high rocks. Some sunned themselves, some disrobed and swam and the rest sat, talking and laughing, sharing bottles and partaking of food they’d brought. I was riveted, mesmerized, smitten. They were so beautiful. My heart ached and my body longed for them. What was wrong with me? They were angels. I begged forgiveness for my carnal thoughts about them. I remembered another bizarre story from the Bible where three angels came into a town to a man’s house and the men of the town surrounded the man’s house and demanded that he send the angels out so they could have sex with them. The man instead sent out his daughters so that the angels would not be subjected to such a thing. What a bizarre story! What kind of a father would do such a thing? But then…I’d seen the angels. I guessed men couldn’t help themselves, being the barbaric beings that we are.
I rubbed my hands over my face, ashamed at the way I felt. I watched them as they swam, ate, drank and conversed until they finally left. It was getting on to dusk but it seemed to me as if only a few moments had passed. I decided to try once again to catch at least one fish to show for my all day trip. To my complete surprise, something tugged strongly on my line. I backed up until I’d landed my catch. It was a very large catfish. I didn’t have anything to put it in so I just dangled it from my line until I reached home.
When I came inside, proudly showing my catch, my parents were very happy.
“Wow!” my Dad exclaimed. “This is at least a dinner!”
My Mom smiled as my Dad put his arm around me. He took the catfish into the kitchen where my Mom readied it for dinner.
Soon Beck came home and when she was told how the dinner came about, she came over to me, put her arm around me and said, “Way to go, Tom!” I looked at her, smiling, a little embarrassed but somewhat proud of myself, too.
We enjoyed a dinner of catfish, rice and peas. Our Mom had made a cake for dessert, so we had quite a feast.
After we helped clean up after dinner, Beck said, “Can Tom and I go over to Josh’s?”
Our parents looked to each other and our Dad said, “Sure.”
Beck and I left and headed for Josh’s house.
“That was an awesome catch, Tom. How did you manage it?”
“I just lucked out,” I said.
Beck laughed.
When we got to Josh’s, he and Liz came out and we headed off for the river, or more decidedly, to Josh’s crop by the river. Josh picked enough weed for us, got his pipe and we made for the rocks, where we’d been before.
The sky was overcast and the awesome view of the stars was nonexistent that night but we still had a high time. We smoked, laughed, talked and thoroughly enjoyed ourselves. Josh and Beck began making out and then left, telling us they’d be back, so Liz and I were once again left alone.
“You want to take a walk along the river?” Liz suggested.
“Sure.”
We set out, high and somewhat unsure but determined. We walked quite a way and then we both decided we needed to sit and rest for a time.
After sitting a while in silence, Liz asked, “Have you ever kissed a girl?”
I wanted to lie and say, “Sure, lots of times.” But since it was Liz, I decided to tell the truth.
“No. I’m embarrassed to say.”
She snickered. “I’ve never kissed a boy, either.”
Then she looked into my eyes. “Do you want to try - just as friends, of course, just to see…?”
I saw the pleading, curious look in her eyes and answered, “Sure.”
I moved closer to her and she closed her eyes and parted her lips. I pressed my lips to hers and kept them there for a few moments. Her lips felt warm on my own, a not unpleasant feeling, then we drew apart. After a few moments, I looked into her eyes. She looked into mine, blinking.
“Did you feel anything?” she asked.
“Your lips felt warm,” I answered.
“Yours did, too.”
“Did you feel anything else?”
“No,” she said.
“Me, neither.”
Then we both laughed, a bit embarrassed.
“I guess we’re not ready for all this,” I said.
“Yeah, I guess you’re right.”
“Let’s go back to the rock, smoke some more and wait for Josh and Beck,” I suggested.
“Sounds great to me.”
After quite some time, Josh and Beck returned, we smoked some more and then decided we’d better go back.
On the way home Beck sighed and said, “I think I’m really falling for Josh.”
I looked over at her. She was smiling.
“It was different with Travis. He was fun and hot and all that, but Josh is…he’s more than that. Well, he’s that and more. He’s--” She looked down and appeared suddenly serious. “I wish I’d, you know, saved myself for him instead of…”
I patted her shoulder. “I’m sure he doesn’t care about that. What matters is what you feel for each other, you know - now. Right?”
“I guess.”
“I can see he’s smitten. I think he was from the first time he saw you.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, he was obviously trying to impress you from the first.”
She smiled widely. “Thanks, Tom.”
We got to our house and went in and to bed.
*~*~*~*
Several days later after our chores were done, Beck told me she was going to Josh’s and I told her I was going to the river.
“Going to catch more fish for dinner?” she asked.
“Maybe. See you later.”
I made my way along the riverbank until I came to the place where the angels had appeared. I waited expectantly and my patience was finally rewarded. The heavenly creatures appeared as before, laughing, swimming, eating and drinking. I couldn’t take my eyes off them. I was hypnotized by their beauty and bearing. I was completely lost in observing them when suddenly, the spell was broken.
“Tom?”
I snapped my head toward the voice. It was Liz.
I just stared at her, not knowing what to say. She looked in the direction of the angels and gasped. Instinctively, it seemed, she ducked down and hid with me behind the bushes.
“My God!” she exclaimed. “They’re beautiful. Who are they? What are they?”
“I…I don’t know. I’m not sure. I think they’re angels.”
“God, they’re gorgeous! I think you’re right. Have you seen them before?”
“Yeah. I saw them once and kept coming back, hoping to see them again. I’ve seen them twice before and then again this time. They come here to swim and relax, it seems.”
Liz covered her mouth with her hand, wide-eyed and then said, “Their bodies…they’re male, but more. Their boy parts look like flower buds. They can’t be human, can they?” She looked to me.
“I don’t think so.”
“Have you told anyone about them?”
“No! And I’d appreciate it if you didn’t, either, okay?”
She looked into my eyes. “Okay. I promise. This will be our secret.”
I smiled, relieved. “Thanks. I was going to tell Beck, but I had to make sure I was seeing what I was seeing. It’s okay to tell Josh and Beck, but I think we need to show them before we tell them.”
“I agree. They’d never believe it unless they saw it for themselves.” Liz turned to me excitedly. “Let’s bring them here without telling them exactly why.”
I nodded my agreement.
“Do they come at a certain time?”
“No. I just kept looking for them. They come at random, but they do come to the same place.”
“Let’s bring Josh and Beck here and tell them there’s something special here and just keep coming until we see them.”
I laughed. “They’ll think we’ve lost our minds. They’ll probably lose interest.”
“Not if we tell them it’s something phenomenal. If we’re secretive about what exactly it is, they’ll be intrigued. Wouldn’t you be?”
“Yeah, I guess you’re right. Okay, we’ll tell them tomorrow night.”
The following night, we did just that. We led them to the place and waited. It was dusk when we got there. We smoked some pot and waited. Nothing happened. The comely creatures didn’t appear. We still had a good time and then headed for home. On the way back, I took Liz aside and told her quietly, “I think they only come in the daytime. They come to swim and relax. After dark is too late. I’ve only seen them in the afternoon. We need to bring Josh and Beck here then.”
Liz nodded. “Let’s tell them we need to come in the day to see the ‘secret.‘”
“Okay. You tell Josh and I’ll tell Beck.”
She gave me a conspiratorial smile.
When we parted ways, I said to Beck, “I think we need to go to the same place in the daytime. The secret thing we want to show you won’t happen after dusk.”
Beck gave me a doubtful look.
“Seriously! What we want to show you is well worth the time and effort. You’ll see if you’ll just bear with us.”
“Okay, weird brother of mine, I’m game. I can’t imagine what you and Liz have cooked up, but I’m very curious and so is Josh. We’ll play along.”
“Good! I promise, when you see what we’re waiting for, you won’t be disappointed.”
*~*~*~*
Because of inclement weather, we couldn’t go to the river for three days. Finally, on a sunny, windy day, we were able to go after lunch and after our chores were done. Josh, Beck, Liz and I headed for the spot at the river. Josh had his stash with him, so after we got to the spot, we smoked and mellowed out, waiting. I was just about to give up when I heard voices. The others obviously heard them, too, because we all scurried behind the bushes, hiding ourselves.
Then the beautiful creatures emerged from the trees across the river. They settled on the rocks, some drinking and talking, some eating and then some of them stripped to swim. I heard my sister gasp as she covered her mouth with her hands. Liz and I locked gazes and shared a satisfied grin. Josh was still staring across the river, at a loss for words, it seemed.
My sister was the first to try to speak.
“What, who are they?”
“I don’t know,” I replied.
“They--” she stuttered. “They don’t look human. They look…”
“Like angels,” I finished.
“Maybe,” Beck continued. “But they, they have…something more than humans have. They have an enhanced…male part. It’s exquisite, like a flower or a bud on a stalk or…”
Josh spoke next, I think a bit put off by Beck’s spellbound impressions.
“They’re freaks of nature. Maybe they’re even dangerous. We should be careful.”
“No!” my sister said. “They’re not of this world. They’re obviously also no threat. They’re probably what Tom said - angels. Who’d have thought? We are being protected. I’d have never believed what our parents said about this place, but maybe it’s true. It’s a safe haven from the troubles of the world. What other explanation is there?” She looked to Josh.
He looked dubious, but then relaxed, shrugged and smiled at my sister.
“I don’t have one. Maybe you’re right.” He moved to embrace Beck and they connected on some level unknown to Liz and me.
I looked to Josh and Beck and Josh, to my surprise, spoke.
“We have to keep this to ourselves. We can’t speak of this to anyone but those of us here, now.”
I was completely relieved and nodded my agreement, as did the others.
We watched as the lovely creatures swam, drank, ate and talked. Finally after a time, I couldn’t determine how long, they gathered up their things, dressed and headed off into the trees on the opposite side of the river. After they’d gone we were all quiet for a time.
“So, what do you think?” I finally asked.
Beck looked at me. “I think they’re awesome, beautiful, ethereal, and not of this world.”
Liz spoke next. “They’re the most gorgeous creatures I’ve ever seen! They have to be angels!”
I looked to Josh, who looked confused and disdainful. “I’m not sure what I think. They may be placed here to fool us, to take us in and…I don’t know.”
Beck moved over to Josh and took him into her arms. I heard their exchange, even though I thought it wasn’t meant for my ears.
“They’re angels or some kind of otherworldly beings. Even if they were something evil, I’d have you to protect me. We need to be close, no matter what these beings are. I think they’re benevolent, but whatever happens, I want to be close to you.”
Josh relented as he and Beck melded into a kiss.
I looked to Liz who gave me a smirk.
I made a mental note to myself, remember this: females hold sway over us. They’re stronger, don’t fool yourself. It’s not necessarily a bad thing, but it is a fact, just be aware.
We headed for home, but Josh said, “Let’s have one for the road.”
We all agreed, of course, but I couldn’t help thinking that he wanted to get stoned again because the sights we showed him affected him beyond what he’d expected. I hoped he wouldn’t do something to ruin what we’d discovered. It was more important to me than I’d originally thought. I knew Josh didn’t like the fascination Beck had for the ethereal creatures. Liz had the same reaction, but I was glad she and my sister had had it. I had it, too. I wasn’t sure what that said about me but I didn’t care. I just wanted the creatures to remain our secret. I had fears of what would happen if the people in our community found out about them. I was afraid that they would try to do them harm, not understanding who and what they were. I knew that the people in our church would not accept them, even though they were angels. They wouldn’t see it. They were too blind. Later that night I couldn’t sleep and went into Beck’s room to talk to her.
“Beck?” I moved closer to her bed and roused her. “Beck!” She stirred and woke up.
“Mmmm, Tom?”
“Yeah. We have to talk.”
“Can’t it wait?” She yawned.
“No. It can’t.”
She sat up, sleepily and yawned again. “Okay. What is it?”
“I’m afraid that Josh is going to tell someone about the angels.”
“What? Why would he do that?”
“I don’t know. I’m just afraid. He didn’t seem to be as taken with them as the rest of us were. I think he sees them as a threat or something.”
“What? No, he’s okay with them.”
“I don’t think so. If he tells someone about them, they’ll misunderstand, I know it and then, then…I don’t want them to be hurt or scared away. I couldn’t bear it if…”
“What are you really saying, Tom?”
I stared into my sister’s eyes. “I’m saying that I…that I’m really drawn to them, that I’d like to be like them, that--” I shook my head. “I know that’s ridiculous and impossible, but I don’t want any harm to come to them or for there to be any conflict between them and us. It would be all my fault and I couldn’t stand it. We need to live our lives and let them live theirs. Do you understand?”
She put her hands on my shoulders. “Yes. Yes, I understand, Tom. I’ll speak to Josh. I’ll try to make sure he doesn’t tell anyone, okay?”
“Okay.”
I felt somewhat reassured because I felt Josh would never do anything if my sister asked him not to, but I still thought: what if he already told?
I actually prayed until I finally fell asleep.
*~*~*~*
I was very anxious for Beck to go see Josh and reiterate how important it was to keep the angels a secret. I felt such a strong affinity for them that defied explanation. I worried about them and couldn’t bear the thought of never seeing them again. But what harm could possibly come to angels? They were immortal. My thoughts and feelings didn’t make any sense but I couldn’t help myself. Something deep inside me began to make me think they really weren’t angels. I felt that maybe they were some kind of race of beings from some other realm or something. I obsessed about them constantly and lived for the next time I’d see them. I began to have ideas of actually communicating with them someday. I could catch a word or phrase of theirs on occasion and they spoke our language, but I feared that I’d scare them off if I made myself known and I couldn’t bear that.
Beck came back the next afternoon from visiting with Josh and assured me that he wasn’t going to tell anyone about the angels. I felt somewhat reassured. She told me that he actually liked that we had such an awesome secret from everyone else. That made me rest a little easier. I knew that Liz and Beck wouldn’t betray our secret. Josh was the only one I wasn’t sure of. And my sister had somewhat assuaged my consternation.
The next day, after lunch and after all the chores were done, I headed for the river. I took my fishing rod, hoping to catch something for dinner, but of course, my main agenda was catching a glimpse of the gorgeous creatures.
I cast my line into the river for a while when I heard their voices. I quickly pulled it out of the water and hid myself to watch them. They settled themselves on the rocks as usual and ate, drank and skinny-dipped. I was so mesmerized and focused on them that I didn’t notice someone on my side of the river. His voice startled me.
“Hey, you don’t have to hide, you know.”
I looked over to see one of the angels standing only yards away from me, his fishing line in the river. He was clad in nothing but a very form-fitting pair of pants.
I was paralyzed. Thoughts coursed through my mind, yet I couldn’t concentrate on them. I stood up, blinking at him, mute and dumbfounded. He was beautiful: blond, tall, thin, built to perfection. I was stunned. He flashed an indescribably luscious smile my way.
“Come out, young one. I won’t hurt you.”
I walked out of my hiding place like a zombie, an automaton, a moth to a flame, staring blatantly at the vision of perfection before me.
“That’s better,” the vision responded. “I’m Andren. What’s your name?”
At first I couldn’t speak but after a few moments I found my voice and gathered my thoughts enough to answer.
“Tom, uh, Thomas. Tom.”
“Well, Tom, nice to meet you.”
I just stared.
“You’ve been here before haven’t you?”
I froze. Oh, God! They know I’ve been spying. The terror must have shown obviously on my face.
“It’s okay. We don’t mind. Don’t look so scared. We can sense the presence of others and can usually determine whether they’re potential friends or foes.”
I tried to relax. There was so much I wanted to know, so many questions I wanted to ask but I just stood there.
“Have you had any luck? With fishing here, I mean.”
I nodded. “Last week I caught a big catfish.”
“Good! Then I guess I’m not wasting my time trying this side of the river.”
I couldn’t take my eyes off him. I stared like an idiot. I just couldn’t help myself. The vision smiled at me.
“Are you…angels?” I ventured.
He laughed, a lovely musical sound. “No. We’re hara.”
“Hara?” I parroted, mindlessly.
“Yes. We’re hara, Wraeththu.”
Wraeththu? How could this be? Weren’t these the creatures we’d fled from? My face must have mirrored my fear.
“I’m guessing you’ve heard nothing but bad things about us. It’s probably why you’re living way out here. There are a lot of our race who are destructive and give the rest of us a bad name. My clan is peaceful. That’s why we’ve settled this far out; to live our lives away from all the violence, not unlike your people, I suspect. We aren’t all violent, just like humans aren’t all violent.”
“I knew it! I just got…good vibes from you.”
He smiled. “Have you told anyone about us?”
I felt bad that I’d told, but I had to be truthful.
“I told my sister, her boyfriend and his sister. They swore they wouldn’t tell anyone else. I believe them.”
“We wouldn’t mind having a friendly relationship with the humans out here, but we feel they’d be afraid. They’d assume we’d be like the hara they feared.”
“Yeah, I don’t think they’d understand. That’s why I wanted to keep our seeing you a secret.”
“They’d probably feel threatened,” Andren said. “They’d be afraid that we’d kidnap their young men and boys. But we wouldn’t do that. They would be free to become one of us or not. We’d never force them.”
I felt a thrill go through me. Become one of them? I had to know more.
“What do you mean, become one of you?”
“Any young human male from about twelve to around twenty-five can become har if he wants to. It involves a painful transformation, which we can make bearable with herbs, healing techniques and medications, but at the end of it all, he’s one of us. We live longer than humans, we’re stronger - practically indestructible, healthier, more beautiful, we have psychic powers, we can do magic. There’s a lot to be said for being har.”
“You mean I could be like you?”
“Yes. Completely.”
I stared into space, trying to process the information. I could be one of them? Oh, God! Could this really be true?
“What would this mean, exactly? Would I have to abandon my family?”
“Well, yes, essentially. Once you’re har, you leave your humanity behind.”
“But, I’d be just across the river…”
“Still, you’d be miles away bodily and spiritually. It’s not a decision made easily.”
I was a bit disillusioned, but I had to know more.
“How would this transformation happen, exactly?”
“Well, a har would cut his arm and cut your arm and mingle his blood with yours. A while after, you would go through a change that we call ‘althaia.’ It takes anywhere from three to five days. After that, you’d be har. Then we’d probably have a celebration, you’d take your first aruna and afterward begin your harish life.”
“Aruna?”
“Yes. Aruna is harish sex and it’s an integral part of the change. In fact, it’s absolutely necessary to seal your transformation.”
I was a bit confused.
“Were all hara human once?”
“Yes, as far as I know, with the possible exception of the Aghama. He was the first of our kind and his origins are shrouded in mystery. There’s also speculation about hara procreating, but I haven’t seen evidence of that, yet. Maybe that’s in our future.”
I was a jumble of feelings and thoughts. I wanted to be one of them but I loved my family. I couldn’t imagine life without Beck and my parents yet…there they were, the beings that pervaded my every thought and dream. I wanted nothing more than to become one of them. Now I knew it could be a reality. But I was torn. Why did this have to be so difficult? Like a shot, another question arose in my mind.
“You spoke about procreation and sex…aruna. Are they’re females of you as well?”
“No. We’re hermaphrodites.”
I’m sure I looked perplexed.
“It means each of us is both male and female. We call it ouana and soume, ouana being the male and soume being the female equivalent, roughly.”
I’m sure I stared stupidly as I tried to figure out the logistics.
“When hara have sex, one usually takes the soume role and the other, the ouana. Of course there’s lots of room for ‘innovation,’” he said with a somewhat randy smile.
I blinked at him, utterly overwhelmed.
Andren suddenly reeled in his fishing line.
“Whoa! Hey, I’ve caught a fair sized trout! This side of the river is a good place! We’ll have a fish to cook tonight!”
Beautiful Andren looked over at me.
“I’ve caught a nice fish today. Have I maybe caught a lovely red-haired boy as well?” He smiled benevolently.
“I don’t know. I’m not sure…”
“You need to think about it. Becoming har is a huge decision, not one to be made lightly. Give it some thought. I’d be delighted if you became one of us. You’re quite lovely as you are, but as har you’d be breathtaking, I’m sure.” He flashed me another smile that seemed to melt my insides. “Please remember me if you decide to join us. We’ll be back here on occasion. Please make yourself known to us if you want to become Wraeththu. We’ll be more than happy to have you! Hope to see you again, Tom.”
He walked down to the riverside and swam over to the others. He gave me a look back before heading off to his kindred. I was stunned, at a loss. It was all too much for me to process. I stayed there for quite a while before I felt like I could join my family in the real world again.
**~~> to be continued <~~**