data dump
when I was writing papers in school, my professor taught us to do a "data dump" to clear our thoughts instead of trying to form coherent arguments with all the details and references of the entire essay swimming around in our heads
I can't even attempt to write an entry today - so I'll just throw it all out there, data dump style
I feel empty and indifferent
and I hate feeling this way
at the same time all of a sudden I'm very much drawn to art, mostly abstract, and have found myself staring at colors and shapes while my mind wanders for what seems likes hours on end - but when I snap out of it - it's only been a minute or two
I usually love reading and getting caught up in the intricacies of other people's stories (whether real or works of fiction) and lately, I really can't be bothered
There are a million and one things I know I'd love to learn, but I can't bring myself to get motivated (which is SO unlike me, it's not even funny)
The new people that have come into my life recently have been so base and vile, it's made me question whether I should make myself so available to meet new people (perhaps I should just shut myself in and hibernate - which is surprisingly easy to do in the summer in Florida)
Also I hate Florida - which I think is really where all the indifference and gross people issues ultimately stem from, but I'm not in a position to up and leave (but I would LOVE to)
Dispassionate, unwilling, and misanthropic - what a way to be...
can barely bring myself to ask for suggestions - cause honestly, what's the point?
EDIT: I refuse to sound like an ungrateful git so here's a list of things that despite the crap listed above still happen to be true
I am healthy - wonderously and completely unencumbered by any health concerns - I'm able to eat anything I want, enjoy pushing myself in yoga and volleyball to the full extent, sleep soundly and for as long as I can without being late for the day ahead
I have an income - not an excellent career, but security that a lot of people don't right now and not a day goes by that I don't appreciate it
In my 24 years, I've travelled and experienced things far outside the typical fare and it's memories of those times that sustain me
I've come a long way and am really comfortable and proud of who I am as a person - as a professional, as a friend, as a companion (for the right person when I meet him - the gorgeous, lucky son-of-a-gun) and as me - the one and only
And like all things, this too shall pass
there, that's a little better...
I can't even attempt to write an entry today - so I'll just throw it all out there, data dump style
I feel empty and indifferent
and I hate feeling this way
at the same time all of a sudden I'm very much drawn to art, mostly abstract, and have found myself staring at colors and shapes while my mind wanders for what seems likes hours on end - but when I snap out of it - it's only been a minute or two
I usually love reading and getting caught up in the intricacies of other people's stories (whether real or works of fiction) and lately, I really can't be bothered
There are a million and one things I know I'd love to learn, but I can't bring myself to get motivated (which is SO unlike me, it's not even funny)
The new people that have come into my life recently have been so base and vile, it's made me question whether I should make myself so available to meet new people (perhaps I should just shut myself in and hibernate - which is surprisingly easy to do in the summer in Florida)
Also I hate Florida - which I think is really where all the indifference and gross people issues ultimately stem from, but I'm not in a position to up and leave (but I would LOVE to)
Dispassionate, unwilling, and misanthropic - what a way to be...
can barely bring myself to ask for suggestions - cause honestly, what's the point?
EDIT: I refuse to sound like an ungrateful git so here's a list of things that despite the crap listed above still happen to be true
I am healthy - wonderously and completely unencumbered by any health concerns - I'm able to eat anything I want, enjoy pushing myself in yoga and volleyball to the full extent, sleep soundly and for as long as I can without being late for the day ahead
I have an income - not an excellent career, but security that a lot of people don't right now and not a day goes by that I don't appreciate it
In my 24 years, I've travelled and experienced things far outside the typical fare and it's memories of those times that sustain me
I've come a long way and am really comfortable and proud of who I am as a person - as a professional, as a friend, as a companion (for the right person when I meet him - the gorgeous, lucky son-of-a-gun) and as me - the one and only
And like all things, this too shall pass
there, that's a little better...