all in the family or she's not heavy....
alright so just got an email from my sister, yes i have a sister, and apparently 3 other siblings that my father had, essentially trying to open up lines of communication. family is very important to me and this is incredibly confusing.
for me when i think of my family i think only of my mother and my 2 brothers that i grew up with. technically they are my haf brothers which for some implies a certain kind of disconnect but for me and my family it's irrelevant. ive always been envious of my brothers because they've always had relationships with thier fathers and thier fathers families and that stopped for me when i was about 7 years old. recenty my father contacted me via facebook and asked that i call him. i told him that i wasnt ready to talk to him on the phone but i gave him my e-mail so that we could correspond. he gave my e-mail to quiana, my sister who emailed me today.
i dont know how im supposed to open up my life these people who are related to me by blood but are complete strangers to me. ive never been good at keepinng in touch with people which is somthing my family understands...i dont know....the thing that really bothers me is that in quiana's e-mail she said that she heard i didnt want to communicate with terry (my father) which is entirely not the case. i just can't handle a phone conversation, it's too direct. i need to have the delay that comes with virtual letters. now i feel like im going to have to clarify this wih him which is a hassle. And what it really comes down to is that i don't want this to be somethinng that i have to do but at the same time these people are related to me and there is a part of me that wants to know them. uuhhhggg!
why coudn't i have family like the Cleaver's?
-sister sister
for me when i think of my family i think only of my mother and my 2 brothers that i grew up with. technically they are my haf brothers which for some implies a certain kind of disconnect but for me and my family it's irrelevant. ive always been envious of my brothers because they've always had relationships with thier fathers and thier fathers families and that stopped for me when i was about 7 years old. recenty my father contacted me via facebook and asked that i call him. i told him that i wasnt ready to talk to him on the phone but i gave him my e-mail so that we could correspond. he gave my e-mail to quiana, my sister who emailed me today.
i dont know how im supposed to open up my life these people who are related to me by blood but are complete strangers to me. ive never been good at keepinng in touch with people which is somthing my family understands...i dont know....the thing that really bothers me is that in quiana's e-mail she said that she heard i didnt want to communicate with terry (my father) which is entirely not the case. i just can't handle a phone conversation, it's too direct. i need to have the delay that comes with virtual letters. now i feel like im going to have to clarify this wih him which is a hassle. And what it really comes down to is that i don't want this to be somethinng that i have to do but at the same time these people are related to me and there is a part of me that wants to know them. uuhhhggg!
why coudn't i have family like the Cleaver's?
-sister sister