HxH+Bleach- "The Human Animal"
GOD THIS IS CRAP.
AND I'M GOING TO HELL FOR IT.
Remember JaB, you're not allowed to read til you've read/watched HxH! I MEAN IT.
But at least this means one of my BILLION request fics is out of the way, as much as I'm GOING TO HELL for it.
WHY SUCH CRACKY REQUESTS? WHY?!
^^;;
Title: The Human Animal
Author: Celeste
Universe: Bleach, HunterxHunter
Theme/Topic: KilluaxHistugaya kiddie pron.
Rating: PG-15 (or more, depending on how you feel about oh, KIDDIE PRON).
Pairing: KilluaxHitsugaya
Spoilers: Through Bleach 187, no large HxH ones. Also, HUGE OOC warnings because HOW ELSE WAS I SUPPOSED TO MAKE THIS WORK?!
Word Count: 2,981
Time: A BILLION YEARS.
Summary: I’m going to hell. I’m going to hell, I’m going to hell, I’m going to hellhellhell.
Dedication: Ann’s fic request from me from A BILLION YEARS AGO and yeah, I haven’t gotten around to it ‘til just now. SORRY!
A/N: So the request was HistugayaxKillua PRON because Ann wanted to outdo JaB on the cracky requests. This is not a competition people! Think of us poor writers! *tears* But anyway, this is highly unlikely and highly OOC because OBVIOUSLY Hitsugaya wouldn’t be so damn EASY, but my only explanation is that Killua is OMG SO COOL. Seriously. That’s it. My whole explanation. Anyway, Ann’s request was, “Hitsugaya meets Killua and porn ensues: KILLUA MUST WIN.” So yeah. Here goes nothing. Shield your eyes, kids.
Distribution: Just lemme know.
Disclaimer: Not mine. Thankfully, in this case.
Tenth division captain Histugaya Toushirou stepped into one of the human realms currently within his jurisdiction with a look of obvious disdain, finding himself in a heavily wooded area in some undisclosed section of the dimension.
All that he knew was that this was the area in which two of his men had supposedly disappeared from and intelligence reports suggested that the lower ranking shinigami had been devoured by a particularly powerful Hollow that had staked its territory in these parts.
The young captain wasn’t particularly worried so much as annoyed, a Hollow that could take out a tenth chair was, ultimately, no big problem when it came to the pecking order of seireitei.
However, one that could kill a sixth chair was by protocol dictates, automatically labeled a serious threat and not wanting to take any chances after the fiasco with Aizen and the ryoka, orders had come in stating that Hitsugaya was to take care of the problem himself, as the area in question was under his team’s command.
Which was why he was here, and unhappy about it. Matsumoto could have undoubtedly taken care of the beast herself, but after the deaths of two squad-members, it seemed that Toushirou was obligated to deliver the killing blow…something about ceremony and due appearances expected of a captain-class shinigami.
He didn’t particularly think vengeance taken for show did anyone any good, but he wasn’t in charge like those shitty old men were. What he considered important was eliminating the threat in the most expedient manner possible, and that would have meant sending either Matsumoto or his third chair here while he remained in Soul Society to finish filing his reports concerning the Aizen incident such that the court could wash its hands of that foul memory and begin to rebuild.
Plus, he didn’t want to be here in the first place. He had never really liked the smell of the human world himself, but that wasn’t really an official type reason to abhor his current mission and thus, not worthy of mention.
Instead, the tenth division captain set about Hollow hunting, planning on getting everything squared away within the next few hours so he could return ahead of schedule.
Opting not to use the phone-device given to him by the Research and Technology Institute just prior to his departure as a Hollow that supposedly strong would be detectable from great distances without the use of such a thing, Toushirou closed his eyes and instead, began thinning and extending the perimeter of his reiatsu.
After reaching several kilometers in diameter, he concluded that his current territory included nothing but animals- some woodland ones and even fewer human ones as far as he could tell.
No Hollow within his immediate vicinity.
Making note, he moved towards the area in which he’d sensed human beasts, assuming that if a Hollow was to grow hungry, his best bed would be in that direction.
Several uneventful hours passed as he swept the miles surrounding the target coordinates given to him in his mission report, and he was beginning to think that the reports were false and that his two seats had deserted.
Stopping in another uninhabited forest area, the young captain paused for a rest beside a trickling stream in order to rethink his searching strategy, as his current one was proving fruitless.
Granted, his mission statement allotted three days in which he had to accomplish his task, but if possible, he would have liked to do it in one and return to seireitei as soon as possible.
Digging into his pocket for a food ration that Matsumoto had prepared for him upon his departure, he tore it from its package and noted with some distaste, that it was chocolate flavored. Sighing, he bit into it anyway and wondered to himself if the outlaw Hollow hadn’t already left the area after killing two shinigami, doubtless wary of the fact that more and more death gods would come for it the longer its fatality list grew.
It was a very likely scenario if the Hollow was more intelligent than a dog, and Toushirou, standing after his meal was finished, decided that that was strong enough a point to radio back to Soul Society with in the hopes of getting clearance to return until more intelligence could be gathered.
And he would have gone through with it too, except the distinct roar of a Hollow suddenly thundered in his ears, breaking his train of thought as he felt an accompanying burst of power that could only mean…
“Menos,” he muttered, grabbing Hyourinmaru’s hilt and dashing off in the direction of the disturbance.
~~~~~
Getting a read on the situation, he cursed when he sensed not just one overwhelming murderous aura, but two.
That would explain the easy deaths of two of his subordinates. Two Menos working in tandem to surprise any shinigami with a rank lower than third chair was infinitely possible, and scowling, the tenth division captain carefully cloaked his own reiatsu as he attempted to read the levels of his soon-to-be opponents.
It was strange… he could very distinctly pick out the lower-leveled Menos’ dark energy, but as he probed for information regarding the second of the two, the reiatsu shifted, morphing under the almost imperceptible touch of his own, growing sometimes, fading sometimes, almost playfully teasing his.
He didn’t like being teased.
Moments later he had a confirmed visual of the lower-level threat, and drawing his sword, prepared to attack from a distance before moving in to search for the second energy source. However, just as he was about to unleash his shikai, he watched, wide-eyed, as the Menos stumbled and fell over, enveloped in a strange purple glow and yowling disconsolately.
Too surprised to think properly, Toushirou found himself dashing forward to meet the writhing Hollow, only to watch in disbelief, as a boy who looked no older than Toushirou himself danced out of the Menos’ clawing hands and delivered a fierce kick to its mask, creating a crack in the thick white shell.
The beast roared in agony and prepared to lash out with its strongest beam attack while the boy, making note of the crack, performed what looked to be several hundred flash steps out of the way of the deadly energy bomb, landing lithely on the Menos’ long pointed nose.
Hitsugaya until that moment, had never before seen a Menos’ mask ripped off by way of gripping its empty eye sockets and…pulling.
The mask shattered in half as the upper portion was pulled clean off, the boy-warrior lifting it effortlessly between two hands and swinging it around to collide with the remaining bottom half, shattering both into a thousand pieces on impact.
The Menos dissolved with one last, plaintive cry.
“Aaah, that one was the most troublesome one yet!” the boy exclaimed, only sounding slightly out of breath as he wiped his hands off on the back of his pants. “Have you ever heard a monster so loud?” he asked then, turning to Hitsugaya like he knew he’d been there the entire time and smiling. “Yo.”
Toushirou’s eyes narrowed as he instinctively went on the defensive. The young boy before him was obviously a threat, but more information was required before Hitsugaya could know for sure, the level of danger the child presented. “You. Who are you? Are you human?” he demanded gruffly, reaching out with his reiatsu again to test the boy’s responses.
At the question, the other white-haired kid merely blinked back at the shinigami. “The last time I checked, I was” he replied simply, giving the young shinigami a look that for some reason, ended up pissing him off a little bit. “Why, aren’t you?”
Histugaya couldn’t help but feel insulted at the assumption. “Of course I’m not human. I’m a death god,” he announced imperiously.
The boy blinked again. “Eh? I’ve heard lots of guys say that they’re death gods. But after I beat them, they only end up being humans in the end,” the other white-haired boy said conversationally, putting his hands in his pockets and relaxing his pose.
Like he hadn’t just ripped the head off of a Gilan-class Menos with no visible weapons save for his own two hands.
He definitely couldn’t be human.
“I’ll ask you again,” Histugaya stated coolly, resting his hand on Hourinmaru’s hilt. “What are you?”
“Mmm…Killua, I guess,” the kid responded after a moment of thought. “Is that the answer you want?”
Histugaya blinked. “I’ve never heard of any race that calls itself “Killuas” before,” the young shinigami challenged, growing impatient with the child’s obtuseness.
“Well… I guess because there’s only me, really,” Killua replied with a shrug of one shoulder. “I’m Killua.”
Toushirou frowned. “You mean your name.”
“Yes, if that’s what you meant by your question.”
Hitsugaya was beginning to seriously dislike this Killua, whatever he was. But it was best to tread carefully as he didn’t yet know the true extent of the other boy’s power. “That’s not what I meant,” he reiterated, increasing the pressure of his reiatsu experimentally. “I want to know what you are. Mere humans cannot achieve the sort of power you have.”
Killua smiled. “Well, I guess I’m a Hunter too then. Is that okay?” he asked, sounding far too cheerful even in the presence of Hitsugaya’s probing reiatsu.
Anyone normal who had the percentage of spiritual pressure being put on them that Toushirou was currently putting on Killua would have been incapacitated by now. As it was, all Hitsugaya sensed was the boy’s own power holding up against his, not attacking back, but defending almost naturally.
“A…Hunter, is it?” Toushirou tested the word on his tongue and decided that it felt as foreign as the word “Killua” had. “You aren’t human after all then.”
“I’m just as human as you, I think,” Killua retorted, looking childishly put out by Toushirou’s declaration.
Toushirou smirked. “Don’t compare me to those kinds of animals,” he drawled. “I’m not the same at all.”
Killua’s eyebrow arched. “Ho? Above animals now huh? You sound human,” he pushed, accompanying his words with a slight push of his own power against the shinigami’s.
“I already told you. I’m a death god.”
“I see, I see.” Killua nodded, but the glint in his eyes told Toushirou that the so-called Hunter was only humoring him. “So, then death god-san, according to you, you’re better than us human animals, ne?”
“Of course. Which is why I’m here to tell you, whatever you are, not to kill either Menos or regular Hollows anymore. It’s outside of your jurisdiction as you are far too ill-equipped to deal with such monsters.”
Killua grinned. “Wooow, then I must have been really lucky just now!” he laughed, not looking off-put at all by Toushirou’s purposeful barbs. “So… those things are called Menos, eh? Or Hollows?”
“Tch, figures you wouldn’t know the difference,” Histugaya allowed with a snort. “Further proof that you have no business dealing with them.”
“Aaaa, but I’ve been killing those things for a long time now,” Killua began with a small pout. “They make a lot of noise and are rather dangerous if you let them do what they want. Isn’t it best if I just kill them when they come like that?”
“Mere humans are forbidden from engaging Hollows as a general rule,” Toushirou recited precisely. “Only those who wield zanpakutou can properly exorcise Hollow spirits to their rightful states.”
“And that would be you?”
“Yes.”
“Because you’re a…” Killua paused and smirked, “death god?”
Hitsugaya scowled. “Yes.”
“Mmmm…since you look so normal, death god-san… what makes you different from humans so I know next time, eh?”
Hitsugaya thought that should have been obvious. It wasn’t like shinigami were prancing around where everyone could see them all the time every day. “Well, my clothes obviously.”
Killua grinned slyly. “Eeh? So all I have to do is get the right outfit? Then can I be the same as death god-san?”
“Of course not.”
“Huh. Then it’s not just the clothes. Ne, what else, what else?”
Hitsugaya, feeling slightly unnerved under that playful gaze, looked away from Killua purposefully. “I have special powers that allow me to…” he trailed off, realizing too late that maybe Killua wasn’t one to use this argument against. “I uh… my sword has a name,” he recovered rather…lamely.
Killua merely arched a brow in response.
“Well. You can’t touch me… I’m incorpor… ARGH!”
Hitsugaya Toushirou, tenth division captain and rare wielder of an elemental sword spirit, the type of which was said to come along only once in very many millennia, jumped and gave a startled yelp as he felt his behind smacked rather solidly.
“What the hell are you doing?!” he demanded, cheeks slightly pink as he whirled on the giggling Killua and glared scathingly at the other white-haired youth.
“Touching you,” Killua responded simply, folding his hands behind his head and obviously enjoying Toushirou’s embarrassment immensely. “Very solid, by the way.”
So it seemed that Killua had the ability to concentrate his reiatsu enough to overcome the differences in corporeality attained by shinigami when in realms outside of their own.
That meant…
Killua flash stepped again without warning and Toushirou lost his train of thought for the second time today upon seeing the motion, his reaction to jump backwards hastily when he felt a hand on his face. Startled, he instinctively assumed a battle-ready position with his hand on Hyourinmaru’s hilt.
Killua smiled and held up the hand that had stroked the side of Hitsugaya’s lip, and with a rather arrogant perusal of whatever it was he’d found, popped his index finger into his mouth. “Hmm…chocolate.”
Toushirou gaped. “What the hell…”
“You ate earlier. I saw the crumbs on the side of your face,” Killua offered simply. “Chocolate. Something… not sure what.”
“That’s disgusting!” Hitsugaya protested, scandalized.
“I’m a Hunter,” Killua stated by way of explanation. “I’m…hunting, I guess.”
Toushirou didn’t like being likened to prey.
“Look you insolent human child…”
“You ate earlier,” Killua reiterated calmly, unresponsive to Toushirou’s anger as he eyed the tenth division captain much as a wolf might eye a larger animal it hoped to eventually bring down with the right amount of cunning and luck. “So you do need to eat.”
“Well, yes but…”
“All animals need to eat… especially humans, ne?”
The shinigami clenched his fist at the insinuation. “I’m telling you, I’m not… ARGH WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING NOW?!”
Killua danced backwards as Toushirou swung out with his fist, pulling his hands away from where he’d placed them on either side of the captain’s face during his last flash step, withdrawing silently as the force of Hitsugaya’s reiatsu ripped the front of his outside shirt open.
“Bags under your eyes,” Killua noted by way of easy explanation. “Been busy lately? Not getting enough sleep, death god-san?”
Well yes, but that wasn’t any of the other boy’s business as far as Toushirou was concerned. Taking over all of the fifth division’s duties on top of his own was almost impossible and…
Wait.
“What are you trying to say, exactly?”
“You need to eat. And now, sleep? Another thing we have in common, death god-san!”
“That doesn’t mean we’re the same,” Hitsugaya responded with a furrowed brow, obviously on edge in anticipation of Killua’s next outlandish move.
However, no amount of anticipation in the world could have prepared him for what Killua did next.
Because when he felt Killua’s hand suddenly down…cupping…
Well, he was too shocked to even shout properly that time.
“Huh… all the right equipment, I think,” Killua mused with a calmness that almost, almost led Hitsugaya to believe that he was merely imagining the hand pressed up against his crotch.
Almost.
Except every time he breathed it reminded him that it was really there.
The hand on his crotch.
He lashed out with a fist.
The intent of the punch wasn’t to hit Killua, though that would have been an added bonus, but the immediate concern of the tenth division captain was to get the hand to go away.
And as Killua moved to dodge the attack, Hitsugaya was certain that the hand would be gone with him.
But then it wasn’t.
Apparently, Killua was a flexible little bastard on top of everything else.
“Maaa… why so embarrassed, death god-san? This kind of thing, it’s only natural, eh?”
“I’m telling you, I’m not…”
“Eat, sleep, and just this one more thing, I think…is all we’ll really need now, to determine that you’re the same kind of animal like the rest of us, ne?”
Hitsugaya’s eyes widened at the implications. “Eat…sleep… and what?”
Killua laughed and he wriggled his fingers just a little. “You’ll see.”
In the end, Toushirou ended up using all three days of his allotted time away. Plus a little extra, if one wanted to be exact.
And upon his return, he immediately and wordlessly retired to his quarters, reiatsu pouring out of him in angry waves as he walked, purposefully ignoring any underlings that might have had the misfortune of being between him and his goal of the moment. As he stepped into the door of his office, his only statement for the entire day in regards to how the mission went was a barely coherently growled, “Make a note, Matsumoto. I concede to eat and sleep as necessary, but I absolutely, absolutely refuse to take part in this vile thing called reproduction ever again.”
And then he had slammed the door in her face, leaving her too surprised to say anything but an automatic, “Yes sir!” as he did.
She stared at his closed door for a beat, wondering what had gotten his panties in a twist today. And honestly, wasn’t it a little early for a kid like him to denounce having sex ever again just because…
Waitaminute.
“Again?”
END
I don't even want edits with this. I couldn't even go back and LOOK at any of it myself. o.o
(ie the whole thing is a big mistake? *shrug*)
*runs away from Toushirou fangirls and hides*
AND I'M GOING TO HELL FOR IT.
Remember JaB, you're not allowed to read til you've read/watched HxH! I MEAN IT.
But at least this means one of my BILLION request fics is out of the way, as much as I'm GOING TO HELL for it.
WHY SUCH CRACKY REQUESTS? WHY?!
^^;;
Title: The Human Animal
Author: Celeste
Universe: Bleach, HunterxHunter
Theme/Topic: KilluaxHistugaya kiddie pron.
Rating: PG-15 (or more, depending on how you feel about oh, KIDDIE PRON).
Pairing: KilluaxHitsugaya
Spoilers: Through Bleach 187, no large HxH ones. Also, HUGE OOC warnings because HOW ELSE WAS I SUPPOSED TO MAKE THIS WORK?!
Word Count: 2,981
Time: A BILLION YEARS.
Summary: I’m going to hell. I’m going to hell, I’m going to hell, I’m going to hellhellhell.
Dedication: Ann’s fic request from me from A BILLION YEARS AGO and yeah, I haven’t gotten around to it ‘til just now. SORRY!
A/N: So the request was HistugayaxKillua PRON because Ann wanted to outdo JaB on the cracky requests. This is not a competition people! Think of us poor writers! *tears* But anyway, this is highly unlikely and highly OOC because OBVIOUSLY Hitsugaya wouldn’t be so damn EASY, but my only explanation is that Killua is OMG SO COOL. Seriously. That’s it. My whole explanation. Anyway, Ann’s request was, “Hitsugaya meets Killua and porn ensues: KILLUA MUST WIN.” So yeah. Here goes nothing. Shield your eyes, kids.
Distribution: Just lemme know.
Disclaimer: Not mine. Thankfully, in this case.
Tenth division captain Histugaya Toushirou stepped into one of the human realms currently within his jurisdiction with a look of obvious disdain, finding himself in a heavily wooded area in some undisclosed section of the dimension.
All that he knew was that this was the area in which two of his men had supposedly disappeared from and intelligence reports suggested that the lower ranking shinigami had been devoured by a particularly powerful Hollow that had staked its territory in these parts.
The young captain wasn’t particularly worried so much as annoyed, a Hollow that could take out a tenth chair was, ultimately, no big problem when it came to the pecking order of seireitei.
However, one that could kill a sixth chair was by protocol dictates, automatically labeled a serious threat and not wanting to take any chances after the fiasco with Aizen and the ryoka, orders had come in stating that Hitsugaya was to take care of the problem himself, as the area in question was under his team’s command.
Which was why he was here, and unhappy about it. Matsumoto could have undoubtedly taken care of the beast herself, but after the deaths of two squad-members, it seemed that Toushirou was obligated to deliver the killing blow…something about ceremony and due appearances expected of a captain-class shinigami.
He didn’t particularly think vengeance taken for show did anyone any good, but he wasn’t in charge like those shitty old men were. What he considered important was eliminating the threat in the most expedient manner possible, and that would have meant sending either Matsumoto or his third chair here while he remained in Soul Society to finish filing his reports concerning the Aizen incident such that the court could wash its hands of that foul memory and begin to rebuild.
Plus, he didn’t want to be here in the first place. He had never really liked the smell of the human world himself, but that wasn’t really an official type reason to abhor his current mission and thus, not worthy of mention.
Instead, the tenth division captain set about Hollow hunting, planning on getting everything squared away within the next few hours so he could return ahead of schedule.
Opting not to use the phone-device given to him by the Research and Technology Institute just prior to his departure as a Hollow that supposedly strong would be detectable from great distances without the use of such a thing, Toushirou closed his eyes and instead, began thinning and extending the perimeter of his reiatsu.
After reaching several kilometers in diameter, he concluded that his current territory included nothing but animals- some woodland ones and even fewer human ones as far as he could tell.
No Hollow within his immediate vicinity.
Making note, he moved towards the area in which he’d sensed human beasts, assuming that if a Hollow was to grow hungry, his best bed would be in that direction.
Several uneventful hours passed as he swept the miles surrounding the target coordinates given to him in his mission report, and he was beginning to think that the reports were false and that his two seats had deserted.
Stopping in another uninhabited forest area, the young captain paused for a rest beside a trickling stream in order to rethink his searching strategy, as his current one was proving fruitless.
Granted, his mission statement allotted three days in which he had to accomplish his task, but if possible, he would have liked to do it in one and return to seireitei as soon as possible.
Digging into his pocket for a food ration that Matsumoto had prepared for him upon his departure, he tore it from its package and noted with some distaste, that it was chocolate flavored. Sighing, he bit into it anyway and wondered to himself if the outlaw Hollow hadn’t already left the area after killing two shinigami, doubtless wary of the fact that more and more death gods would come for it the longer its fatality list grew.
It was a very likely scenario if the Hollow was more intelligent than a dog, and Toushirou, standing after his meal was finished, decided that that was strong enough a point to radio back to Soul Society with in the hopes of getting clearance to return until more intelligence could be gathered.
And he would have gone through with it too, except the distinct roar of a Hollow suddenly thundered in his ears, breaking his train of thought as he felt an accompanying burst of power that could only mean…
“Menos,” he muttered, grabbing Hyourinmaru’s hilt and dashing off in the direction of the disturbance.
~~~~~
Getting a read on the situation, he cursed when he sensed not just one overwhelming murderous aura, but two.
That would explain the easy deaths of two of his subordinates. Two Menos working in tandem to surprise any shinigami with a rank lower than third chair was infinitely possible, and scowling, the tenth division captain carefully cloaked his own reiatsu as he attempted to read the levels of his soon-to-be opponents.
It was strange… he could very distinctly pick out the lower-leveled Menos’ dark energy, but as he probed for information regarding the second of the two, the reiatsu shifted, morphing under the almost imperceptible touch of his own, growing sometimes, fading sometimes, almost playfully teasing his.
He didn’t like being teased.
Moments later he had a confirmed visual of the lower-level threat, and drawing his sword, prepared to attack from a distance before moving in to search for the second energy source. However, just as he was about to unleash his shikai, he watched, wide-eyed, as the Menos stumbled and fell over, enveloped in a strange purple glow and yowling disconsolately.
Too surprised to think properly, Toushirou found himself dashing forward to meet the writhing Hollow, only to watch in disbelief, as a boy who looked no older than Toushirou himself danced out of the Menos’ clawing hands and delivered a fierce kick to its mask, creating a crack in the thick white shell.
The beast roared in agony and prepared to lash out with its strongest beam attack while the boy, making note of the crack, performed what looked to be several hundred flash steps out of the way of the deadly energy bomb, landing lithely on the Menos’ long pointed nose.
Hitsugaya until that moment, had never before seen a Menos’ mask ripped off by way of gripping its empty eye sockets and…pulling.
The mask shattered in half as the upper portion was pulled clean off, the boy-warrior lifting it effortlessly between two hands and swinging it around to collide with the remaining bottom half, shattering both into a thousand pieces on impact.
The Menos dissolved with one last, plaintive cry.
“Aaah, that one was the most troublesome one yet!” the boy exclaimed, only sounding slightly out of breath as he wiped his hands off on the back of his pants. “Have you ever heard a monster so loud?” he asked then, turning to Hitsugaya like he knew he’d been there the entire time and smiling. “Yo.”
Toushirou’s eyes narrowed as he instinctively went on the defensive. The young boy before him was obviously a threat, but more information was required before Hitsugaya could know for sure, the level of danger the child presented. “You. Who are you? Are you human?” he demanded gruffly, reaching out with his reiatsu again to test the boy’s responses.
At the question, the other white-haired kid merely blinked back at the shinigami. “The last time I checked, I was” he replied simply, giving the young shinigami a look that for some reason, ended up pissing him off a little bit. “Why, aren’t you?”
Histugaya couldn’t help but feel insulted at the assumption. “Of course I’m not human. I’m a death god,” he announced imperiously.
The boy blinked again. “Eh? I’ve heard lots of guys say that they’re death gods. But after I beat them, they only end up being humans in the end,” the other white-haired boy said conversationally, putting his hands in his pockets and relaxing his pose.
Like he hadn’t just ripped the head off of a Gilan-class Menos with no visible weapons save for his own two hands.
He definitely couldn’t be human.
“I’ll ask you again,” Histugaya stated coolly, resting his hand on Hourinmaru’s hilt. “What are you?”
“Mmm…Killua, I guess,” the kid responded after a moment of thought. “Is that the answer you want?”
Histugaya blinked. “I’ve never heard of any race that calls itself “Killuas” before,” the young shinigami challenged, growing impatient with the child’s obtuseness.
“Well… I guess because there’s only me, really,” Killua replied with a shrug of one shoulder. “I’m Killua.”
Toushirou frowned. “You mean your name.”
“Yes, if that’s what you meant by your question.”
Hitsugaya was beginning to seriously dislike this Killua, whatever he was. But it was best to tread carefully as he didn’t yet know the true extent of the other boy’s power. “That’s not what I meant,” he reiterated, increasing the pressure of his reiatsu experimentally. “I want to know what you are. Mere humans cannot achieve the sort of power you have.”
Killua smiled. “Well, I guess I’m a Hunter too then. Is that okay?” he asked, sounding far too cheerful even in the presence of Hitsugaya’s probing reiatsu.
Anyone normal who had the percentage of spiritual pressure being put on them that Toushirou was currently putting on Killua would have been incapacitated by now. As it was, all Hitsugaya sensed was the boy’s own power holding up against his, not attacking back, but defending almost naturally.
“A…Hunter, is it?” Toushirou tested the word on his tongue and decided that it felt as foreign as the word “Killua” had. “You aren’t human after all then.”
“I’m just as human as you, I think,” Killua retorted, looking childishly put out by Toushirou’s declaration.
Toushirou smirked. “Don’t compare me to those kinds of animals,” he drawled. “I’m not the same at all.”
Killua’s eyebrow arched. “Ho? Above animals now huh? You sound human,” he pushed, accompanying his words with a slight push of his own power against the shinigami’s.
“I already told you. I’m a death god.”
“I see, I see.” Killua nodded, but the glint in his eyes told Toushirou that the so-called Hunter was only humoring him. “So, then death god-san, according to you, you’re better than us human animals, ne?”
“Of course. Which is why I’m here to tell you, whatever you are, not to kill either Menos or regular Hollows anymore. It’s outside of your jurisdiction as you are far too ill-equipped to deal with such monsters.”
Killua grinned. “Wooow, then I must have been really lucky just now!” he laughed, not looking off-put at all by Toushirou’s purposeful barbs. “So… those things are called Menos, eh? Or Hollows?”
“Tch, figures you wouldn’t know the difference,” Histugaya allowed with a snort. “Further proof that you have no business dealing with them.”
“Aaaa, but I’ve been killing those things for a long time now,” Killua began with a small pout. “They make a lot of noise and are rather dangerous if you let them do what they want. Isn’t it best if I just kill them when they come like that?”
“Mere humans are forbidden from engaging Hollows as a general rule,” Toushirou recited precisely. “Only those who wield zanpakutou can properly exorcise Hollow spirits to their rightful states.”
“And that would be you?”
“Yes.”
“Because you’re a…” Killua paused and smirked, “death god?”
Hitsugaya scowled. “Yes.”
“Mmmm…since you look so normal, death god-san… what makes you different from humans so I know next time, eh?”
Hitsugaya thought that should have been obvious. It wasn’t like shinigami were prancing around where everyone could see them all the time every day. “Well, my clothes obviously.”
Killua grinned slyly. “Eeh? So all I have to do is get the right outfit? Then can I be the same as death god-san?”
“Of course not.”
“Huh. Then it’s not just the clothes. Ne, what else, what else?”
Hitsugaya, feeling slightly unnerved under that playful gaze, looked away from Killua purposefully. “I have special powers that allow me to…” he trailed off, realizing too late that maybe Killua wasn’t one to use this argument against. “I uh… my sword has a name,” he recovered rather…lamely.
Killua merely arched a brow in response.
“Well. You can’t touch me… I’m incorpor… ARGH!”
Hitsugaya Toushirou, tenth division captain and rare wielder of an elemental sword spirit, the type of which was said to come along only once in very many millennia, jumped and gave a startled yelp as he felt his behind smacked rather solidly.
“What the hell are you doing?!” he demanded, cheeks slightly pink as he whirled on the giggling Killua and glared scathingly at the other white-haired youth.
“Touching you,” Killua responded simply, folding his hands behind his head and obviously enjoying Toushirou’s embarrassment immensely. “Very solid, by the way.”
So it seemed that Killua had the ability to concentrate his reiatsu enough to overcome the differences in corporeality attained by shinigami when in realms outside of their own.
That meant…
Killua flash stepped again without warning and Toushirou lost his train of thought for the second time today upon seeing the motion, his reaction to jump backwards hastily when he felt a hand on his face. Startled, he instinctively assumed a battle-ready position with his hand on Hyourinmaru’s hilt.
Killua smiled and held up the hand that had stroked the side of Hitsugaya’s lip, and with a rather arrogant perusal of whatever it was he’d found, popped his index finger into his mouth. “Hmm…chocolate.”
Toushirou gaped. “What the hell…”
“You ate earlier. I saw the crumbs on the side of your face,” Killua offered simply. “Chocolate. Something… not sure what.”
“That’s disgusting!” Hitsugaya protested, scandalized.
“I’m a Hunter,” Killua stated by way of explanation. “I’m…hunting, I guess.”
Toushirou didn’t like being likened to prey.
“Look you insolent human child…”
“You ate earlier,” Killua reiterated calmly, unresponsive to Toushirou’s anger as he eyed the tenth division captain much as a wolf might eye a larger animal it hoped to eventually bring down with the right amount of cunning and luck. “So you do need to eat.”
“Well, yes but…”
“All animals need to eat… especially humans, ne?”
The shinigami clenched his fist at the insinuation. “I’m telling you, I’m not… ARGH WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING NOW?!”
Killua danced backwards as Toushirou swung out with his fist, pulling his hands away from where he’d placed them on either side of the captain’s face during his last flash step, withdrawing silently as the force of Hitsugaya’s reiatsu ripped the front of his outside shirt open.
“Bags under your eyes,” Killua noted by way of easy explanation. “Been busy lately? Not getting enough sleep, death god-san?”
Well yes, but that wasn’t any of the other boy’s business as far as Toushirou was concerned. Taking over all of the fifth division’s duties on top of his own was almost impossible and…
Wait.
“What are you trying to say, exactly?”
“You need to eat. And now, sleep? Another thing we have in common, death god-san!”
“That doesn’t mean we’re the same,” Hitsugaya responded with a furrowed brow, obviously on edge in anticipation of Killua’s next outlandish move.
However, no amount of anticipation in the world could have prepared him for what Killua did next.
Because when he felt Killua’s hand suddenly down…cupping…
Well, he was too shocked to even shout properly that time.
“Huh… all the right equipment, I think,” Killua mused with a calmness that almost, almost led Hitsugaya to believe that he was merely imagining the hand pressed up against his crotch.
Almost.
Except every time he breathed it reminded him that it was really there.
The hand on his crotch.
He lashed out with a fist.
The intent of the punch wasn’t to hit Killua, though that would have been an added bonus, but the immediate concern of the tenth division captain was to get the hand to go away.
And as Killua moved to dodge the attack, Hitsugaya was certain that the hand would be gone with him.
But then it wasn’t.
Apparently, Killua was a flexible little bastard on top of everything else.
“Maaa… why so embarrassed, death god-san? This kind of thing, it’s only natural, eh?”
“I’m telling you, I’m not…”
“Eat, sleep, and just this one more thing, I think…is all we’ll really need now, to determine that you’re the same kind of animal like the rest of us, ne?”
Hitsugaya’s eyes widened at the implications. “Eat…sleep… and what?”
Killua laughed and he wriggled his fingers just a little. “You’ll see.”
In the end, Toushirou ended up using all three days of his allotted time away. Plus a little extra, if one wanted to be exact.
And upon his return, he immediately and wordlessly retired to his quarters, reiatsu pouring out of him in angry waves as he walked, purposefully ignoring any underlings that might have had the misfortune of being between him and his goal of the moment. As he stepped into the door of his office, his only statement for the entire day in regards to how the mission went was a barely coherently growled, “Make a note, Matsumoto. I concede to eat and sleep as necessary, but I absolutely, absolutely refuse to take part in this vile thing called reproduction ever again.”
And then he had slammed the door in her face, leaving her too surprised to say anything but an automatic, “Yes sir!” as he did.
She stared at his closed door for a beat, wondering what had gotten his panties in a twist today. And honestly, wasn’t it a little early for a kid like him to denounce having sex ever again just because…
Waitaminute.
“Again?”
END
I don't even want edits with this. I couldn't even go back and LOOK at any of it myself. o.o
(ie the whole thing is a big mistake? *shrug*)
*runs away from Toushirou fangirls and hides*