Bleach Drabble (406-407)
This is me trying to be productive today. o.o
406.
Title: Biological Clock
Rating: PG-13
Pairing/Character/s: ShuuxYumi, Iba, Renji, lightly IkkakuxKira
Word Count: 575
Warning/s: No spoilers I can imagine. Just um, OOC crack. XD
Summary: Babies.
Dedication: Anyone who writes me ShuuxYumi right now, I mean it. WITHDRAWAL.
A/N: Yeaaah, I don’t know where this came from either. O.o
Shuuhei sighs, and after a minute, furrows his brow and looks at Ikkaku. “Um. Guys don’t have biological clocks, right?”
Ikkaku blinks. “The hell is that? Plant that tells time or somethin’?”
Shuuhei stares at the bald shinigami for a moment.
Very slowly, he turns to Iba. “Guys aren’t supposed to have biological clocks, right?”
Tetsuzaemon shrugs. “I’d prefer a watch, I suppose. ‘s more portable.”
Shuuhei stares some more.
Turns to Renji.
“Oi, Renji…Guys aren’t…”
“Don’t know what the fuck you’re talkin’ ‘bout either!” Renji states, poking warily at his cafeteria gruel. “Ain’t even gonna pretend.”
Shuuhei supposes he can appreciate that.
He turns to Kira, who, in retrospect, he probably should have asked first. “Oi, Kira…”
“I…um, I don’t think so?” the blonde answers, brow furrowing. “Why?”
Shuuhei sighs. “Yumi wants babies.”
Everyone chokes.
Well, everyone except Ikkaku, who snorts at that like it’s old news before turning back to Kira, trying to slip his hands under the blonde’s shita-gi while they eat.
Kira, smacking at the bald shinigami’s wandering fingers in a practiced manner, regains himself the quickest after Hisagi’s announcement and smiles a bit nervously at Shuuhei. “Er…what exactly do you mean by that?”
Hisagi sighs. “’xactly how it sounds. Yumi wants babies. Asked Ran ‘bout it and she snorted and said something about his biological clock ticking.”
The other men present blink. “He wants to have brats?”
Ikkaku, momentarily thwarted from getting his public Izuru-gropage for the day, sighs and puts his elbows on the table. “It’s Yachiru’s fault,” he says, like that explains everything.
Everyone stares at him.
“That don’t make a damn bit of sense,” Iba scoffs.
“He wants babies ‘cuz of Yachiru? Fuckin’ crazy.”
Ikkaku shrugs. “Believe me or don’t, bastards, but I’m tellin’ ya. Fukutaichou was a damned adorable baby. Now she’s bigger…don’t need as much lookin’ after.” Pause. “Well, in certain ways. Yumi’s probably just missin’ it, is all. Heck, sometimes I miss it.”
Kira turns to Madarame at the admission, beaming.
Ikkaku grins back, because that look in Izuru’s eye means he’s gonna get some gropage in after all.
Shuuhei frowns, trying to process this all at once. “So… he wants to make…more Yachirus?”
That makes everyone stop and think for a little bit…again.
“Fuckin’ crazy,” Iba declares.
“Insane,” Renji agrees.
Ikkaku, hands comfortably sliding into the slits of Kira’s hakama, pauses from nuzzling the blonde’s ear. “Look,” he says with a little sigh. “You guys weren’t there, alright? She was a cute little baby. Still cute, just eviler now, I guess. But I’m tellin’ ya. We did our best to, you know, make her self-sufficient. Didn’t turn out bad, you ask me.”
Everyone else supposes that they hadn’t failed.
Shuuhei sighs after a moment. “So. Babies.” His voice is a little bit faint.
Renji pauses. Rubs sheepishly at the back of his neck. “Um…not to uh, sound stupid or anything…”
“Too late,” Ikkaku interjects with a sneer.
Renji glares, but ignores the bald idiot. “How the hell’re the two’ve you gonna get babies anyway?”
Shuuhei blinks, not having thought about it beyond the fact that Yumi wanted them. “Huh. Dunno.”
The redhead grins when he hears that, reaching out to clap his friend on the back in a congratulatory manner. “Well then, no worries, man! You’re perfectly safe.”
Iba nods, similarly relieved for his friend. “Yeah man. And I ain’t seen a stork ‘round seireitei in forever.”
Everyone stares.
Sighs.
Iba blinks. “What?”
END
407.
Title: Shot Through the Heart
Rating: PG-13
Pairing/Character/s: KyourakuxUkitake
Word Count: 441 officially, though 162 of them aren’t mine. XD
Warning/s: SAP FLUFF WAFF.
Summary: Storytime for Jyuushirou and Shun.
Dedication: sophiap- I don’t know how else to help! ^^;;
A/N:UM. Fairytale version stolen from: http://hca.gilead.org.il/ and the story entitled “The Saucy Boy.”
Shunsui steals a sideways look from the book he’s currently reading, a fond, crooked smile tugging at his lips when he catches Jyuushirou’s expression, the white-haired man’s cheeks flushed with contentment as they sit together in the shade, simply idling away some time together.
Jyuushirou tips his eyes upwards when Shunsui pauses, gently butts the other captain’s chin with the top of his head. “Don’t stop,” he chastises quietly, “this is my favorite part.”
“I know,” Shunsui murmurs, grinning and pressing a kiss to Ukitake’s hair, the taller captain resting his cheek against the soft strands before resuming his reading.
“But your bow is spoilt,” said the old poet.
“That would be unfortunate,” said the little boy, taking it up and looking at it. “Oh, it’s quite dry and isn’t damaged at all. The string is quite tight; I’ll try it.” So, drawing it back, he took an arrow, aimed, and shot the good old poet right in the heart. “Do you see now that my bow was not spoilt?” he said, and, loudly laughing, ran away. What a naughty boy to shoot the old poet like that, who had taken him into his warm room, had been so good to him, and had given him the nicest wine and the best apple!
The good old man lay upon the floor crying; he was really shot in the heart. “Oh!” he cried, “what a naughty boy this Cupid is! I shall tell all the good children about this, so that they take care never to play with him, lest he hurt them.”
Jyuushirou laughs there, eyes sparkling mirth as he reaches over his own heart with his hand. “Aa. That cupid, he is a bit of a scamp, isn’t he? Shooting us all so unsuspectingly,” he sighs quietly, leaning back more into Shunsui’s chest as he does.
Shunsui chuckles at that, closes his eyes and nuzzles close to the other man’s cheek. “A scamp indeed, my Jyuu-chan,” he agrees readily, momentarily forgetting story time as he seeks out the other captain’s lips. “But then again, you’ve always had a thing for rascals, eh?” he whispers, pausing when they’re just a breath apart.
Ukitake beams, reaches up to touch Kyouraku’s stubbly cheek. “Hmmm… I do at that, don’t I?” he admits readily, before closing his eyes and gently touching his lips to his lover’s.
The two of them smile into it, and wrapping his arms tighter around the other captain, Shunsui can’t help but think that he knows exactly how that old poet in the story feels.
The only difference is, he’s long since adapted to having been shot through the heart.
END
EDITS!
406.
Title: Biological Clock
Rating: PG-13
Pairing/Character/s: ShuuxYumi, Iba, Renji, lightly IkkakuxKira
Word Count: 575
Warning/s: No spoilers I can imagine. Just um, OOC crack. XD
Summary: Babies.
Dedication: Anyone who writes me ShuuxYumi right now, I mean it. WITHDRAWAL.
A/N: Yeaaah, I don’t know where this came from either. O.o
Shuuhei sighs, and after a minute, furrows his brow and looks at Ikkaku. “Um. Guys don’t have biological clocks, right?”
Ikkaku blinks. “The hell is that? Plant that tells time or somethin’?”
Shuuhei stares at the bald shinigami for a moment.
Very slowly, he turns to Iba. “Guys aren’t supposed to have biological clocks, right?”
Tetsuzaemon shrugs. “I’d prefer a watch, I suppose. ‘s more portable.”
Shuuhei stares some more.
Turns to Renji.
“Oi, Renji…Guys aren’t…”
“Don’t know what the fuck you’re talkin’ ‘bout either!” Renji states, poking warily at his cafeteria gruel. “Ain’t even gonna pretend.”
Shuuhei supposes he can appreciate that.
He turns to Kira, who, in retrospect, he probably should have asked first. “Oi, Kira…”
“I…um, I don’t think so?” the blonde answers, brow furrowing. “Why?”
Shuuhei sighs. “Yumi wants babies.”
Everyone chokes.
Well, everyone except Ikkaku, who snorts at that like it’s old news before turning back to Kira, trying to slip his hands under the blonde’s shita-gi while they eat.
Kira, smacking at the bald shinigami’s wandering fingers in a practiced manner, regains himself the quickest after Hisagi’s announcement and smiles a bit nervously at Shuuhei. “Er…what exactly do you mean by that?”
Hisagi sighs. “’xactly how it sounds. Yumi wants babies. Asked Ran ‘bout it and she snorted and said something about his biological clock ticking.”
The other men present blink. “He wants to have brats?”
Ikkaku, momentarily thwarted from getting his public Izuru-gropage for the day, sighs and puts his elbows on the table. “It’s Yachiru’s fault,” he says, like that explains everything.
Everyone stares at him.
“That don’t make a damn bit of sense,” Iba scoffs.
“He wants babies ‘cuz of Yachiru? Fuckin’ crazy.”
Ikkaku shrugs. “Believe me or don’t, bastards, but I’m tellin’ ya. Fukutaichou was a damned adorable baby. Now she’s bigger…don’t need as much lookin’ after.” Pause. “Well, in certain ways. Yumi’s probably just missin’ it, is all. Heck, sometimes I miss it.”
Kira turns to Madarame at the admission, beaming.
Ikkaku grins back, because that look in Izuru’s eye means he’s gonna get some gropage in after all.
Shuuhei frowns, trying to process this all at once. “So… he wants to make…more Yachirus?”
That makes everyone stop and think for a little bit…again.
“Fuckin’ crazy,” Iba declares.
“Insane,” Renji agrees.
Ikkaku, hands comfortably sliding into the slits of Kira’s hakama, pauses from nuzzling the blonde’s ear. “Look,” he says with a little sigh. “You guys weren’t there, alright? She was a cute little baby. Still cute, just eviler now, I guess. But I’m tellin’ ya. We did our best to, you know, make her self-sufficient. Didn’t turn out bad, you ask me.”
Everyone else supposes that they hadn’t failed.
Shuuhei sighs after a moment. “So. Babies.” His voice is a little bit faint.
Renji pauses. Rubs sheepishly at the back of his neck. “Um…not to uh, sound stupid or anything…”
“Too late,” Ikkaku interjects with a sneer.
Renji glares, but ignores the bald idiot. “How the hell’re the two’ve you gonna get babies anyway?”
Shuuhei blinks, not having thought about it beyond the fact that Yumi wanted them. “Huh. Dunno.”
The redhead grins when he hears that, reaching out to clap his friend on the back in a congratulatory manner. “Well then, no worries, man! You’re perfectly safe.”
Iba nods, similarly relieved for his friend. “Yeah man. And I ain’t seen a stork ‘round seireitei in forever.”
Everyone stares.
Sighs.
Iba blinks. “What?”
END
407.
Title: Shot Through the Heart
Rating: PG-13
Pairing/Character/s: KyourakuxUkitake
Word Count: 441 officially, though 162 of them aren’t mine. XD
Warning/s: SAP FLUFF WAFF.
Summary: Storytime for Jyuushirou and Shun.
Dedication: sophiap- I don’t know how else to help! ^^;;
A/N:UM. Fairytale version stolen from: http://hca.gilead.org.il/ and the story entitled “The Saucy Boy.”
Shunsui steals a sideways look from the book he’s currently reading, a fond, crooked smile tugging at his lips when he catches Jyuushirou’s expression, the white-haired man’s cheeks flushed with contentment as they sit together in the shade, simply idling away some time together.
Jyuushirou tips his eyes upwards when Shunsui pauses, gently butts the other captain’s chin with the top of his head. “Don’t stop,” he chastises quietly, “this is my favorite part.”
“I know,” Shunsui murmurs, grinning and pressing a kiss to Ukitake’s hair, the taller captain resting his cheek against the soft strands before resuming his reading.
“But your bow is spoilt,” said the old poet.
“That would be unfortunate,” said the little boy, taking it up and looking at it. “Oh, it’s quite dry and isn’t damaged at all. The string is quite tight; I’ll try it.” So, drawing it back, he took an arrow, aimed, and shot the good old poet right in the heart. “Do you see now that my bow was not spoilt?” he said, and, loudly laughing, ran away. What a naughty boy to shoot the old poet like that, who had taken him into his warm room, had been so good to him, and had given him the nicest wine and the best apple!
The good old man lay upon the floor crying; he was really shot in the heart. “Oh!” he cried, “what a naughty boy this Cupid is! I shall tell all the good children about this, so that they take care never to play with him, lest he hurt them.”
Jyuushirou laughs there, eyes sparkling mirth as he reaches over his own heart with his hand. “Aa. That cupid, he is a bit of a scamp, isn’t he? Shooting us all so unsuspectingly,” he sighs quietly, leaning back more into Shunsui’s chest as he does.
Shunsui chuckles at that, closes his eyes and nuzzles close to the other man’s cheek. “A scamp indeed, my Jyuu-chan,” he agrees readily, momentarily forgetting story time as he seeks out the other captain’s lips. “But then again, you’ve always had a thing for rascals, eh?” he whispers, pausing when they’re just a breath apart.
Ukitake beams, reaches up to touch Kyouraku’s stubbly cheek. “Hmmm… I do at that, don’t I?” he admits readily, before closing his eyes and gently touching his lips to his lover’s.
The two of them smile into it, and wrapping his arms tighter around the other captain, Shunsui can’t help but think that he knows exactly how that old poet in the story feels.
The only difference is, he’s long since adapted to having been shot through the heart.
END
EDITS!