Revelations - A Hogwarts AU
Summery: AU. Dean becomes the victim of his own schemes, when a plan to help Sam and Jess to admit their true feelings backfires. He finds himself realizing he has feelings for his best friend. ~8.500 words
Warning: Cuteness and then some. I just wanted this to be so cute and cuddly that I'd make myself puke, because I was getting a little lost in all the angst lately. So here you go, nuzzle in.
A/N: For the purpose of this Fic, I've added two years to Sam's age. Also I've tried to keep names, houses and teachers as close to Lettie's Hogwarts art as I could.
Disclaimer: Don't own Supernatural or the Harry Potter Universe.
Dean looks at his History of Magic test, where a huge T is written in red ink across the first page. It doesn't really bother him as much as it should, he's sure he can convince Castiel to tutor him in time for the N.E.W.T's.
Across the Great Hall, at the Ravenclaw table, Jessica is annoyed with Sam again, her words snide, but the tone somewhat playful. The two are in that awkward pre-dating stage, as far as Dean can tell; he knows the body language and tone of voice from experience.
"You know, Sam. I honestly don't care." Jessica sighs, hands at her hips. "If you'd rather go to Hogsmeade with your friends, I'm not the one to stop you. You don't owe me any favours."
"Come on, Jess. Don't be like that. You're the one who said maybe, and I guess I just thought..." Sam bites his lip and Dean almost laughs at his brother's desperate expression, as Sam tries to pick his words. "I told my brother we'd go to Zonko's."
"Well you know what, Sam. That sounds like fun." Jessica has that look on her face, the "this is your cue"-face, and Dean knows it so well he's surprised Sam still doesn't recognize it. "I guess you can make out with your brother then, since you don't want me there!"
She spins on her heals and storms out of the Great Hall, which is a pretty damn good choice, Dean thinks, because if he wasn't in such a spirited Christmas mood he might just have a mind to get a tad upset about her last comment.
"She hates me now!" Sam slumps down on the bench across from Dean. "I've done it, and now she really hates me!"
"Do you, like, not know girls at all?" Dean asks, re-stocking his plate with pie. "I'm so sorry, Sammy. I've clearly failed as a big brother!"
When Sam just hangs his head, face wrecked, Dean takes pity on his brother.
"How come you got to be so smart and then not understand the most basic things in life?" Dean sighs and reaches across the table to pat Sam's shoulder. "She's crazy about you, Sammy. She's just waiting for you to work up the courage to admit you like her back."
Sam looks confused for a few seconds, and then he just sulk back in his seat. "I'm not sure girls are worth the trouble."
Dean rolls his eyes. "Honestly Sam. Are you even my flesh and blood?"
With an annoyed hiss Sam gets up and trots out of the Great Hall, his bag dragging after him on the floor.
His empty seat is soon after filled by Tessa, who sits down with that annoying understated air of knowledge that makes her a perfect Head Girl. "I've been appointed emissary." She announces calmly, and her left hand finds the Head Girl emblem next to her Hufflepuff badge.
Dean sighs. "Just give them a week, Du Mort. They'll work it out themselves."
"Look Dean, I really would. It's not like I enjoy sticking my nose in people's business, I really don't." She adds before Dean can interrupt with any sarcastic replies. "But I can't have two Prefects who can't work together, because of some little derailed puppy love."
"So what am I supposed to do about it? Just talk to them yourself." Dean can feel his patience running out. He really likes Tessa- even if most of the other students find her eeire- and he knows this isn't her idea. "Or maybe Mr. Head Boy himself should man up and stop sending you to do his dirty work. He's the one who cares, I know you don't."
"Rafael doesn't want to make a thing out of it." Tessa makes a face, like quoting Rafael's words gives her a bad taste in her mouth. "He doesn't want to send the signal that we're trying to control who the Prefects date."
"But in reality he'd love to control every little thing that goes on at this school." Dean points out. When Tessa doesn't even try to argue, Dean sighs and rubs his forehead. "Then what am I supposed to do about it?"
Tessa smiles, a small, patient smile. "You're a smart boy, Dean. You'll think of something." And then she's out of her seat, and Dean's watching her walk away just as the desert clears from the plates and the rest of his pie vanishes.
As a result, his mood is pretty bad at the time he looks up to see Castiel leaving the Hufflepuff table. He follows the boy with his eyes as the dark-haired boy makes his way out of the Great Hall. Castiel turns suddenly at the doors, his eyes finding Dean's at the Gryffindor table and a wide smile spreads across his face. Dean can't help it, he never can. He just smiles back to Castiel and suddenly he's in a lot better mood.
When Dean returns to his dormitory there's a single plate on his night stand, with a piece of apple pie and a note. "I have a plan." Castiel's neat handwriting says, and Dean smiles. If Castiel wasn't so damn loyal and kind and unselfish he would have made a great Ravenclaw with the brains like that. He never misses a damn thing.
…
Dean's in the library looking up smart things to copy into his Charms essay when Castiel finds him. The Hufflepuff slides a piece of parchment in on the pages Dean is reading. Dean looks up at him and then at the piece of parchment.
"This is a Love Potion." He says, letting his eyes wander down the list of ingredients.
Castiel hushes him and shakes his head, blue eyes wide. "A Revelations Potion." He corrects.
"I don't know, Cas. Isn't that a bit, I don't know… Unethical?" Dean frowns and looks up at Castiel. "I mean, I'm all for it, but it's not like you."
"It doesn't fabricate love, Dean. That would be unethical. This makes you realize your feelings and gives you the desire to express them." Castiel explains, and there's something in the expression on his face that Dean, master of reading the people around him, can't interpret. Castiel just continue. "They really just need a little push, right?"
"Sam would be so pissed." Dean deadpans.
"Sure he would. If he found out. But he won't." Castiel says and continues. "Gabriel gave it to me, but it's no easy Potion, Dean. It's really advanced, and we'll probably need Professor Du Mort's dungeon."
"Tessa is gonna love that, us messing around in her dad's dungeon." Dean picked at a lose thread in his robes. "Who do we know who's good at Potions? I mean, besides Sam."
"I'm not half bad."
"This is my baby brother's love life, Cas. I need better than `Not half bad´."
"I got an O on my last test." Castiel says unsure.
Dean suddenly feels the urge to laugh. Of cause the little brainy nerd knows potions. How could he ever have doubted that?
Just then Castiel's eyes catch something behind them and he reaches over and takes the parchment from Dean's hands, shoving it back in his bag, trying to look innocent just as Sam reaches them.
"I really don't understand why you go through all of this with the girls you date, Dean. Is it really worth it?" Sam askes, looking absolutely miserable.
"Dude. Girls. Boobs." Dean explains, and when Sam still doesn't seem to get it he adds, "If you like someone, you like them and then they're always worth the trouble - trust me." Dean looks to Castiel for back-up, but what he finds is Cas, staring at Dean like he just spoke his first words ever, or maybe just the first ones to make sense.
…
Dean makes his way down to the Great Hall the next morning, running into Tessa as she is leaving.
"Did you talk to them?" She asks without looking at Dean, the whole thing very hush-hush and conspiratorial.
"No, but I'm handling it." Dean whispers and moves a stack of pancakes to his plate with a wave of the wand.
"You better handle it, Dean. Because we don't want Rafael to think he has to." She whispers back.
"I said, I'm handling it." Dean repeats as Tessa is joined by her friend Kali and the two girls disapperes into the crowd of students comming and going.
Castiel is in her abandoned seat before Dean can even take the first bite of his pancakes.
"Well, I've talked to Peeves." Castiel announces, making Dean choke on his mouthful. Castiel just frowns. "You should take smaller bites." And continues. "He was reluctant to assist, you know Professor Du Mort is the only one on the school he really respects."
Dean manages to swallow the pancakes. "What are we using Peeves for again?"
"Distraction, Dean. We can't just waltz into Professor Du Mort's dungeon and expect him to have the day off." Castiel says without missing a beat. Dean isn't sure what has gotten into Castiel, but he kinda likes it.
Castiel and Peeves set the plan in motion right after dinner. After a sign form Castiel Peeves comes swooping down on Professor Zachariah, yelling swear words and chucking Dung Bombs at him once in a while.
Castiel tells Dean that Peeves has planned to knock over the statue of Salvador the Bold after about half an hour and then he will proceed down to the kitchens, where he will play catch-the-House-Elf with himself, which should keep the teachers occupied for at least two hours.
…
After Castiel has added the Dogwood Slug Slime and then stops Dean from adding the Nettle Root before the Adders Fork, the Hufflepuff proclaims that the Revelation Potion now has the right pink colour. "Now it just needs one hair from the maker." Castiel says, pulling out one of Dean's hairs and dropping it into the bubbling potion.
"It'll bind the potion," Castiel explains, ignoring Dean's disgruntled expression.
"So do you have any smart plan on how we're going to get them to drink it?" Dean wonders out loud, peering down at the pink goo over Castiel's shoulder.
"Oh well, it's quite simple really. We're going to do it during the Yule dinner. There will be fewer students, and it will be easy to slip a few splashes of Potion into - say, their cherry-yogurt milkshakes."
"I knew there was a reason why I let you hang around me, Novak." Dean teases and slips an arm around Castiel's shoulder. Castiel ducks away and slaps at Dean's arm with a wide smile.
…
The Christmas holidays swoops around before they know it and both Sam and Jess has consented in staying at Hogwarts over the holidays, Castiel having gone through various, discrete channels to convince Jessica's friend Ava to persuade Jessica to stay. Dean meets up with Sam at the Yule dinner and the two brothers find their seats, close to the pie (Dean's choice) and opposite Jessica and Ava (Sam's choice).
Dean watches as Sam pathetically sends Jessica hopeful glances, but it's clear that the girl is ignoring Sam and it's a strategy Dean knows well and if he was in Sam's place he would know how to counter her determined silence, but Sam doesn't seem to have a clue how to handle the situation.
Castiel drops down on the bench on Jessica's other side ten minutes late, starting up an awkward conversation about Hippogriffs' mating rituals. Jessica and Ava stares confused at the dark-haired Hufflepuff, and Dean is laughing so hard he almost spills his pumpkin juice.
Throughout the meal Dean regrets the whole plan twice, finally deciding halfway through desert to go through with it anyway (just around the time Jessica, a little too loud and enthusiastic, begins to talk about how she's considering going to Hogsmeade with the Slytherin Prefect Virgil next time, because apparently he has asked so many times now), and signals Castiel before he can change his mind again. Seconds later an outsized bull frog appears in Meg Master's lemon pudding five seats down the table, making the group of Slytherin girls scream and jump/tumble/plunge out of their seats. Dean and Castiel take advantage of the decoy to uncork their hip flashes and add the right amount of Revelations Potion into Jessica's and Sam's Cherry-Yogurt milkshakes, and then resume eating their pie with innocent faces.
Dean tries to wait for Sam and Jessica to show any interest in their Milkshakes, but in the end he has to admit that he just isn't a patient man.
"Well, I think we should all toast to the Christmas spirit and the wonders of presents." Dean lifts his own milkshake, waiting for Castiel to mimic him across the table, and then, hesitantly, Sam, Jessica and most of the people in earshot (except Meg and her Slyhterin-possy) join in as well.
Sam happily drinks down half his milkshake and then watch as Dean does the same. Judging by the way Castiel's eyes go wide when he lowers his own milkshake and then - if possible -even wider as he looks across the table at the milkshake Dean is holding, he has figured out that something is terribly wrong, long before Dean's brain gets to the same conclusion.
By the time Sam turns his full attention to his brother, arms crossed, bitch-face found, Castiel is already getting out of his seat. Jessica, however, forces him back down with a flick of her wand.
"So, this is your best chance to tell me what you put in my milkshake, Dean." Sam says. "Because, well… I'm sure it will help lift everyone's Christmas spirit."
Dean slowly opens his mouth to let the mouthful of pink liquid slosh back in the glass. But the damage is done. Dean can already feel the tingle, the warm bubbles, the blurry happy sensation. But it's not until he looks across the table and into Castiel's wide, blue eyes that he realize just how much the plan has backfired on him.
Dean gets up, not realizing that everyone at the table is watching him closely. He tries to tell himself that the fluttering feeling in his stomach is a result of too much pie, but really, one can never have too much pie.
With great determination Dean avoid Castiel's eyes as he exits the Great Hall, leaving behind a couple of dozen surprised and curious heads, with eyes that follows him as he disappears.
"Sonuvabitch!" Dean hisses as he reaches the top of the marble staircase. He is panting slightly from running up the stairs, and he backs up against the wall, hands on his knees, dropping to the floor. "Sonuvabitch!" he repeats, covering his face with his hands.
Dean doesn't know why the potion even has an effect on him. It wasn't a real Love Potion, it was a Revelations Potion with a twist towards emotions. It's supposed to awaken latent feelings, make you aware, give you the desire to act on it. But if Dean's stomach is reacting, his chest too, his whole body in fact, just at the thought of Castiel's big blue eyes staring back at him, it can only mean that there's a few latent issues Dean had no clue was even in him.
He hears footsteps running up the stairs and lifts his head to see Jess and Sam come up the steps. They stop when they catch sight of Dean sitting hunched against the wall. Jess hangs back as Sam steps closer, but Dean sees that they drop each other's hands as they move apart. "Dean, it's okay. It's just a stupid Love Potion. We'll just make an antidote."
Dean looks over at his brother and sees an out. No one but him and Cas know what the potion was really supposed to do, and apparently Castiel hasn't felt the need to correct Sam's assumption that it was a Love Potion. Dean doesn't understand why Cas didn't, but he's happy about it at any rate. Perhaps Castiel knows Dean better than Dean knows himself, guessing at the effect it would have on Dean, wanting to give Dean this opportunity. It makes Dean a little uncomfortable, the thought that Castiel had understood what the potion would reveal in Dean, but he can't think about that now, can't think about what Castiel have or have not guessed about Dean.
Because the fun part hasn't even begun yet. "We can't just make an antidote. Some of the ingredients are rare. We used all the Molasses of Fire Slug Castiel had managed to get his hands on."
Sam doesn't seem to let this fact throw him. "We'll get some by owl, no biggy."
"That'll take days!" Dean exclaims and then squirms at how much that sounded like a whine.
"Well, then that will be days in where you can consider the mistake in trying to force a Love Potion on your brother!" Sam says rather harshly and Dean can't blame him; if he thought someone had tried to trick him with fake feelings he would be so pissed. But he doesn't want to tell Sam the truth, and he's not even sure the truth would make it better. Dean is beginning to doubt the morality behind a Revelations Potion. It doesn't feel too good to be in the receiving end off, at least.
Downstairs chairs are scraping against the floor, and happy Gryffindor voices can be heard coming towards them.
"We need to get back to our Tower," Sam says, looking unsure whether it's safe to leave Dean alone in this state.
Dean just nods, but reaches out to catch Sam's sleeve as his brother takes Jessica's hand and turns to leave. "Hey, I'm really sorry about, well things. But are you two okay?"
Jessica sends Dean a flashing white smile. "I think you got the point through, even if it wasn't exactly the way you planned."
"Well if you two crazy kids can work things out on your own, it's for the best." Dean tries to sound nonchalant, but Sam knows his brother. And the crease in his forehead deepens.
"You know, Cas ran back to the Huffelpuff Common Room right after you left. I'm sure he feels as weird as you do. You should talk to him."
"Yeah, Sam. Of cause I should go talk face to face with him when we're magically in love!" Dean lies smoothly, sticking to his story. "What an epically bad idea."
But there's truth in it, Dean thinks. It would be a bad idea to go see Castiel now. In fact Dean's not sure he can face Cas at all, ever. At least not until he figures out what the hell is going on in his head.
Sam shrugs and takes Jessica's hand again and the two leave Dean alone on the stairs, Sam sending him one last concerned look as they walk out of sight behind a statue.
…
Dean refuses to come down for any of the meals the next day, no matter how hard Jo and Pam try to force him. Dean wonders vaguely why most of his friends are girls, what that says about him. Perhaps he really should have seen this coming, most of the tell-tail sighs are there if you know to look for them. He and Cas has been close friends since they met, their friendship has always been easy, comfortable. Dean doesn't think he ever really fell in love with Cas, in fact he's pretty sure he didn't, because he would have noticed that at least. They were just always close, like if the one was in trouble, the other automatically were too, and if one was sick, the other would pretend to be sick as well and then sneak over to the other boy's dormitory to be moral support. It was easy with Cas. And Dean knows he loves Cas, he just though he loved him like he loves Sam, like he loves pie. He never thought about having sex with Cas, although the thought doesn't seem too horrible right now, Dean thinks. He mentally slaps himself, shaking his head.
Dean can only assume Castiel has somehow figured out how Dean felt about him. Perhaps he just ignored it, hoping Dean would never act on it. But even if Castiel knows, even if he can look past it and accept Dean's feelings, there is no way Dean can face the other boy, not yet. So he stays in bed, hoping that he won't ever have to come out of the dormitory.
Already around dinner time the first day, however, the loneliness becomes boring. He tries to sleep, but when he falls asleep he dreams of Castiel, waking up with a hard cock, covered in sweat. He credits years of building up stamina for the fact that sweat is all he's covered in, and gets up to shower.
…
Castiel doesn't know how to argue Rachel's attempts to convince her fellow Hufflepuff to come down for meals. After all the Great Hall is still rather empty, thanks to the holidays. And even though very few people were actually involved in the potion accident, the rumour seem to have spread all around the school, and of cause Dean's Gryffindor friends know all about it, and gently tells Castiel at breakfast that Dean won't be down for meals. So going to get food isn't much of a trial, yet.
Because no one really know the true truth. Dean, being a true friend, must have kept the lie going, but Castiel doesn't know any more than that, because he refuses to listen to any conversation involving Dean's name being spoken. Castiel is just happy that everyone seem to think it's just a simple Love Potion accident, because he doesn't want to have to explain to any of them why he's suddenly flushed when they talk about Dean, why he's unfocused and oblivious to the world around him like a fool in love. Because he is all those things, but it's nice to pretend it's fake, and everyone is so nice to him, and he soaks it in, knowing that he's probably lost his best friend.
Because obviously Dean is refusing to see Castiel, now that he knows, now that he saw. Castiel feels so ashamed, not at what he's feeling, he has come to terms with that side of himself long ago, but Dean deserved the truth, he deserved at least the chance to react to his friend being in love with him, and Castiel was too chicken to give him that option, afraid Dean would get awkward and then draw out of their friendship. Castiel has been hiding all his feelings away for years and now Dean knows, he couldn't have missed it even if he was blind. Castiel gets up from the table, and a few students follow him with their eyes as he goes, but they all just smile comforting at him. At least for a while he's still safe, until someone figures it all out. This is Hogwarts and - more importantly - this is Castiel's life. There is no way that noone will figure it out at some point.
…
Sam stops by the next day after breakfast and brings Dean a plate of food. He hangs around most of the day and they show each other their presents and eat so much candy that Sam literally get sick. That doesn't stop him from sometimes start humming "Dean and Castiel, sitting in a tree…", and Dean will throw a pillow in his face.
Jo and Pam drops in on them right after lunch, which Dean finds to be quite well-timed as he is running out of pillows to throw after Sam and they all end up down in the Common Room, in each their huge armchair, wrapped in quilts Jo mother made for them, roasting marshmallows in the fireplace.
Sam is reading some of Dean's school books, while Dean and Jo get into a heated game of Wizard Chess and Pam leys stretched out on the floor, her cat, Demon, purring away on the curve of her back. All in all it's a pretty perfect day. The only thing nagging Dean is the fact that Castiel isn't there, as he would usually be, pointing out flaws in Dean's chess moves, stuffing himself with too-burned marshmallows and sitting on the floor, at Dean's feet, cuddling back against Dean's knees in his own new Harvelle-quilt.
Dean closes his eyes. It had always been so easy and pleasant, he had never thought that the warm feeling he would get in his chest when Cas cuddled against him were anything other than contentment, that the tingle he would get in his stomach when Castiel would smile when he pulled marshmallows off his stick, drawing out long strings of melted white goo, was anything else than happiness.
Love. Dean really hadn't seen it coming. But now that it is here, it doesn't freak him out at all. Because it just fits. The way Castiel's back fits against his knees. Dean wonders if he can go back to pretending that he doesn't feel these things. Surely he can if it means he will get to keep Cas. He just isn't sure Cas will let him.
"I wonder what Cas is doing. I miss him." The words leave his mouth completely without permission, but he doesn't regret them enough to wish he could take them back.
"He left this morning for the Forrest." Pam says, not lifting her head from her arms.
Jo's the one who look up from the chess board and notices Dean's frighten expression. "He went to help Anna, Gwen and Rachel with their Hippogriff-project, gees could you look more like a five-year-old girl who spotted a spider? He's not suicidal just because he's in love with you, Dean."
Dean wondered for a second if there were something in those words that he ought to consider the meaning of, when Sam suddenly interrupted them, a confused look on his face. "Dean what is this?"
Sam holds up the parchment, a piece with Castiel's neat handwriting scribbled across it. For a second Dean is confused, then he notice the book Sam is holding, the potions book Dean left the ingredients list for the Revelations Potions in.
"Put that back, Sammy." He warns, but Sam is already reading it.
"This isn't even…" Sam starts, but Dean is capable with silent body bind spells and Sam doesn't get the chance to finish the sentence.
"Dean, it's your turn." Jo says, and Dean turns to find that neither Jo nor Pam seems to have noticed the Winchester brother's exchange of words(and in Dean's case, spells). Dean moves a pawn quickly, not really caring about the game anymore. He turns back to Sam, signalling with his hands that Sam will be in the receiving end of so many ass whoopings if he doesn't keep his mouth shut about it. Sam, of cause, can't reply, but Dean knows Sam will behave. They are brothers after all.
Dean lets Sam go and the younger Winchester does a full body quiver, as if being stunned is something he has to shake off. Dean snatches the parchment from his brother's hands, but he knows it's pointless. Sam is too smart for his own good, and all Dean can do now is to smooth things over.
He gets up, letting the quilt drop back in his chair. "Sam did you see what Dad sent me? Come on I'll show you." Dean stares pointedly at his brother until Sam gets up and follows him to the stairs leading to the seventh year boy's dormitory. Jo and Pam look after them as they leave, but luckily they don't seem to notice anything being off. Dean thanks his lucky star for this, because if Jo and Pam were to get a whiff of someone being up to something they wouldn't let it rest, not for anything.
Dean closes the door behind Sam and turns to face him, drawing a deep breath. Nervously his eyes rise to meet Sam's, but to his surprise his brother is just smirking at him. "Seriously? A Revelations Potion? Seriously?"
"Look, Sammy. This isn't what…" Dean starts, hands raised to calm Sam down. But Sam interrupts him.
"It took a Revelations Potion for you to figure out you're in love with Cas? Seriously?"
The words echo in the dormitory for almost a full minute, or so it seems to Dean, before Dean manages to grab any thought from his head and turn it into words. "Am I the only one who had no frigging idea?"
Sam raises his eyebrow, smirk growing into a smile. "I think there might be a few first year Slytherins. And I guess, Cas. I mean even if he had known I doubt he would have had the guts to do anything about it."
"What are you talking about? Cas knew, he was the one who spread the Love Potion lie to protect me."
"To protect you? Oh. Oh. So I guess that explains why you're both avoiding each other."
Dean feels like yelling. He hates when Sam understands things faster than him, because Dean isn't stupid, there's just things he doesn't see. "What are you talking about?"
"I'm talking about the fact that apparently you're both clueless." Sam turns to leave and even though he wants to, Dean doesn't stop him. Because he really wants his brother to explain this little epiphany he apparently had, but at the same time Dean doesn't want to be around Sam right now, with his damn smug smile and his crossed arms and his superior Iknowsomethingyoudon'tknow-attitude, so Dean lets his brother leave, adamant that he can figure Sam's hints and clues out himself.
…
Dean has the horrible feeling he's missing something, some vital piece of information that's been handed to him, that he forgot to pay attention to. He walks down to breakfast the next morning for the first time in days, docking in behind Jo and Pam, who works as a great shield against curious eyes.
Then suddenly Jo's words from earlier come back to Dean, something she said when they were sitting in the Common Room.
"He's not suicidal just because he's in love with you, Dean."
Cas was in love with Dean. Cas had told people it was a Love Potion to protect himself, not Dean. Cas had been avoiding Dean because the stupid Hufflepuff with the annoyingly blue eyes was afraid his love for Dean would be revealed if they were to meet. It all makes sense, and somehow Dean can't blame Sam for accusing Dean of being a bit slow in the uptake, because it is so damn obvious. And how had Dean not seen it before? How could he have ignored not only his own feelings but Castiel's as well?
No wonder Castiel had been avoiding Dean if he thought Dean wouldn't want him. After all, anyone who could ignore something so obvious must be doing it on purpose. Castiel must have thought Dean knew how Castiel felt and had just been trying to pretend it wasn't true to protect their friendship.
Dean mentally slaps himself for the second time that week, considering with a fragment of his consciousness if it even works, because he keeps fucking up anyway. But most of his brain is revolving around Castiel and every little thing they ever did together, all the little moments of near cuddling, that were completely allowed between two boys who were friends, but perhaps it always crossed the line, just a little, just enough for everyone else to notice, even if they didn't notice themselves. Or at least Dean hadn't notice. Castiel would have, Dean supposes, and that just makes him wonder why Castiel never tried to push it just that one step further.
In the end Dean knows there is only one way to get the answers he needs, and that's how he finds himself changing directions, leaving The Great Hall and returning to the Entrance Hall. He slips his way unnoticed down the long staircase going to the kitchens, luckily not running into anyone, stopping at the painting that he knows hides the entrance to the Hufflepuff Common Room.
He's been in here so many times and he knows it almost as well as he knows his own Common Room. He remember cramming for his O.W.L's here, back to back with Cas, reading each their old, dusty text book, reading important lines out loud when they came across them. He remembers sneaking in here one night on their third year when Castiel had the chickenpox, crawling in to bed with the other boy, but keeping his distance because of Castiel's fever.
He even remember this one time, when they had snuck in a bottle of fire whiskey and they … well, it was fun anyway and that fourth year only had antlers for a week or so.
Dean is not surprised to find the Seventh Year Boy's Dormitory empty. He spotted Andy in the Great Hall and the rest of the boys, besides Castiel is home for the holidays and he already knew Castiel is outside on the grounds, helping his dad to get the Hippogriffs to mate. Dean doesn't even know how that's comming along. Castiel used to talk so much about it, true exitement in his voice. Dean hasn't spoken to Cas since before the Yule Dinner. God, he misses him, and he's not even afraid to admit it. But of cause that might be the Potion doing its job, making him want to admit to the world that he's crazy in love with his best friend.
Dean walks over to Castiel's bed. It's neatly made, a new black and yellow Harvelle quilt thrown across the bedspreads. Dean sits down on the bed, sinks into the soft madras. It's softer than his own - too soft for his taste, but Castiel likes it this way, he likes to be able to snuggle down in his bed, and that image makes Dean smile. He lays back and closes his eyes, stretch out an arm and dig his fingers into the bedcovers where Cas should have been. Should be. Here, next to Dean where he belongs. Dean's not sure what he's going to do now. Maybe wait. Maybe just lie here until Castiel comes back and then see what happens when they are finally face to face. What Dean doesn't plan is to fall asleep.
…
"There is nothing to fear, Mr Novak. Just a few drops of Dittany will do the trick." Madam Pomfrey tells him, examining the open wound on Castiel's arm where the Hippogriff decided to leave it's disapproval mark.
Castiel likes Madam Pomfrey, especially the way she never asks what happened. Running around with Dean you learn to appreciate those little things, because it's always best if no one knows how he got his split lip, or his broken wrist or bat wings emerging from his back.
"Just give it a few minutes and you'll be fine. Then you can return to your Dormitory. I'll let your Head of House know you'll be late for curfew." She walks away, turning her attention to a second year Slytherin who has sprouted lollipop antlers.
Castiel watches at the wound closes up, skin closing over the open flesh and then there is no sign that anything ever happened, except for the slight tingle under the skin; phantom pains tickling his nerves.
When Castiel returns to his Dormitory he finds his fellow Hufflepuffs asleep. He undresses and then stops, head tilted, looking at his bed. The covers are ruffled, curled and twisted and it's clear that someone has been lying in it. The black and yellow quilt Jo's mom sent him for Christmas is, however, folded neatly and lain at the headboard, as if it is a pillow. He reaches out and picks it up, doesn't noticing the note as it slips out and soars to the floor.
It's a small piece of parchment, with Dean's small handwriting on it. Just four words. "I have a plan."
…
The next day Dean goes down for breakfast, panicking a little when he sees Castiel isn't there. The only bright spot is the barn owl that arrives with a package for him, and it turns out it's the ingredients he needs for the antidote. Sam has generously agreed to make it for him and he passes the ingredients to Sam before he leaves the Great Hall. After breakfast he and Jo work on their Transfiguration essay, but Jo quickly gives up and leaves because Dean can't focus. But Dean can't help it. He's worried Castiel hasn't found the note he left for him in his bed, but he's even more worried that Castiel has found it and is refusing to play along. Instead he sits sulking in the Common Room, in a chair in front of the fire, knees pulled up so that he can rest his chin on them.
"You would feel better if you went to see him." Pam says after a while, resting a hand gently on his arm.
Dean shuts his eyes. He loves his friends; all of them are like his family. But it's hard to have Pam as a friend. True seers are mostly shone because people feel eerie having them around. And it's true, it can be very difficult to have Pam around, to have someone who can read your state of mind like an open book, but Dean likes Pam. Because Pam doesn't flaunt her knowledge around and she doesn't stick her nose where it doesn't belong. But she still knows, she can't help it, and right now Dean wishes she would stay the hell away, because he's sure every single one of his emotions are so clear that even a flobber worm could read them, and to be frank it's a little embarrassing. But Pam must be aware that Dean is feeling this too. It's just past the point where she feels like she can care.
"Dean, you know I know what's going on, right? I've known all along." Her voice is quiet, soft and comforting as she sits down on the arm rest of his chair. "I knew the two of you were close, closer than anyone else on this school, and even I never quite understood the bond you two shared. And I know you wonder if you should have seen what the two of you had together. I feel the guilt you feel because you didn't." She lowers her face so it's level with Dean's. "But you can't look at it like that. Because you just didn't and I think that fact has made your relationship even stronger."
"But I've hurt him, Pam." Dean admits, and knows it's the Revelations Potion working, making him want to admit his feelings. "I don't know how long he's know what he's felt and we could have been together if only I'd been a bit smarter. And what if I've ruined it now? What if after all this time he's mad because it took a frigging potion for me to realize how great he is?"
"Dean he's been in love with you since our fourth year and he was sure you were never going to love him back. But he still stayed with you, hung out with your even though he was hurting because he couldn't have you, because your friendship was too important to him." Pam gets up and lightly smacks Dean in the head with her Divination book.
"I doubt he'll start hating you now, you doofus."
Dean looks after her as she gathers her stuff from the floor where she was studying and as she disappears up the stairs to her dormitory, Demon at her heals, leaving the Common Room empty except for Dean. Even after she is gone he still just looks at the stairway, unable to process the significance of her words.
It's not until the portrait swings open and he hears soft steps behind him that he drags his eyes away from the stairway. What he finds is Castiel staring down at him.
"Did I interrupt an epic moment between you and the dust motes?" Castiel asks, and for a moment Dean wants nothing more than to jump up and press his lips against Castiel's soft mount. But he holds himself back, though he doesn't quite know where he finds the strength.
Instead he just smiles, wide and genuine. Castiel seems confused, but end up smiling back, and Dean thinks it's the most wonderful thing he's seen in years, perhaps ever.
"So…" Castiel breaks the silence and shuffles his feet around, a nervous habit he's had ever since Dean's known him. "You wrote you had some sort of plan?"
"Yes." Dean's smile grows, if possible, even wider. "The plan is that you get over here and give me a fucking kiss already." Dean reaches over the back of the chair, grabbing Castiel's wrists and pulls him in, making the dark-haired boy tumble head first over the back of the chair and down into Dean's lap. Dean laughs at Castiel's confused face, leaning his face down, so close to Castiel's that they exchange air as they draw in breath.
"Are you mad at me?" Dean asks softly, stroking his fingers through Castiel's hair.
"You have no idea." Castiel smile, but there's still a distance there, a distance Dean doesn't want and isn't sure how to get rid of.
He closes the last bit of space between them and presses his lips against Castiel's, feeling his stomach jolt as Castiel's mouth move against his. One of his hands is still holding Castiel's wrists, but the other moves slightly, starting to gently caress Castiel's stomach. Castiel breaks the kiss and moves slowly, looking at Dean as if he's unsure if he's allowed. He stops when he's straddling Dean's lap, knees on each side of the Gryffindor's thighs.
He keeps looking at Dean as if at any moment Dean might stop him. And then Dean understands the distance, because they've been here before, actually. Maybe not exactly like this, but close. Bodies pressed close together, cuddling up in one armchair because it was the only free one left. Or Dean tiredly tipping over into Castiel's lap one day after watching the Quidditch match in a frigging storm, resting his head there as if it was the most natural thing in the world, which it had been for Dean at the time. But now there is the Potion, and perhaps it doesn't fabricate love, but it might make Dean say and do things he would never normally do in his attempts to make sure his feelings are known. He just doesn't know how to convince Castiel that he's not going to run away and hide once he's not forced to face his feelings anymore.
"Cas," He reaches up and gently brushes his fingers down Castiel's cheek. Castiel's eyes go wide, but he doesn't move. He just sits there looking slightly off-balanced, as if Dean is a confusing mystery.
Dean is about to continue, even though he's not sure what he's going to say, when Sam enters through the portrait of the fat lady. The Ravenclaw stops dead, looking at Dean and Castiel as if they're covered in Billywigs. "I…ehh." He starts and then lowers his eyes, stretching out his arm to present the cup he's holding instead. "I made the antidote. If you, you know, still care."
Dean almost cheers at his little brother, because this might be the only thing in the whole world that can get that uncertain look off Castiel's face. He makes grabby hands at Sam and his brother steps closer and hesitantly hands Dean the antidote. Dean takes a huge gulp, careful to leave half for Castiel, as he passes the cup to the boy straddling him.
The shift is immediate. It's like a space is opens up in his chest, one he wasn't even aware should be there and he can breathe freely again. When he looks up, Castiel is drinking the rest of the antidote, nose wrinkled in disgust at the taste. It makes Dean smile like a frigging child at Christmas, and it's so amazing, because nothing has changed when he looks at Castiel, not even a little. When he looks over his shoulder to thank Sam, his brother is already exiting through the portrait.
Dean's hands reach up, without permission from his brain, but it's okay now, because he doesn't need to think about what he says or does anymore, doesn't need to be afraid that Castiel will think his words are forced by a potion. They find the cup and take it from Castiel's hands, pulls it from his lips as Dean replace it with his own mouth.
The kiss grows deeper this time, less tentative, more craving and they break apart only because they are going dizzy from lack of oxygen.
"You know you have the right to punch me real hard, right? For being a piece of unobservant shit?" Dean says and it's a joke, but he means every word of it, and he wouldn't blame Castiel one second if he took him up on the offer.
It seems like Castiel has other plans though and a true smile spread across his face. "I've been wanting to punch you in the face for years, Dean." He then leans in close and Dean can feel his soft lips and teasing tongue trail along his jaw, up to the sensitive skin just behind his ear. "But if you've come this far, realizing that you've been missing out? I think there are other things I'd rather do."
Dean lets out a breathy moan as Castiel's words register in his head and seconds later in his groin and he presses up against Castiel without even thinking about it. And he doesn't have to think about it, because everything is so perfectly easy with Castiel and it doesn't take a potion for him to realize that he wants this, Castiel and Dean, for the rest of their lives.
~fin~