Tales of the Abyss :: Relative Indecision :: G :: Luke/Natalia
Title: Relative Indecision
Fandom: Tales of the Abyss
Pairings: Light Luke/Natalia, but it's only there if you want it to be. Really.
Rating: G
Genre: General
Word count: 1,331
Spoilers: Yes, for Natalia's past.
Summary: Natalia stresses over choices to be made, and Luke comforts her as only her betrothed can.
"...I just don't understand. Or rather, I do understand why he would hate the Score as he does, but... how could he think that destroying the world is the answer?" Natalia finally tore her eyes away from the distant skyline to settle them on Luke, looking as emotional as she was beginning to sound. "Does he honestly believe this is what his wife-" She paused and looked away again. "...What my mother would want?"
Luke dropped his gaze, thoughtful, and looked across the town below to resume her stare at the stars over the horizon. "I don't think anyone but Largo can really answer that," he figured. Natalia made a subtle sound, and he wasn't sure whether it was meant to be more resigned or sad.
"Yes, I suppose you're right." Her hands in her lap, she distractedly crossed and uncrossed her fingers. "It might sound naïve of me from his perspective," she went on after a moment, "but there is no justification for what the New Order of Lorelei is attempting. That's why... I imagine that if I were to ask him everything I just asked you, I would never be satisfied with his answer, or any answer that he could give me."
"...That might be true," Luke admitted, "but... maybe that's part of what belief is all about." He turned to her again. "Believing what you believe because you think it's right, even if no one else understands it - that's faith. I guess," he added. Natalia hesitantly nodded; Luke smiled warmly. "Still, it doesn't hurt to try. If you want to, ask him. The worst he could say is nothing." Looking up, she stared at him. "...What?" he asked.
"I think you're beginning to take after Guy," she said, sounding surprised herself. "That was rather... insightful of you." Luke scratched his head a little self-consciously, making a sound of denial, and Natalia gave a faint smile. "Thank you, Luke." She was silent for another several seconds - and then, softly, "...Might I ask you something personal?"
"What?"
"...When you first found out about Asch - who he is - did you ever... feel as though you hated him?" When he hesitated at the question, she quickly shook her head. "Forgive me - that was inconsiderate-"
"No," he interrupted, "it's okay." She watched him as he leaned back on the bench, staring skyward and thinking of how best to respond. "...It's more like I felt that I could, if I'd wanted to. Not for who he is, but because of how the truth made me feel."
"So you never did?"
"...No," he answered, completely honest.
"...I think I understand, but - part of me feels as though I should hate Largo for what he's doing, for not being..." She trailed off. Luke, watching her, was suddenly hit by the reality of how uncertain she looked. He'd seen Natalia upset before, never more so than when King Ingobert allowed the two of them to be driven from the capital - but this was different. She was no longer a young woman drifting between truths, suffering heartache and seeking acceptance; she was lost and confused. She knew who she was, but not how to act, which was a strange thing for him to see in her.
"...I don't think there's a right or wrong way to react," he said at last. "You have every right to be angry with him, and I wouldn't blame you for hating him - but I don't think you do," he added, earning a start from her. Her shoulders lowered a little as her attention returned to her hands.
"...I honestly don't know how to feel, Luke, or even think..."
"You don't have to fight him, Natalia," he tried again, but she shook her head.
"I know that no one expects me to, but all the same, I feel... obligated." She sighed lightly, and there was no attempt to hide it this time. "I don't know what to do," she murmured.
His expression solemn, Luke put his arm around her shoulders, and then stared when he felt a light tremble in her. Natalia only rested her head against him under his chin, and he gripped the top of her arm gently when her shaking subsided somewhat.
If she'd been anyone else, he wouldn't have sat that close to her in the first place, let alone initiated what he had, but Natalia was... Natalia, simply put. She'd been Natalia for the past eight years. However long she needed to sit there like that, she'd get it. "You still have some time to think about it," he pointed out. "But you don't have to push yourself."
"I know..." There was some half a minute of silence. "You've changed, Luke," she said quietly.
"You think so?"
"Yes. I think I know what the Fon Master... what Ion meant when he said that you'd always been kind - you do show it more."
"...Oh."
Natalia sat up at his blunt response, curiously searching his face. "What's the matter?"
"Nothing... I just... don't think I've done much," Luke covered.
"Of course you have." Her voice was only vaguely reproachful. "Humility is indeed a fine quality, but you're certainly allowed to acknowledge your accomplishments."
"Right. Sorry." He hoped that would end the off-track discussion, and luckily Natalia was satisfied. She went quiet again, this time for so long that he grew concerned. "...You okay?" he asked after a while.
"Yes." Her response felt automatic, but he blanked on what else to offer.
...I'm so bad at this. Asch would do a better job.
"I believe I'll retire for the night," she announced; maybe he imagined it, but she suddenly sounded much more tired than before. She stood up and he did the same, watching her as if for a sign of something else he could do.
"You need me to walk you back?" he offered. She smiled slowly at that, and he recognized the look as similar to the kind she used to give him back before this journey started: fond, hopeful, and a little proud - it was similar, but not the same.
"No," she said, "but thank you, Luke," and presented her hand to him, which he glanced at before looking aside as he always had in forthright refusal. If he expected her to complain again about his lack of proper manners in chivalry, he was surprised when she only moved to draw back, accepting the rejection in uncharacteristic silence. Luke wavered, and then before he could change his mind quickly took her hand in his and raised it, bowing his head just slightly but not kissing the back of her glove as was socially called for. He released her and straightened up as swiftly as he'd acted, not so much embarrassed as he was uncomfortable with such a stuffy gesture, and the very one he had denied her for years at that. Natalia stared, her arm seemingly frozen at that angle, but then abruptly reacted and drew both back in front of her chest, hands clasped. All day, whatever her expression - whether a frown or a forced smile - there had been that sense of uncertainty, a sadness, that was always present in her features, but now as she smiled somewhat shyly, openly pleased - for an instant all that anxiety seemed to disappear. It was a brief instant, easily missed in a blink, but Luke caught it.
Then reality settled back on her small shoulders, and the look she gave him was distracted again. "Goodnight, Luke."
" 'Night." He watched her go, sighing wearily to himself once the inn door closed behind her. She didn't deserve to go through something like this. If anything, she was the last person in the world who did.
Leaning on the nearby fence, Luke propped his chin in his hand and stared idly out over the town. He would head in shortly. For now, he wanted to think - and to put off the sleep he was sure wasn't coming anytime soon tonight.
Fandom: Tales of the Abyss
Pairings: Light Luke/Natalia, but it's only there if you want it to be. Really.
Rating: G
Genre: General
Word count: 1,331
Spoilers: Yes, for Natalia's past.
Summary: Natalia stresses over choices to be made, and Luke comforts her as only her betrothed can.
"...I just don't understand. Or rather, I do understand why he would hate the Score as he does, but... how could he think that destroying the world is the answer?" Natalia finally tore her eyes away from the distant skyline to settle them on Luke, looking as emotional as she was beginning to sound. "Does he honestly believe this is what his wife-" She paused and looked away again. "...What my mother would want?"
Luke dropped his gaze, thoughtful, and looked across the town below to resume her stare at the stars over the horizon. "I don't think anyone but Largo can really answer that," he figured. Natalia made a subtle sound, and he wasn't sure whether it was meant to be more resigned or sad.
"Yes, I suppose you're right." Her hands in her lap, she distractedly crossed and uncrossed her fingers. "It might sound naïve of me from his perspective," she went on after a moment, "but there is no justification for what the New Order of Lorelei is attempting. That's why... I imagine that if I were to ask him everything I just asked you, I would never be satisfied with his answer, or any answer that he could give me."
"...That might be true," Luke admitted, "but... maybe that's part of what belief is all about." He turned to her again. "Believing what you believe because you think it's right, even if no one else understands it - that's faith. I guess," he added. Natalia hesitantly nodded; Luke smiled warmly. "Still, it doesn't hurt to try. If you want to, ask him. The worst he could say is nothing." Looking up, she stared at him. "...What?" he asked.
"I think you're beginning to take after Guy," she said, sounding surprised herself. "That was rather... insightful of you." Luke scratched his head a little self-consciously, making a sound of denial, and Natalia gave a faint smile. "Thank you, Luke." She was silent for another several seconds - and then, softly, "...Might I ask you something personal?"
"What?"
"...When you first found out about Asch - who he is - did you ever... feel as though you hated him?" When he hesitated at the question, she quickly shook her head. "Forgive me - that was inconsiderate-"
"No," he interrupted, "it's okay." She watched him as he leaned back on the bench, staring skyward and thinking of how best to respond. "...It's more like I felt that I could, if I'd wanted to. Not for who he is, but because of how the truth made me feel."
"So you never did?"
"...No," he answered, completely honest.
"...I think I understand, but - part of me feels as though I should hate Largo for what he's doing, for not being..." She trailed off. Luke, watching her, was suddenly hit by the reality of how uncertain she looked. He'd seen Natalia upset before, never more so than when King Ingobert allowed the two of them to be driven from the capital - but this was different. She was no longer a young woman drifting between truths, suffering heartache and seeking acceptance; she was lost and confused. She knew who she was, but not how to act, which was a strange thing for him to see in her.
"...I don't think there's a right or wrong way to react," he said at last. "You have every right to be angry with him, and I wouldn't blame you for hating him - but I don't think you do," he added, earning a start from her. Her shoulders lowered a little as her attention returned to her hands.
"...I honestly don't know how to feel, Luke, or even think..."
"You don't have to fight him, Natalia," he tried again, but she shook her head.
"I know that no one expects me to, but all the same, I feel... obligated." She sighed lightly, and there was no attempt to hide it this time. "I don't know what to do," she murmured.
His expression solemn, Luke put his arm around her shoulders, and then stared when he felt a light tremble in her. Natalia only rested her head against him under his chin, and he gripped the top of her arm gently when her shaking subsided somewhat.
If she'd been anyone else, he wouldn't have sat that close to her in the first place, let alone initiated what he had, but Natalia was... Natalia, simply put. She'd been Natalia for the past eight years. However long she needed to sit there like that, she'd get it. "You still have some time to think about it," he pointed out. "But you don't have to push yourself."
"I know..." There was some half a minute of silence. "You've changed, Luke," she said quietly.
"You think so?"
"Yes. I think I know what the Fon Master... what Ion meant when he said that you'd always been kind - you do show it more."
"...Oh."
Natalia sat up at his blunt response, curiously searching his face. "What's the matter?"
"Nothing... I just... don't think I've done much," Luke covered.
"Of course you have." Her voice was only vaguely reproachful. "Humility is indeed a fine quality, but you're certainly allowed to acknowledge your accomplishments."
"Right. Sorry." He hoped that would end the off-track discussion, and luckily Natalia was satisfied. She went quiet again, this time for so long that he grew concerned. "...You okay?" he asked after a while.
"Yes." Her response felt automatic, but he blanked on what else to offer.
...I'm so bad at this. Asch would do a better job.
"I believe I'll retire for the night," she announced; maybe he imagined it, but she suddenly sounded much more tired than before. She stood up and he did the same, watching her as if for a sign of something else he could do.
"You need me to walk you back?" he offered. She smiled slowly at that, and he recognized the look as similar to the kind she used to give him back before this journey started: fond, hopeful, and a little proud - it was similar, but not the same.
"No," she said, "but thank you, Luke," and presented her hand to him, which he glanced at before looking aside as he always had in forthright refusal. If he expected her to complain again about his lack of proper manners in chivalry, he was surprised when she only moved to draw back, accepting the rejection in uncharacteristic silence. Luke wavered, and then before he could change his mind quickly took her hand in his and raised it, bowing his head just slightly but not kissing the back of her glove as was socially called for. He released her and straightened up as swiftly as he'd acted, not so much embarrassed as he was uncomfortable with such a stuffy gesture, and the very one he had denied her for years at that. Natalia stared, her arm seemingly frozen at that angle, but then abruptly reacted and drew both back in front of her chest, hands clasped. All day, whatever her expression - whether a frown or a forced smile - there had been that sense of uncertainty, a sadness, that was always present in her features, but now as she smiled somewhat shyly, openly pleased - for an instant all that anxiety seemed to disappear. It was a brief instant, easily missed in a blink, but Luke caught it.
Then reality settled back on her small shoulders, and the look she gave him was distracted again. "Goodnight, Luke."
" 'Night." He watched her go, sighing wearily to himself once the inn door closed behind her. She didn't deserve to go through something like this. If anything, she was the last person in the world who did.
Leaning on the nearby fence, Luke propped his chin in his hand and stared idly out over the town. He would head in shortly. For now, he wanted to think - and to put off the sleep he was sure wasn't coming anytime soon tonight.