Fast forward again
Hmm, how peculiar it is looking back on this. It must be what having a real journal is like, which I fortunately spare myself the embarrassment of keeping. Even though it still makes me cringe at my own stupidity and immaturity, at least it seems I've made some progress.
So, July 20th, 2005 was my last entry. Very ironic, or perhaps not so much, that July 2005 was the first time I'd ever bought pot. Party with Jessica and Joe at some house on the West side, Lincoln Village, paid $20 for a dime, so I didn't get scammed too bad.
From there, that summer, I ended up hooking up with a friend's girlfriend the day after they broke up, then fucking her friend, and ensued more drama. Essentially, I had it all for a month, 2 fuck buddies who both knew about each other and didn't care. However, eventually the one got sick of my refusal to be in a relationship with her, and the other was 16 when I was 20 and her father caught me balls deep in her on his living room floor and sent her to live with her mother and abusive step father in North Carolina to keep her away from me. It was cool though. Rock n' roll. Deal with it. This was also the summer I discovered one of my favorite authors, Bret Easton Ellis.
By that autumn I was smoking a lot more weed, thanks to my Humanities 111 professor, Ms. Dagny. Of course, outside of class she was Janelle. She was a complete hippy chick at 31 years of age. Short read hair, cute features, glassy, nerdy. We ended up hooking up at an out-of-class extra credit event. A "poetry slam." Basically some lame idiots read poetry and they sell over priced alcohol there too. At the time I was only 20, so Janelle was kind enough to buy my drinks for me. The two of the other students that came ended up leaving around 1am, and I stuck around until last call. Janelle ended up taking me back to her apartment, as she was convinced I couldn't drive, and we ended up fucking. I fucked her thrice after that, once right after our final exam, once on New years Eve 2006, and once like a week before Valentine's day. On valentine's day she went out with some older guy, which saved me some trouble, I suppose. As for the winter of 2005/6, I suppose it's also important to note that I got a new computer, started playing wow, and repeated the exact same problems I was having before.
It was ok though. I suggested that Alex get a job at calltech and he did. Wow was fun and I smoked a lot of weed and Alex and I drank away most of our sorrows on the weekends. Alex met some people through work in February, and by March he and I were regulars at their parties. That's where I met Monica.
In Spring 06 I finally got rank 11 on the PvP charts on wow, and all it took was playing 16 hours a day, everyday, for 5 months. I had the skill, but I had no epics. I was frustrated, fed-up, done with it. Also, May was when I finally decided to quit wow and focus my efforts on Monica. At the end of May Monica and I went to cedar point, had a great time. We rode the ferris wheel and held hands and it reminded me of the ending credits to inyuasha, even though I hate that show, it was good. The following thursday monica and I went to the Nike bar and we fucked for the first time, though we had kissed in early may. I was too drunk to come that night. The next time we had sex was after some street fair. I fucked her and pulled out and jerked off onto her stomach, she said the sex was bad and it was, virtually 6 months of celibacy had sort of taken its toll on my confidence.
After the whole bad sex thing I figured Monica and I were done, but we still had lots of fun together and I'm still rather charming and we ended up having sex a third time and it was good. Very good. Then a fifth and sixth and seventh, separate occasions, and all of these were good. I had it back. Then we talking one day in early June about how cool it would be to go to Canada, and in a rush of pure impulse, we were driving to Canada four days later. Needless to say, Canada was amazing, and so was the constant sex, EVERYWHERE. Looking back I think going to Canada with her was the highlight of my entire life, and the summer of '06 was definitely my summer of '69, so to speak. We broke into pools and drank every day and had sex in every position and in every place we could think of to do it. We alienated our friends and fell in lust with each other and emersed ourselves in one another. I enjoyed it, and was even able to recognize myself taking it for granted at the time, but I also realized that taking it for granted was part of emersion. Even though I tried to hide the fact that I took it for granted, and did a good job, I'd catch myself thinking about how annoying Monica can be sometimes, and I started playing wow again in late June. This wasn't the collapse or anything though, it was just getting started, I had learned my lesson from anarchy online at least, and I never put wow ahead of Monica, and decided that any real life event with Monica would be better than the best wow in-game event (ok ok, I know I lied to her a couple times about having to work on Sunday so that I could go to Molten Core, but honestly I think that's the worst of it).
I've been writing for an hour now so I think I'll finish this later.... a few days, a few years, whatever.
So, July 20th, 2005 was my last entry. Very ironic, or perhaps not so much, that July 2005 was the first time I'd ever bought pot. Party with Jessica and Joe at some house on the West side, Lincoln Village, paid $20 for a dime, so I didn't get scammed too bad.
From there, that summer, I ended up hooking up with a friend's girlfriend the day after they broke up, then fucking her friend, and ensued more drama. Essentially, I had it all for a month, 2 fuck buddies who both knew about each other and didn't care. However, eventually the one got sick of my refusal to be in a relationship with her, and the other was 16 when I was 20 and her father caught me balls deep in her on his living room floor and sent her to live with her mother and abusive step father in North Carolina to keep her away from me. It was cool though. Rock n' roll. Deal with it. This was also the summer I discovered one of my favorite authors, Bret Easton Ellis.
By that autumn I was smoking a lot more weed, thanks to my Humanities 111 professor, Ms. Dagny. Of course, outside of class she was Janelle. She was a complete hippy chick at 31 years of age. Short read hair, cute features, glassy, nerdy. We ended up hooking up at an out-of-class extra credit event. A "poetry slam." Basically some lame idiots read poetry and they sell over priced alcohol there too. At the time I was only 20, so Janelle was kind enough to buy my drinks for me. The two of the other students that came ended up leaving around 1am, and I stuck around until last call. Janelle ended up taking me back to her apartment, as she was convinced I couldn't drive, and we ended up fucking. I fucked her thrice after that, once right after our final exam, once on New years Eve 2006, and once like a week before Valentine's day. On valentine's day she went out with some older guy, which saved me some trouble, I suppose. As for the winter of 2005/6, I suppose it's also important to note that I got a new computer, started playing wow, and repeated the exact same problems I was having before.
It was ok though. I suggested that Alex get a job at calltech and he did. Wow was fun and I smoked a lot of weed and Alex and I drank away most of our sorrows on the weekends. Alex met some people through work in February, and by March he and I were regulars at their parties. That's where I met Monica.
In Spring 06 I finally got rank 11 on the PvP charts on wow, and all it took was playing 16 hours a day, everyday, for 5 months. I had the skill, but I had no epics. I was frustrated, fed-up, done with it. Also, May was when I finally decided to quit wow and focus my efforts on Monica. At the end of May Monica and I went to cedar point, had a great time. We rode the ferris wheel and held hands and it reminded me of the ending credits to inyuasha, even though I hate that show, it was good. The following thursday monica and I went to the Nike bar and we fucked for the first time, though we had kissed in early may. I was too drunk to come that night. The next time we had sex was after some street fair. I fucked her and pulled out and jerked off onto her stomach, she said the sex was bad and it was, virtually 6 months of celibacy had sort of taken its toll on my confidence.
After the whole bad sex thing I figured Monica and I were done, but we still had lots of fun together and I'm still rather charming and we ended up having sex a third time and it was good. Very good. Then a fifth and sixth and seventh, separate occasions, and all of these were good. I had it back. Then we talking one day in early June about how cool it would be to go to Canada, and in a rush of pure impulse, we were driving to Canada four days later. Needless to say, Canada was amazing, and so was the constant sex, EVERYWHERE. Looking back I think going to Canada with her was the highlight of my entire life, and the summer of '06 was definitely my summer of '69, so to speak. We broke into pools and drank every day and had sex in every position and in every place we could think of to do it. We alienated our friends and fell in lust with each other and emersed ourselves in one another. I enjoyed it, and was even able to recognize myself taking it for granted at the time, but I also realized that taking it for granted was part of emersion. Even though I tried to hide the fact that I took it for granted, and did a good job, I'd catch myself thinking about how annoying Monica can be sometimes, and I started playing wow again in late June. This wasn't the collapse or anything though, it was just getting started, I had learned my lesson from anarchy online at least, and I never put wow ahead of Monica, and decided that any real life event with Monica would be better than the best wow in-game event (ok ok, I know I lied to her a couple times about having to work on Sunday so that I could go to Molten Core, but honestly I think that's the worst of it).
I've been writing for an hour now so I think I'll finish this later.... a few days, a few years, whatever.