calling Dr.Jones!

[permogod]

I was reading the news online, and came across a story that was so off the wall, one could take it as a spoof. My first tthought was, "You've got to be joking! This is the kind of thing I'd expect to read in The Onion.

Fat lady trashes doc because he said she was obese and she would have more health problems if she didn't lose weight.*gasp

Comments

[slammerkinbabe]

First off, advising a woman on how her appearance affects her love life is not only borderline sexual harassment, it's completely subjective and not at all logically defensible. That's pretty clear evidence that this guy has some issues around weight that have nothing to do with health. He's a doctor, not a sex therapist

[permogod]

I conscede the point about love life, that was uncalled for. Although I have to say my mind went to thinking that maybe he was trying to make a point about her self esteem, and that the fact that a lot of people who overeat do so because of thier low self esteem, and if she lost weight she could build up her confidence. I don't know, maybe that was my thinking because that's happened with me

[slammerkinbabe]

Well, yeah. Like I said, the lawsuit is taking things way too far. I guess it just really pushed *my* buttons that he would presume to comment on people's love lives. I think we were reacting to different aspects of the article, basically. I see your point that hurtful issues still need to be addressed, but the love life comment kind of screamed fatphobia at me. It's something that I might not have reacted to quite so strongly a year or so ago, because I would have believed it was true, and though it would have made me feel like shit I would have figured "well, he's telling the truth". But my current girlfriend finds me much more attractive now, clinically overweight, than she would if I were thinner - she's told me so, and often enough that I know I can trust her. That's been huge for my self-esteem, and it's actually led to my eating better and becoming healthier - because the self-esteem has just been critical in getting myself to care enough, you know? It's much easier to work towards your own health when you feel like you

[permogod]

No worries

sex sells

[trancendenz]

I don't think it was over the top. It's not like he said no one would have sex with her. Maybe I misread the article, but it appeared that he just listed that as one of the side effects of being overweight.
THAT'S WHAT DOCTORS DO.

It's like if a doctor was to advise someone not to take steroids. One of the problems with taking steroids is that men can become impotent. Would you rather the doctor not list that, if maybe, just maybe, that was the side effect that would get you to re-evaluate what you are doing.

I don't think overweight people have less sex drive etc, but if she's upset or hurt she may not have a good sexual relationship with her partner.

This chick is just pissed to here *gasp* the truth.

Re: sex sells

[trancendenz]

*hear

[thereject]

Sometimes yelling at someone is the only way to get them to accept the horrible reality that they are on a self-destructive path. As you say, she undoubtedly knows she's unhealthy yet has done nothing about it. Pussy-footing around the issue or couching it in soft language only dims the message that if she doesn't get serious about losing weight then she needs to get form-fitted for a coffin.

He's a doctor, not a therapist. It's not his job to be sensitive to someone eating herself into the grave. It's his job to tell her she needs to cure her fork-in-mouth disease before she dies. As for affecting her love life: morbid obesity has a not-insignificant impact on sexual behavior. He was perfectly within his rights to mention it.

[slammerkinbabe]

Perfectly within his rights to mention it, yes, but yelling at her is simply not an effective way of going about it. See both my comments: building on the shame/guilt complex of people who are overweight is *far* more likely to make them gain weight than to help them lose it. People who are morbidly obese almost universally have issues with emotional overeating that are related to low self-esteem or just feeling crappy about their lives in general. I don't know what the doctor said to her or how he said it, exactly, but I do know that teling someone if they don't cut it out they're going to "need to get form-fitted for a coffin" is not going to snap them out of it, it's going to feel like verbal abuse and it's going to tailspin them into eating more and feeling worse