phone calls
so i got a (illegal) phone call from maggie and colleen from their retreat like prolly half an hour ago. and it was meant to be like nice, but it depressed me for some reason. like i cried when i hung up the phone. now i'm thinking about it and came up with possible reasons why:
1. they're all woo and like yay retreat. now i have no problem with them enjoying their retreat. it's good. bond with God. whatever. However, if this be the case, I really wish I had been spared all the complaining before the retreat. Because i kept being like it'll probably be fun. At least you know someone. they're like NO I don't wanna GO!
2. them being all like woo retreat made me remember last year's retreat for me, where i pretty much sat alone until i went up to this group of people and was like hey can i sit by you? and of course they were nice and said yes, but pretty much ignored me anyways cuz they had all their friends there. so even tho i kept telling myself to just try to enjoy it and get something out of it, it's really hard to have ask people to be able to sit with them and then get ignored anyways. and i'm afraid that's how this year is gonna be too.
3. I was asleep. and they're like oh you party pooper, why are you asleep at 6 o clock, etc. normally i'd be like haha whatever, but first of all i wasn't feeling well so that's why i was asleep. second of all after they called i couldn't go BACK to sleep.
4. i feel pathetic cuz i'm sitting here home alone on a saturday but if you think about it, four of the peope i hang out with the most are gone on retreat, and yeah i hung out with people yesterday but they were people i wasn't as close with so idk.
5. I feel twice as pathetic as i sit here typing a livejournal entry about how pathetic i feel and how depressing a phone call from my two best friends was.
so i'm officially ending this entry. just felt like writing. comment on how dumb i am if you wish. i give you permission cuz i feel dumb so you may comment on it.
Things I should be doing:
*homework
*FORENSICS PIECE
*finding someone to do something with tonight
*eating
*SOMETHING OTHER THAN WRITING IN LJ
1. they're all woo and like yay retreat. now i have no problem with them enjoying their retreat. it's good. bond with God. whatever. However, if this be the case, I really wish I had been spared all the complaining before the retreat. Because i kept being like it'll probably be fun. At least you know someone. they're like NO I don't wanna GO!
2. them being all like woo retreat made me remember last year's retreat for me, where i pretty much sat alone until i went up to this group of people and was like hey can i sit by you? and of course they were nice and said yes, but pretty much ignored me anyways cuz they had all their friends there. so even tho i kept telling myself to just try to enjoy it and get something out of it, it's really hard to have ask people to be able to sit with them and then get ignored anyways. and i'm afraid that's how this year is gonna be too.
3. I was asleep. and they're like oh you party pooper, why are you asleep at 6 o clock, etc. normally i'd be like haha whatever, but first of all i wasn't feeling well so that's why i was asleep. second of all after they called i couldn't go BACK to sleep.
4. i feel pathetic cuz i'm sitting here home alone on a saturday but if you think about it, four of the peope i hang out with the most are gone on retreat, and yeah i hung out with people yesterday but they were people i wasn't as close with so idk.
5. I feel twice as pathetic as i sit here typing a livejournal entry about how pathetic i feel and how depressing a phone call from my two best friends was.
so i'm officially ending this entry. just felt like writing. comment on how dumb i am if you wish. i give you permission cuz i feel dumb so you may comment on it.
Things I should be doing:
*homework
*FORENSICS PIECE
*finding someone to do something with tonight
*eating
*SOMETHING OTHER THAN WRITING IN LJ